LongRecovery Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 It happened to me to kiss more than once on our first date, after 2 hour lunch. I sent an SMS in the evening saying it was a wonderful afternoon and we should meet next week, but no reply. This happens on the weekend. How long should I wait before contacting again? Also, from female perspective, what would woman think if she got into kissing after knowing a guy for two hours? I really like the woman I met, and I really don't want to screw up.
bobdole Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 Some say yes - some say know. I'm sure Green will be here shortly to scream at you "KISS HER!" I tend to just go with whatever feels right. I think that's the best answer. Also if you kissed her and she didn't pull away or give you the cheek - ou made the right move. In regards to contacting her - you like her so no more than a day IMO, but I don't subscribe to "the dating rules"
Author LongRecovery Posted September 13, 2010 Author Posted September 13, 2010 Some say yes - some say know. I'm sure Green will be here shortly to scream at you "KISS HER!" I tend to just go with whatever feels right. I think that's the best answer. Also if you kissed her and she didn't pull away or give you the cheek - ou made the right move. No, she kissed me on the mouth, and then I continued. Perhaps I should have left it at just the single kiss. In regards to contacting her - you like her so no more than a day IMO, but I don't subscribe to "the dating rules" I do not subscribe to dating rules either, but have to be thoughtful about what I am doing.
GooseChaser Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 Kissing on a first or second date would be a good sign. You could take it as having good chemistry and comfort level with the person. Don't you think? What also matters is if it is a good kiss. Preferably it is.
Author LongRecovery Posted September 13, 2010 Author Posted September 13, 2010 Kissing on a first or second date would be a good sign. You could take it as having good chemistry with the person. Don't you think? I feel incredible chemistry, and I am blown away. What also matters is if it is a good kiss. Preferably it is. Ah, it was gentle kissing on the lips, and I felt a lot of connection. I think different women prefer different ways, so who knows.
Philetus Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 It happened to me to kiss more than once on our first date, after 2 hour lunch. I sent an SMS in the evening saying it was a wonderful afternoon and we should meet next week, but no reply. This happens on the weekend. How long should I wait before contacting again? Also, from female perspective, what would woman think if she got into kissing after knowing a guy for two hours? I really like the woman I met, and I really don't want to screw up. So you met on the weekend, shared a kiss in the afternoon, and you sent her a message that evening saying something short and sweet. So far, so good. I'd give her three days to respond. If she hasn't be then, send a follow up message acknowledging you've already contacted her (she may not have gotten your message). Say something like, "Hi, I don't know if you got my message on ___day? I had a wonderful time the other afternoon and I'd love to see you again. Are you free this ___day?" If you don't hear back, it's 90%+ that she's not interested. There's nothing wrong with kissing at the end of a two-hour lunch date but I almost never try it unless I have a strong indication it's gonna be okay.
seekandfind Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 I'd give her three days to respond. If she hasn't be then, send a follow up message acknowledging you've already contacted her (she may not have gotten your message). Say something like, "Hi, I don't know if you got my message on ___day? I had a wonderful time the other afternoon and I'd love to see you again. Are you free this ___day?" If you don't hear back, it's 90%+ that she's not interested. You don't want to do this. If she doesn't respond to the text you sent the afternoon of the date, then when you contact her again, don't mention the text at all. The last thing you want to do is seem like you are butt-hurt about the fact that she didn't reply. Just be positive and upbeat, and ask her how she is doing, if is she is having a good week, etc... and then see if she is free later in the week to meet up with you. I would give her a call the 2 days after the date has passed, not the very next day, especially since she ignored your text. And if you want to arrange another date, make sure to call and not text, unless you think she really prefers texting.
Author LongRecovery Posted September 13, 2010 Author Posted September 13, 2010 So you met on the weekend, shared a kiss in the afternoon, and you sent her a message that evening saying something short and sweet. So far, so good. I'd give her three days to respond. If she hasn't be then, send a follow up message acknowledging you've already contacted her (she may not have gotten your message). Say something like, "Hi, I don't know if you got my message on ___day? I had a wonderful time the other afternoon and I'd love to see you again. Are you free this ___day?" If you don't hear back, it's 90%+ that she's not interested. There's nothing wrong with kissing at the end of a two-hour lunch date but I almost never try it unless I have a strong indication it's gonna be okay. It is possible she did not get it. I have no reasons to believe that she would not be interested, unless I said something unusual in the last 5 minutes. Yes, I will SMS as you suggest. Thanks a lot.
