Is Misandry increasing in America?

[classof2014]

Disclaimer: This thread is not meant to be a man vs. woman thread. I am not trying to claim that men are better nor is this one of those "American women suck" thread. This thread is only to discuss a sociology concept I see in my daily life.

 

Ok, so here's the thing. Im a male college student and I can't help but notice the increasing amount of misandry in our society. Many women (maybe even most) do not hate men, but it seems like an increasing number of women do not like men or find themselves superior to men simply because they are women. Our media seems to reaffirm this most likely because women are the consumer armies. However, I also notice that the courts seem to be extremely biased against men. Divorce seems to always be for women and many bosses are now terrified of sexual harassment lawsuits. There was even a movement a couple years back to get women to sign a "no rape charge" contract when she began sexual relationships with her BF. My parents are in a divorce and I've seen firsthand how unfair the courts are to men. Its really appalling.

 

However, sadly it seems like women are suffering to. Many nice and hardworking women I see are unable to get in relationships because they don't fit the mold of the "modern american woman," which seems to be selfishness and the believe that women are better because they are women. It now seems like many YOUNG men are attractive to women that make them feel bad because I believe this aggressiveness subconciounsly makes these men believe they will be able to have sex faster. Also, more and more young men only focus on sex and nothing else. It is like a drug. The book guyland did a poll that said that 20% of UCLA students would rape a girl if they could get away with it. So in my conclusion, misandry in increasing in America but men share 50% of the blame, because they are becoming attracted to these type of women.

 

What do you think?

[AverageJoe]

Of course it is increasing. Especially with the judicial system in favor of females most of the time. What male wants to face that? Better to avoid it all together. So in return they get unintended consequences.

[Tony]

CAUTION: Stick to the topic of this thread. If any bashing of either sex occurs, this thread will be immediately deleted. Many thanks for your kind cooperation.

[Woggle]

It is rampant in every aspect of society. The more I notice the more I wish I could be blissfully ignorant again because it is everywhere.

[Knittress]

Nah. Most people are too busy living their lives.

[AverageJoe]

Tony, Hi. If you dont mind, would you please set out the paramiters of what gender bashing may be? I normally dont coddle people, or have a PC outlook. So if you could define that boundry, I (we) would appreicate it. Doing so would provide us some common ground with some possible constructive dialogue.

 

Thanks.

[Tiberius]

Look at tall women. If anything they get frustrated because they cant find a taller guy they like, because thats what they want. Sure there are girls who enjoy being taller or stronger, but I guess most dont like being "the man".

 

A lot of women get a good education. A lot of men do too. The men generally are quite flexible, if he is a doctor he will take the nurse, but also the surgeon if she is hot.

 

Women on the other end prefer a man their equal or better in income and social standing and if our society reaches a certain degree of equality and a big number of educated men pick underachieving women, then some well educated women cant get a good educated man of their own, because there are not enough "winners" to go around and that frustrates them and that is not good for their mood.

 

If the Herr Doctor picks the nurse, over the female lawyer or the female surgeon, the female surgeon could pick the male nurse or the postman, but many women have a hard time to deal with that. So women who you percieve as feeling superior are in my opinion just really frustrated they cant get a man they deem desirable and generally unhappy about it, else they would be more pleasant to be around.

[brainygirl]

I don't think that there is a bias against men in most parts of society. I think that the exceptions would be in child custody cases, although this is changing, and in employment in any area that involves caring for or teaching very young children.

 

I DO think that as a society that was very recently very male-centric, men who've been raised to expect things to be a certain way or who had things a certain way formerly and now can't, might feel picked at.

 

It was less than 20 years ago that women even could accuse a husband of rape, as if having married the man gave him the right to do whatever, whenever. Not long before then, women had difficulty maintaining property or banking accounts that weren't their husbands' also.

 

Even now, women face biases that men don't. Overweight women earn less than fit women, but a man's weight doesn't affect his income. Women not only have to do their jobs well, they have to look good doing it.

 

And I'm not even going to get into the fact that jobs of equal levels of training and specialization pay very differently if they are traditionally male versus traditionally female.

 

I am not discounting the idea that the OP may have faced specific instances of anti-male bias in his personal life. But I doubt that it's endemic or systemic.

[johan]

I doubt it's increasing. I have a hard time believing women ever liked men any more than they do now. They were more dependent on them in the past, and therefore more submissive. But men are just as likable and respectable now as they ever were, which in many cases is not so much.

