Love&KissesXoXo Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 We talked a few times, and in our very first conversation he had mentioned that he wants to take things slow. I totally understand that. He gives me all the signs that he likes me, but then again, he'll go through days/weeks ignoring me. I also do some ignoring too because I dont want to be the one chasing him or coming off as desperate. I have a feeling he could just shy... but after weeks of playing this ignoring game, I no longer know how he feels toward me. And im sure he doesnt know how i feel about him..... How do i get him to stop ignoring me and start chasing me again?? Or why is he ignoring me? I feel like he gets super shy/nervous around me now.....
CrestfallenNoMore Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 I'd say it's one of two things. 1. He's dating someone else and likes her more but doesn't want to cut you loose until they are exclusive. 2. He's not really into you.
Author Love&KissesXoXo Posted October 6, 2010 Author Posted October 6, 2010 I'd say it's one of two things. 1. He's dating someone else and likes her more but doesn't want to cut you loose until they are exclusive. 2. He's not really into you. you think so?
CrestfallenNoMore Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 Well, it's just my opinion from the limited information I have. But I don't think it's a good sign if he ignores you for weeks. In my experience, if a guy really likes you, he won't allow for such ambiguity.
carhill Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 You and he have only talked a few times and, even thus, he challenges you by wanting to 'take it slow', then largely ignores you, and here you are, all full of him in your head, posting on LS. Doc, I'll take a three month supply of the 'take it slow' pill. Man, that's a good one... Seriously, OP, fugetabouthim. Remember his name *only* if he asks you out on a date, and even then work at remembering it. Good luck
Author Love&KissesXoXo Posted October 6, 2010 Author Posted October 6, 2010 Well, it's just my opinion from the limited information I have. But I don't think it's a good sign if he ignores you for weeks. In my experience, if a guy really likes you, he won't allow for such ambiguity. So should i just continue to ignore him? Im so desperate (in love with him..lol), i dont want to do or say the wrong thing to him...
CrestfallenNoMore Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 So should i just continue to ignore him? Im so desperate (in love with him..lol), i dont want to do or say the wrong thing to him... Yes - ignore him. And then examine why you're so desperate for someone and in love with a man you hardly know.
carhill Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 Maybe he's taking things slow to save up money to pay for the date OP, how old are you? Sometimes it's better to give age-appropriate advice.
Author Love&KissesXoXo Posted October 6, 2010 Author Posted October 6, 2010 You and he have only talked a few times and, even thus, he challenges you by wanting to 'take it slow', then largely ignores you, and here you are, all full of him in your head, posting on LS. Doc, I'll take a three month supply of the 'take it slow' pill. Man, that's a good one... Seriously, OP, fugetabouthim. Remember his name *only* if he asks you out on a date, and even then work at remembering it. Good luck Ive known him for 7 months and we recently exchanged phone numbers. I didnt call him till a month later, after i got his number. He called me a few times, then ignored me for almost two weeks. And I would ignore him as well, but Im developing feelings and now that I have feelings for him, he's ignoring me.
Author Love&KissesXoXo Posted October 6, 2010 Author Posted October 6, 2010 Maybe he's taking things slow to save up money to pay for the date OP, how old are you? Sometimes it's better to give age-appropriate advice. Im my mid twenties...
CrestfallenNoMore Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 Ive known him for 7 months and we recently exchanged phone numbers. I didnt call him till a month later, after i got his number. He called me a few times, then ignored me for almost two weeks. And I would ignore him as well, but Im developing feelings and now that I have feelings for him, he's ignoring me. How can you develop feelings for someone you aren't even talking to? The answer is: you can't. You're developing feelings for the image of him you've been creating in your mind. And that image isn't the real him. The real him isn't talking to you, isn't showing much interest and doesn't seem to care about you. That him isn't worth falling in love with, is it?
carhill Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 Ah, yes, mid-twenties. Did a fair amount of pedestal-building during that time. You're developing feelings for the image of him you've been creating in your mind. And that image isn't the real him. This poster is wise. OP, if this really has happened, he likely is aware of your feelings and the balance of power is squarely in his favor. He hasn't yet earned the privilege of your care and concern, evidenced here. That's the imbalance. Who else have you dated in the last seven months?
Author Love&KissesXoXo Posted October 6, 2010 Author Posted October 6, 2010 How can you develop feelings for someone you aren't even talking to? The answer is: you can't. You're developing feelings for the image of him you've been creating in your mind. And that image isn't the real him. The real him isn't talking to you, isn't showing much interest and doesn't seem to care about you. That him isn't worth falling in love with, is it? But i never had such intense feeling/chemistry with anyone before... Until I meet this guy, everything just feels so perfect... But you are right... so now, how do i stop from feeling this way??
Star Gazer Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 But i never had such intense feeling/chemistry with anyone before... Until I meet this guy, everything just feels so perfect... But you are right... so now, how do i stop from feeling this way?? But it's not feeling so perfect NOW, right? Because he's ignoring you? That's all you need to know.
Author Love&KissesXoXo Posted October 6, 2010 Author Posted October 6, 2010 Ah, yes, mid-twenties. Did a fair amount of pedestal-building during that time. This poster is wise. OP, if this really has happened, he likely is aware of your feelings and the balance of power is squarely in his favor. He hasn't yet earned the privilege of your care and concern, evidenced here. That's the imbalance. Who else have you dated in the last seven months? Ive dated a few guys, but never seem to connect with anyone of them... No matter how hot they were, I just cant make myself like them...
CrestfallenNoMore Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 But i never had such intense feeling/chemistry with anyone before... Until I meet this guy, everything just feels so perfect... But you are right... so now, how do i stop from feeling this way?? We've all been there, believe me. That's how we learned to give advice to others. The quickest way to get over your feelings is to initiate zero contact (even if he contacts you), focus on yourself and interests, spend time with people who care about you and realize, always, that you will feel that way again someday. He's just one guy - and not so special in the big scheme of things.
Author Love&KissesXoXo Posted October 6, 2010 Author Posted October 6, 2010 We've all been there, believe me. That's how we learned to give advice to others. The quickest way to get over your feelings is to initiate zero contact (even if he contacts you), focus on yourself and interests, spend time with people who care about you and realize, always, that you will feel that way again someday. He's just one guy - and not so special in the big scheme of things. *cries *cries k Thanks guys!!!! Good Night...
bac Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 If you like him, there are probably a bunch of other girls who like him as well. If he is in mid 20s, he is probably not interested in you. He is not going to change and start chasing you. But, you have nothing to lose, contact him and invite him for dinner at your place or smth else. Then, see what happens. If he does not like you, he might come for dinner anyway.
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