GooseChaser Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 It's good to give her the benefit of the doubt. Best wishes.
Author LongRecovery Posted September 14, 2010 Author Posted September 14, 2010 It's good to give her the benefit of the doubt. Best wishes. Yes, gave it and was the right thing. We talked on the phone and everything is fine. We are meeting for lunch in a couple of days. I am tempted to say "screw this dating s**t, I feel very attracted to you, lets jump into it". I am sure many of you will disagree, but I am annoyed by following dating rules etc. Any insights from experience?
USMCHokie Posted September 14, 2010 Posted September 14, 2010 I always kiss on the first date now. Thank you Green. And as for when to contact her? You contact her when you want to set up the second date. Don't worry about any stupid "dating rules" like everyone is saying, and don't worry about what she might think of you contacting her at some specific time. If she has a problem with you contacting her "too soon," then LAUNCH...call it what you will...fundamental incompatibility...games...she's batsh*t crazy...whatev's...
Author LongRecovery Posted September 14, 2010 Author Posted September 14, 2010 I always kiss on the first date now. Thank you Green. And as for when to contact her? You contact her when you want to set up the second date. Don't worry about any stupid "dating rules" like everyone is saying, and don't worry about what she might think of you contacting her at some specific time. If she has a problem with you contacting her "too soon," then LAUNCH...call it what you will...fundamental incompatibility...games...she's batsh*t crazy...whatev's... MAN, you made my evening. I have been recently a bit by some rules, forgetting that I should be ME, no matter what. If somebody has a problem, move on. So, I will do things the way I feel them, and period. Would you agree.
somedude81 Posted September 14, 2010 Posted September 14, 2010 Frankly I'm not really a kiss on first date guy. I really want to like somebody before I kiss them. So odds are that on the first date, I don't know her that well and it's not really possible to have feelings for somebody at that point. The exception is if I've been talking to her for a while and we had a date after a month or so. That's enough time to get some interest in her. That's when a first date kiss makes sense for me. But if it's just some chicks that I met today and somehow will have a date with her this weekend. A first date kiss doesn't feel appropriate.
atlnay Posted September 14, 2010 Posted September 14, 2010 Rules are meant to be broken. I agree if she is a rigid rule follower, you should cut her off. Just read the threads here of women who subscribe to that way of thinking. In the end, it can be a lot of drama. Hopefully what you've found is a mature physically compatible chick good luck to ya!
Author LongRecovery Posted September 14, 2010 Author Posted September 14, 2010 Rules are meant to be broken. I agree if she is a rigid rule follower, you should cut her off. Just read the threads here of women who subscribe to that way of thinking. In the end, it can be a lot of drama. Hopefully what you've found is a mature physically compatible chick good luck to ya! She is mature, self sufficient, and fun. I have never felt such chemistry in the air. There was something similar with my ex wife, but not to this extent. Truth is, I cannot handle for very long "what if's", so I will just say what I feel without worrying. I already told her in the first hour and a half that she is cute and has very good energy around her. She kissed me first out of the blue, which makes me think she feels chemistry too. There were sparks in the eyes of both of us, I am sure. Friend of mine told me play hard to catch. Don't feel playing it, although I can be good a that.
Raderick Posted September 14, 2010 Posted September 14, 2010 I usually go for the kiss on the first date, but the last one I went on I did not simply because I didn't dig the gal, she lied about her weight and she insisted on making me pay for everything which came to about $70 (went to Dave and Buster's, not doing that again on a first date!).
USMCHokie Posted September 14, 2010 Posted September 14, 2010 I usually go for the kiss on the first date, but the last one I went on I did not simply because I didn't dig the gal, she lied about her weight and she insisted on making me pay for everything which came to about $70 (went to Dave and Buster's, not doing that again on a first date!). Oh, well of course I would never kiss a girl that I wasn't interested in going on a second date with...all she'd get is perhaps a handshake or a hug at most with a "it was nice to meet you, take care"...
Raderick Posted September 14, 2010 Posted September 14, 2010 Oh, well of course I would never kiss a girl that I wasn't interested in going on a second date with...all she'd get is perhaps a handshake or a hug at most with a "it was nice to meet you, take care"... That's pretty much how we parted ways. She seemed so entitled of everything and wanted to take the prize I won (Madden 2011 for the 360 - I had tickets from earlier visits) for herself. I told her I'd buy her something with my remaining tickets but backed-tracked when she didn't pay for her food and asked me to pay. I simply texted her and said I had a good time, and never contacted her since. With that said sorry for stealing the thread, back to your regular scheduled discussion about kissing!