 

Women are just more independent now. They are more outspoken. And they are more able to leave an unsatisfying or bad relationship. Whether the guy she's leaving is any good is often irrelevant.

[jamesum]

WTF is with all this whining about misandry?

 

Im a guy and I really dont see it in my daily lives.

 

Of course there are some unfair laws in the judicial system, but really thats pretty much it.

 

These people need to just shut the hell up. They are sounding like white people whining about the colored people in the 60s.

 

There are things I dont like about what women do such as being disgusting gold diggers. But it has nothing to do with misandry.

Edited September 26, 2010 by jamesum

[Woggle]

Being a gold digger has much to do with misandry. In many cases we are seen as nothing more than sperm donors and walking wallets which gold digging is a result of. Men who don't notice it are blind and do not realize why things are the way they are.

[brainygirl]

Being a gold digger has much to do with misandry. In many cases we are seen as nothing more than sperm donors and walking wallets which gold digging is a result of. Men who don't notice it are blind and do not realize why things are the way they are.

 

there are lots of women, including myself, who don't want a man to support them and don't want a man just to make babies with, they (and I) want men in their lives to be partners with, and because we don't "need" men, they men are less attracted to us.

 

There's really no way to win.

[Woggle]

there are lots of women, including myself, who don't want a man to support them and don't want a man just to make babies with, they (and I) want men in their lives to be partners with, and because we don't "need" men, they men are less attracted to us.

 

There's really no way to win.

 

One thing men hate in a relationship is feeling disposable and in many cases today men are made to feel just that.

[sanskrit]

There is definitely an anti-male bias in universities, the media, courts, jails, politics, everywhere in the U.S., England, Australia.

 

Women are responsible for 50% of domestic violence, where's the Violence against Men Act? Where are the shelters for male victims of domestic violence? Many local, state and federal sexist laws are in the process of being overturned. Good on them. Men are the victims of most violent crimes and murders, yet all you hear about is violence against women.

 

Male suicide rate is 4x that of women in the U.S., yet women are and were "oppressed."

 

Between 20-50% of rape claims are false, especially date rape claims on college campuses where women are encouraged that "merely feeling uncomfortable about something you did means you were raped," yet no one talks about how many men are put through hell wrongly.

 

Millions and billions of taxpayer funds are spent on women's health issues, almost none on men, despite that men live 7-10 years less than women. Men pay 60-70% of taxes and receive 1/12 - 1/8 of government subsidized medical expenditures depending on what study you read. Many federally funded breast cancer awareness groups, few if any prostate cancer groups. Certain feminists still claim they are oppressed victims, yet continue living 7-10 years longer and commit 1/4 of the suicides, how does that even make sense?

 

Fictional television and movies portray (white) men as either crooks, buffoons, pedophiles, jerks or boy-toys, incapable of functioning on their own without the "all knowing, all wise" wife or GF. This is disturbing because dramatic shows are designed to reflect the attitudes of the mostly female audience, else they are cancelled or reworked for more feminine appeal, so fiction reflects elements of the female view or fantasy of what life should be, what the audience really believes or wants.

 

Young boys are taught that being male is "less than" in schools, because most teachers are socialist leaning females, men are taught that the big lies of feminism are true, history is rewritten to depict everything (white) men do as oppressive, violent or perverse. See Christina Hoff Sommers' book on the subject (though she is a feminist, she is hated by feminists because she doesn't preach misandry).

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christina_Hoff_Sommers

 

Don't even get me started on universities and family court.

 

Check out this very well-known article from the NY Times for some obvious misandry. In it, men who were lied to by their wives or GF about paternity are painted as the villains when they seek to stop paying child support to children that aren't theirs. The women who lied to them? Free pass, completely unaccountable.

 

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/22/magazine/22Paternity-t.html?_r=1

 

Draw attention to the above simple facts and you are liable to be called a misogynist.

 

People are waking up to this, good women and men, and am not sure that misandry is "increasing," in fact it might have peaked in the late 90s.

[GooseChaser]

One thing men hate in a relationship is feeling disposable and in many cases today men are made to feel just that.

Women hate feeling disposable and replaceable too.

[GooseChaser]

There is definitely an anti-male bias in universities, the media, courts, jails, politics, everywhere in the U.S., England, Australia.

 

Women are responsible for 50% of domestic violence, where's the Violence against Men Act? Where are the shelters for male victims of domestic violence? Many local, state and federal sexist laws are in the process of being overturned. Good on them. Men are the victims of most violent crimes and murders, yet all you hear about is violence against women.

