update: He Left!

[y2k]

We just spoke last night - he did indeed leave, moved quickly to a friend's place for the time being. They did meet with a counselor to figure out how to break it to the kids, 10 & 14 years. Well, lo and behold, the kids DID NOT FREAK OUT. They were pretty calm.

 

This is something I want to highlight to anyone wanting to stay in an un-happy marriage "for the sake of the children".

 

If you know how to communicate to your children, then the kids will understand.

 

Kids don't need un-happy parents who don't want to be with each other under one roof. Kids need parents who are happy in their personal lives, and parents who will be there for the kids when the kids need either one of them.

 

So if you're reading, and are in an un-happy marriage (or any situation of the such) then don't stay "for the sake of the children". You're doing no one a favor.

[Silly_Girl]

This is something I want to highlight to anyone wanting to stay in an un-happy marriage "for the sake of the children".

 

If you know how to communicate to your children, then the kids will understand.

 

Kids don't need un-happy parents who don't want to be with each other under one roof. Kids need parents who are happy in their personal lives, and parents who will be there for the kids when the kids need either one of them.

 

So if you're reading, and are in an un-happy marriage (or any situation of the such) then don't stay "for the sake of the children". You're doing no one a favor.

 

Unfortunately it is often the parents who are unable to deal with the concept of divorce and start using the kids as pawns and the point-scoring gets out of hand. Still many kids get caught in protracted legal battles and the emotional distress surrounding that is enormous.

 

I think some people hear the crazy tales of how bad it can be (Kramer vs Kramer anyone?) and it's enough to colour their judgement, sadly. Because I agree that for some (marriages) - and the kids of those marriages - divorce is the key to a happy future.