Author irc333 Posted September 10, 2010 Author Posted September 10, 2010 How old are these people again? I've been to these types of things, and probably the exact same one are talking about in the past, if it took place last week in the South , the women there are FAR from self-conscious or sensitive about being stared at. They certainly love being photographed, can tell you that much. Mix of young adults to people in their 40's (a couple in their 50's). Remember the Pest Spray in the 80's that Muhammad Ali advertised?....kind of the name for it (or acroynm) lol.
that girl Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 I just find it odd, to stereotype single males as drooling bafoons. Oh I find it more than odd, I find it kind of offensive. The thing is, you are apparently the kind of guy who doesn't care how he makes women feel, so I get why they created that rule. [i noticed UMCHokie said [i]glance[/i] and most women won't mind a glance, the thing is some not so nice guys stare. Like they'll notice your uncomfortable and not stop starring or make a rude remark. Good guys don't act like this so they don't always get it.] you'd be suprised how hot these women are, and who cares, the events are only for 3 days. lol. Then you all go home and don't see each other again. How hot a woman is does not effect whether or not she likes being stared at. This private group has rules because their members care about this stuff, so obviously it is a big deal to them. I talked with some other women, and they see it the same way as well, don't dress that way, if you don't want to be gawked at. Plain and simple. But the women involved do care and have therefore created a private group. You don't get to put on a fur bikini as part of a cavegirl costume, go to a SciFi convention, and then complain about people staring. Sorry, there are limits. Again, the OP was turned away from a private group, not a convention. The other thing is people usually cosplay a specific fandom, so they're not picking their costumes so much as their fandom.
meerkat stew Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 Again, the OP was turned away from a private group, not a convention. The other thing is people usually cosplay a specific fandom, so they're not picking their costumes so much as their fandom. You are making unwarranted assumptions on several levels and using lots of jargon that may not even be applicable to the people OP was talking to.
Author irc333 Posted September 10, 2010 Author Posted September 10, 2010 You are making unwarranted assumptions on several levels and using lots of jargon that may not even be applicable to the people OP was talking to. The group is making unwarranted assumptions that if you're single, and a man, you're a threat to their clan. Also, dudes can gawk at their women, and not even be in their club anyhow. So it's rather moot. And this club tends to hold public after parties, where they're "women" stand up on stage, in bikni-like costumes, and shake their arses, while we single dudes drink and gawk to our hearts desires. Some of the ladies even participate in Pole-dancing. Oh, wait, we can't stare at the pole dancers. lol
Imajerk17 Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 (edited) Here is something you need to get about women: (1) Women love to be noticed and appreciated, by the right man. (2) Women are extremely concerned for their safety. They particularly fear guys with no self-control who will force themselves on her, and a guy who stares too long is indicating that he might, *might*, be that guy. Think about what staring at a woman 'too long' and 'the wrong way' says about a guy: (A) No self-control. She is wondering what you will try to do to her. Scary. (B) Doesn't have many attractive women around--in other words, he is something of a loser, at least when it comes to the ladies. Not sex-worthy. EDIT: In the club, creepy guys can sort of blend into the background as far as the women are concerned. In a smaller community such as your group, they cannot. That is why women dress the way they do in the club where there are lots of men, but the women in your group are leery of single guys joining. Edited September 10, 2010 by Imajerk17
tami-chan Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 Here is something you need to get about women: (1) Women love to be noticed and appreciated, by the right man. (2) Women are extremely concerned for their safety. They particularly fear guys with no self-control. Think about what staring at a woman 'too long' and 'the wrong way' says about a guy: (A) No self-control. She is wondering what you will try to do to her. Scary. (B) Doesn't have many attractive women around--in other words, he is something of a loser, at least when it comes to the ladies. Not sex-worthy. Interesting. So let's say for example, "that girl"( with apologies to "that girl") goes to one of these convention dressed in an itsy-bitsy bikini.. if she digs the one who is doing the staring, it would not be wrong and she will not be scared BUT if the guy is someone she is not attracted to, she would think it was rude and wrong and she would be scared?..hmmmm.. I say, if you are displaying something for the public, whether that was the original intent or not, expect to be stared at-that's what displays are for!
Author irc333 Posted September 10, 2010 Author Posted September 10, 2010 Not unlike this video Interesting. So let's say for example, "that girl"( with apologies to "that girl") goes to one of these convention dressed in an itsy-bitsy bikini.. if she digs the one who is doing the staring, it would not be wrong and she will not be scared BUT if the guy is someone she is not attracted to, she would think it was rude and wrong and she would be scared?..hmmmm.. I say, if you are displaying something for the public, whether that was the original intent or not, expect to be stared at-that's what displays are for!