 

Male suicide rate is 4x that of women in the U.S., yet women are and were "oppressed."

 

Between 20-50% of rape claims are false, especially date rape claims on college campuses where women are encouraged that "merely feeling uncomfortable about something you did means you were raped," yet no one talks about how many men are put through hell wrongly.

 

Millions and billions of taxpayer funds...

 

...

 

People are waking up to this, good women and men, and am not sure that misandry is "increasing," in fact it might have peaked in the late 90s.

Men have the right to go to the police if they are victims of violence. They just might not seek that help because it could hurt their pride or ego.

 

About the male suicide rate, from what I have heard, men do have a harder time with emotional things. They are quieter about their pain and often do not seek help when they need it. Women, on the other hand, are more willing to go and find someone to help them. Men could improve this by not being self-conscious and just going to a counselor. Men should also take some pressure off of themselves and not beat themselves up for things that aren't worth the pain or things that aren't their fault.

 

Women in history HAVE undeniably had a rough time in society. Yes, they may have been supported financially by their husbands, but they had much less freedom and independence as women. It's been less than a century that women have had the right to vote. Men are still paid more for the same work than women. There are still prejudices, though things are becoming more equal between the sexes over time, and that is something to celebrate.

 

I have my own experience regarding "rape." My parents have put pressure on me to go to the police regarding the man I have been getting involved with. They are afraid he has abused or even raped me. I am intelligent, and know that this is not the case. It was completely consensual, always. He made a point to let me know that I didn't have to do anything I wasn't comfortable with. When I did make the choice to get physical with him, I was totally ready for it and a willing participant. I was not a victim. In fact, I went to the police last week to talk to an officer, telling him the exact same thing, in case my parents tried to go to the police about it in my place. (Luckily, the officer reassured me that I would have to be the one to claim to be a victim, and no one else could do that for me.) I don't want my friend to get in serious trouble for doing nothing wrong. Other decent women would do the same. Anyway, even if someone wrongly accused a man of "raping" her, the police would be sure to get both sides of the story, consider them, and give their best effort to have justice be served. It is a very serious accusation, and one that the police would not take lightly in their investigations.

 

It is not surprising that men pay most of the taxes in the country, because they earn the majority of the income. As women become more prominent in the workforce, they will start to pay more and more of the share of taxes, and things will begin to even out. Women are being educated in high school, and many are going on to universities, both at the undergraduate and graduate level, to earn a college degree. Personally, I plan to go as far as I can in the education system, and I fully expect to earn a high income, which will help to supplement my (hopefully) future husband's income, or allow him to take a lower-paying job that makes him truly happy, if that is his wish. If I do not have a man in my future, I will be able to support myself.

 

It is true that often men are not portrayed in the best light in mass media. This is something which would be nice to see a change in. It is important to remember, however, that these television programs are just that-- fictional. The media often distorts and exaggerates. What is most important is the state of things in reality, and that we are aware of it. Most sitcoms are not documentaries. Most people have enough awareness to know this and take things with a grain of salt.

 

I've had plenty of teachers who were both male and female. Thinking about it, the proportion was about half and half, if I had to guess. Not sure, though. I just know that I had plenty of male teachers. This semester at college, I have one male professor. If you ask me, it is impressive that so many women at my community college have reached the status of professor! They are clearly highly educated, and that is a great thing! In fact, it is inspiring! Rest assured, there are plenty of men out there in very prominent positions. You have a good point that teachers are very influential to their students, and having many female teachers could have a great effect. Perhaps one effect would be the inspiration of respect in their students, and the exertion that women can hold important jobs and do a great job, just like men.

Edited September 27, 2010 by GooseChaser

[brainygirl]

One thing men hate in a relationship is feeling disposable and in many cases today men are made to feel just that.

 

You don't want a gold digger, we can all agree that is a bad way to be, but you think that if I am with you because I enjoy your company you are disposable? Like I said, can't win.

 

And in any case, in a dating relationship, the idea is that the two people enhance each other's lives. If that isn't happening, the relationship needs to end, so in a sense, all dating relationships are disposable.

[Woggle]

It is a dilemna men face. We like to feel needed and if a woman can support what purpose do we have in her life? I still can't figure why my wife married me and that is why many men are intimidated by self sufficient women.

[jamesum]

It is a dilemna men face. We like to feel needed and if a woman can support what purpose do we have in her life? I still can't figure why my wife married me and that is why many men are intimidated by self sufficient women.