USMCHokie Posted September 14, 2010 Posted September 14, 2010 Friend of mine told me play hard to catch. Don't feel playing it, although I can be good a that. Bullsh*t games like that are for those who can't otherwise attract women or more often those who are trying to attract a woman who isn't interested in them... You don't need such bullsh*t games to attract women...let your awesomeness speak for itself...
Author LongRecovery Posted September 14, 2010 Author Posted September 14, 2010 Bullsh*t games like that are for those who can't otherwise attract women or more often those who are trying to attract a woman who isn't interested in them... You don't need such bullsh*t games to attract women...let your awesomeness speak for itself... Absolutely agree. Looking back, I was most desired when I was really what I am. I have no reason to worry: well educated, good job, good physical shape, and even done little modelling. I have been lacking self confidence recently, but I was also screwed big time during divorce, so just getting back to life.
Star Gazer Posted September 14, 2010 Posted September 14, 2010 I really don't think you can ever contact a woman too soon. You can contact her too late though. As for kissing on the first date, if it feels right, go for it! I always like it right in the middle of the date too, not like at the door when the pressure's on. Something like this: (Skip to 1:35 and watch from there... ) "I think I got some of your pickle..."
tylerdurden Posted September 16, 2010 Posted September 16, 2010 You shouldn't have sent that message so soon.You have to let wonder about you. Don't come too strong, personally I would have waited a couple of days.Now she knows that she is having you in her pocket. Wait until she contact you to contact her again.
Author LongRecovery Posted September 29, 2010 Author Posted September 29, 2010 Friends, I need little guidance, honestly. So, my friend first freaks out that I have like 20-22 year old female friends on my facebook. We are in early forties. She says she does not want to compete with them. One is my son's girlfriend, the rest are daughters of friends, I took photos at various occasions and tagged them. Then the distance is the problem. We live an hour from each other. Last Friday we went crazy making out at her place in the afternoon, but no sex. This happens on the second date. Today she tells me good luck searching for a partner. She does not feel romantic as I am not funny and playful. We have seen each other for 5 hours in total and practically no phone conversations. That is, she did not click as she says. However, she is incredibly attracted to me physically and also incredibly attracted by my intellect. I am also terribly attracted to her. I just told her "You will be mine, and I am not worried about it. You need to go back and forth for a while, but we will be together." She says she likes my confidence. Honestly, I feel the situation is gone, but really wanted to see some views. As I said, the main problem seems that we have different sense of humour, not that I do not have it. I am thinking no contact for say a week and then doing something out of the blue, like showing up with flowers (too trivial) and walking way. Anything you may suggest, especially the female audience?
Author LongRecovery Posted September 29, 2010 Author Posted September 29, 2010 Friends, I need little guidance, honestly. So, my friend first freaks out that I have like 20-22 year old female friends on my facebook. We are in early forties. She says she does not want to compete with them. One is my son's girlfriend, the rest are daughters of friends, I took photos at various occasions and tagged them. Then the distance is the problem. We live an hour from each other. Last Friday we went crazy making out at her place in the afternoon, but no sex. This happens on the second date. Today she tells me good luck searching for a partner. She does not feel romantic as I am not funny and playful. We have seen each other for 5 hours in total and practically no phone conversations. That is, she did not click as she says. However, she is incredibly attracted to me physically and also incredibly attracted by my intellect. I am also terribly attracted to her. I just told her "You will be mine, and I am not worried about it. You need to go back and forth for a while, but we will be together." She says she likes my confidence. Honestly, I feel the situation is gone, but really wanted to see some views. As I said, the main problem seems that we have different sense of humour, not that I do not have it. I am thinking no contact for say a week and then doing something out of the blue, like showing up with flowers (too trivial) and walking way. Anything you may suggest, especially the female audience?
welikeincrowds Posted September 29, 2010 Posted September 29, 2010 Now she knows that she is having you in her pocket. This is the sort of horse**** some men convince themselves of that I hope to never accidentally practice myself. People just want to feel appreciated. If some girl thinks of of you as "in her pocket" because you sent her a text saying "I had a great time" after a first date, then she's a ****ing lunatic. You can think of her lost interest as a personal favor.
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