that girl Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 Think about what staring at a woman 'too long' and 'the wrong way' says about a guy: (A) No self-control. She is wondering what you will try to do to her. Scary. (B) Doesn't have many attractive women around--in other words, he is something of a loser, at least when it comes to the ladies. Not sex-worthy. I think A is somewhat true, but B is not at all true. And this club tends to hold public after parties, where they're "women" stand up on stage, in bikni-like costumes, and shake their arses, while we single dudes drink and gawk to our hearts desires. Some of the ladies even participate in Pole-dancing. Oh, wait, we can't stare at the pole dancers. lol Considering the staring thing, that is completely bizzare, but I think you are still missing the point. These women do not want single men in their group because they don't want to be stared at in the group. Rather than thinking "Man, I would never stare like that, it si just rude" you're thinking "They're sexy ladies, they exist to be stared at. They should put up with me looking, we wouldn't even see each other that much so they can deal." The second one isn't cool and it isn't respectful. I get why they don't want single men in the group after hearing your thoughts.
meerkat stew Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 Remember the Pest Spray Clever, yep that's the one. Not a lot of shrinking violets there, most were drunk as I recall and having a grand ole time. Took about 200 pics til my digital camera battery ran dry. Can completely see some of the dudes overprotecting their "flock o leias" though, not exactly a dominant male scene.
Author irc333 Posted September 10, 2010 Author Posted September 10, 2010 A. is just her being paranoid...that's her own personal problem. Guess I'll never get the point "that girl", guess we're going to have to agree to disagree. Now please stand by for some Slave Leahs, lol I think A is somewhat true, but B is not at all true. Considering the staring thing, that is completely bizzare, but I think you are still missing the point. These women do not want single men in their group because they don't want to be stared at in the group. Rather than thinking "Man, I would never stare like that, it si just rude" you're thinking "They're sexy ladies, they exist to be stared at. They should put up with me looking, we wouldn't even see each other that much so they can deal." The second one isn't cool and it isn't respectful. I get why they don't want single men in the group after hearing your thoughts.
that girl Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 A. is just her being paranoid...that's her own personal problem. It really isn't and that reason for being uncomfortable with staring guys (that they might do something) was originally suggested by a guy. Many if not most women have had a guy act really inappropriately to the point of being frightening. A guy who just won't leave them alone to the point of following them several blocks, a guy who harasses them with sexual requests, etc. Women do not know that you are a nice guy who will never physically harm them (assuming you are).
Author irc333 Posted September 13, 2010 Author Posted September 13, 2010 Yeah, it happens, but no need to be paranoid about it when there's really no justification to be that way. It's just assumed, by the group that "All single men will hit on or stare/look at their women" He suggested when getting to know people, just get to know the men of the group (not the women.) And I said, "Um...why just limit myself to the men?" And that's where his unjustified reasons were revealed. Basically, if you're single and you're a man, you're assumed to be a threat. (Yeah right, as if married men weren't a threat, too funny) It really isn't and that reason for being uncomfortable with staring guys (that they might do something) was originally suggested by a guy. Many if not most women have had a guy act really inappropriately to the point of being frightening. A guy who just won't leave them alone to the point of following them several blocks, a guy who harasses them with sexual requests, etc. Women do not know that you are a nice guy who will never physically harm them (assuming you are).
lab_brat Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 I agree that staring is rude...but these women know exactly what they're doing when they show up in their 1.5 piece Leia costume...just like I know exactly what I'm doing if I show up in a 300 Spartan costume... I mean, come on...really...? Wait, you have a 300 Spartan costume? All sexual harassment aside, its nearly my birthday. I demand photos please.
dispatch3d Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 What's more likely: (1) The women hate when guys check them out or "stare" at them and it makes the "uncomfortable" (possible but yeah girls don't like male attention...oookkkaayyy) (2) The (insecure) guys in the group don't like single guys going into their group and hitting on their women especially when they are dressed to the nine.
Author irc333 Posted September 13, 2010 Author Posted September 13, 2010 (edited) Someone mentioned earlier, that this had the same characteristics as a "swingers" group. Funny you mentioned this...because rumors have been mentioned that this particular group possibly mate swaps or swings. Good eye, man good eye. lol So this group could have possibly a Dual purpose. Edited September 13, 2010 by irc333
MrNate Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 You think I'd let someone take pic's? With an ass this big?? Get real!! How lovely.
MrNate Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 I agree that staring is rude...but these women know exactly what they're doing when they show up in their 1.5 piece Leia costume...just like I know exactly what I'm doing if I show up in a 300 Spartan costume... I mean, come on...really...? *high fives hokie* That kind of Leia costume is just begging for glances/attention. Should we also mark it up to coincidence that she picked the 'slave' version, who is conveniently dressed in scantily clothing...instead of more conservative attire? I think not.
USMCHokie Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 *high fives hokie* Internet high-five! Wait, you have a 300 Spartan costume? All sexual harassment aside, its nearly my birthday. I demand photos please. Hahah, I'll see what I can do...
phineas Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 It almost sounds like the other single guy in the group wanted to stack the deck in his favor. I seriously doubt there are no single women in this group.
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