Lol, you can be very very funny sometimes Woggle.

 

There are women like your wife who actually wanna be with a man because she loves him even if he is penniless. I know such women are like needles in a haystack but you should be happy to have found one of those needles.

[GooseChaser]

It also makes it easier for a woman to get with a man who isn't rich if she makes her own income too and doesn't completely depend on him.

[TaurusTerp]

It is a dilemna men face. We like to feel needed and if a woman can support what purpose do we have in her life? I still can't figure why my wife married me and that is why many men are intimidated by self sufficient women.

 

Just you, man. I don't want a woman that's dependent on me. I want a partner, not a pet.

[jamesum]

It also makes it easier for a woman to get with a man who isn't rich if she makes her own income too and doesn't completely depend on him.

In reality, in every relationship, the partner who has the money also has the power.

[GooseChaser]

In reality, in every relationship, the partner who has the money also has the power.

That makes sense! How about if both people make an equal amount?

[jamesum]

That makes sense! How about if both people make an equal amount?

Then the woman has the power. :p:p

[sanskrit]

Men have the right to go to the police if they are victims of violence. They just might not seek that help because it could hurt their pride or ego.

 

Actually, the police usually put the man in jail even when he's the victim, a woman threatening a man with a knife or gun is not just hurting his ego.

 

Men could improve this by not being self-conscious and just going to a counselor.

 

Or maybe perhaps it's not just a matter of refusing to see a shrink, but that their lives are pretty bad and hopeless? An overwhelming amount of the homeless are male.

 

Women in history HAVE undeniably had a rough time in society.

 

..as did everyone who wasn't the king, queen, high church officials, or a member of the aristocracy.

 

It's been less than a century that women have had the right to vote.

 

Non property owning (aristocrats) men didn't get the vote til 1850. Women began getting the vote soon after in many areas, despite that the actual Constitutional amendment wasn't enacted until 1920.

 

Men are still paid more for the same work than women.

 

This is not the case. In fact, accounting for the fact that men work more hours, thus more higher paying overtime, and work for longer uninterrupted duration in years in the employment market, and don't take time outs to raise children which reduces their relative experience level (employers pay more for more experience), men make less than women. Moreover, men do almost all the hazardous work (oil rigs, truck driving 50-75k per year) that pays more because of danger, while women gravitate to more comfortable, safe, and low-paying work environments (bank tellers, administrators) (25-50k per year). Women also have numerical superiority in several relatively high paying areas, nursing, marketing, human resources.

 

Anyway, even if someone wrongly accused a man of "raping" her, the police would be sure to get both sides of the story, consider them, and give their best effort to have justice be served. It is a very serious accusation, and one that the police would not take lightly in their investigations.

 

Men go to jail whenever a woman makes a claim of rape, and may get out on bail in a few days or weeks (depending on their economic circumstances), but make no mistake, they go straight to jail. Here is a good blog post on how "justice is served."

 

http://www.crimeandfederalism.com/2009/09/real-life-date-rape-case.html

 

 

It is not surprising that men pay most of the taxes in the country, because they earn the majority of the income.

 

The point is not that men earn more income, which is because they work more, but that despite dying 7-10 years earlier than women, and paying a lion's share of taxes, only receive ~10% of the tax money they pay back for men's medical issues such as prostate cancer, that are every bit as deadly as diseases that affect women. Now admittedly some of this is due to the high % of government medical funds spent on childbirth, but just some though.

 

Women are being educated in high school, and many are going on to universities, both at the undergraduate and graduate level, to earn a college degree.

 

Your information is a bit dated. Women outnumber men in college and many graduate programs right now.

 

It is true that often men are not portrayed in the best light in mass media. This is something which would be nice to see a change in.

 

Very refreshing, thanks.

 

It is important to remember, however, that these television programs are just that-- fictional. The media often distorts and exaggerates. What is most important is the state of things in reality, and that we are aware of it. Most sitcoms are not documentaries. Most people have enough awareness to know this and take things with a grain of salt.

 

Well the point was that the audience for fictional television is overwhelmingly female, so the fact that bad representations of men do in fact "sell well" to a female audience is directly dispositive of a misandrist attitude in modern American culture.

 

I just know that I had plenty of male teachers.

 

It's about 3:1, and the problem Professor Sommers described in her book was in elementary school, where people are shaped for life.

 

Thanks, btw, for your neutral, non insulting tone in discussing this.