EyeAlone Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Have any of you ever done that? A bunch of my friends and I have profiles on OKC and we were sharing horror stories today. One of our conversations dealt with how instantly disappointed you feel when you meet the other person for the first time and they don't really resemble their profile picture or not as attractive. Then you have to carry some of that disappointment in the back of your head throughout the entire date. Well, one of my friends said that one time he met a girl who he was talking to on OKC and she was heavier (according to my friend, approx 30 lbs) in person than she appeared in her pics. Apparently she had posted some older ones of herself on the website. He looked at her and said "You lied, goodbye" and just went to his car and left. I'm not sure how I feel about this. It seems kind of rude of my friend but at the same time, she did give a false impression of herself. He told me that there's no point of the date if he knows instantly that he will be not be attracted to her and that they would be starting off on a bad note knowing that she posted the older pictures. So have any of you done that? What are your thoughts about this?
melodymatters Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Personally, I believe your friend acted like a bit of an ass. I understand feeling the no attraction thing instantly, prob most of us have been there, but if it was SOLELY about the 30 lbs, well, a person can lose that in 6 weeks, but your friend may still be a shallow *******....
xpaperxcutx Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Sorry but your friend really does sound like an *******, yet at the same time he had a right to walk. Speaking of such a situation, I went to a party two months back, and while there I met someone who brought two friends along to the bash. One of the friends happened to be a girl from Germany and she weighed about 200 lbs ( by her size, she looked really obese despite wearing a very cute dress). Later that night, I found out something fromanother person who was close friends with the guy- apparently the guy and the german girl had met online and had corresponded for three months prior before he decided to buy her a ticket to come stay with him for a week here in America. Yet, the shocking thing was he had thought she was thin, because according to the picture that she had posted, she supposedly looked thinner than her actual person. So the guy was stuck with this for a week while she stays with him.
SpanksTheMonkey Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Personally, I believe your friend acted like a bit of an ass. I understand feeling the no attraction thing instantly, prob most of us have been there, but if it was SOLELY about the 30 lbs, well, a person can lose that in 6 weeks, but your friend may still be a shallow *******.... Melody has nailed this one right on the head why not be a gentile men and say something like "your a nice person but I just don't think this is going to work out and I have a few other things I really need to get done today" and then exit gracefully or for that matter anything other then what he said. Sure she may have lied/stretched the truth and thats not right either but 2 wrongs seldom make a right. And he would have come out of it better off for looking like the more mature one instead of a total shallow wank...
skydiveaddict Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 I agree your friend needs to be more of a gentleman.
kalikula Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 I almost walked out on a date today. We were just chatting, not flirting, and he says "The reason I never sat next to you in class was because I got too horny and I couldn't handle it." ... We never even HUGGED. Who just says that? Talk about uncomfortable. Thinking about it, I really should have just left at that point. PS I do think your friend was a bit rude, could have said she didn't look like her picture, not quite as harsh..
SpanksTheMonkey Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Sorry but your friend really does sound like an *******, yet at the same time he had a right to walk. Speaking of such a situation, I went to a party two months back, and while there I met someone who brought two friends along to the bash. One of the friends happened to be a girl from Germany and she weighed about 200 lbs ( by her size, she looked really obese despite wearing a very cute dress). Later that night, I found out something fromanother person who was close friends with the guy- apparently the guy and the german girl had met online and had corresponded for three months prior before he decided to buy her a ticket to come stay with him for a week here in America. Yet, the shocking thing was he had thought she was thin, because according to the picture that she had posted, she supposedly looked thinner than her actual person. So the guy was stuck with this for a week while she stays with him. Thats just messed up he should have sent her straight back for lieing that much I assume she knew he wanted a possible relationship? common the man bought you over a thousand dollar ticket duh 200 pounds isent baby fat girl. Thats quite a lot for a guy if hes not into overweight women she got herself a sucker and a free vacation I can't Imagen the look on his face at the airport sounds like a decent guy not to go mental on her girls like that give other overweight women a bad reputation..
meerkat stew Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 well, a person can lose that in 6 weeks, HOW? cut off a leg? I need that diet for after the holidays to fit in my dinner jacket on NYE. To the topic, I have been really lucky with online dates, had only two I considered walking out on. Number one called me cheap after I had bought us $80 worth of drinks, but only had $2 cash to tip the car valet with, and while we were drinking the drinks, had asked me point blank if I had erectile dysfunction. Number two showed up at least 30 pounds overweight, unshowered, wearing borrowed clothes that were two sizes too small and gave her a gut that poked out onto the table between us, started talking about all the alcoholics she had dated after I ordered a bottle of wine, and then began crying at the dinner table over a dude who had dumped her that week. See, when you walk out, the story is not NEARLY as good, and I only gave the high points of each, they are much better in a crowd over cocktails. So never walk out on a date as you may be missing the best story op of your life. Most of my other good stories involve livestock and semi-illegal acts, so are not suitable in churches at weddings, funerals or with police around. Internet date stories are good pretty much anywhere.
xpaperxcutx Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Thats just messed up he should have sent her straight back for lieing that much I assume she knew he wanted a possible relationship? common the man bought you over a thousand dollar ticket duh 200 pounds isent baby fat girl. Thats quite a lot for a guy if hes not into overweight women she got herself a sucker and a free vacation I can't Imagen the look on his face at the airport sounds like a decent guy not to go mental on her girls like that give other overweight women a bad reputation.. Well I would imagine he wanted a relationship considering he did buy her the ticket. It was really, really shocking especially since the night of the party was also the same day he went to the airport to pick her up. Needless to say, he didn't smile much at all that night, and looked really spaced out, as if he zoned out enough, he could will himself into disappearing.
TaurusTerp Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 I think this should become standard policy, really. Plus you should get your account deleted. I would find it incredibly irritating if my date showed up 30 pounds heavier than her pictures. I can't imagine women feel all that different.
xpaperxcutx Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 I think this should become standard policy, really. Plus you should get your account deleted. I would find it incredibly irritating if my date showed up 30 pounds heavier than her pictures. I can't imagine women feel all that different. Well, most women don't come out and say " You're ugly, good-bye" and then walk away... although I imagine some shallow woman would. Half the time, women are humble enough to at least give the date a try. The most she can do is end the date early. I think in circumstances such as blind dates it's always nice to have a friend as back up on the phone so they can call you with an emergency at the right time to hustle you out of there.
SpanksTheMonkey Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Oh the same kind of subject there are always nuts out there I once had a guy meet up with me and then take me in his car to a place about 3 towns over good 20 min drive only to duck out and leave me stranded there. Now I didn't drive and there was no bus service in that town and I had sent him CURRENT FULL body shots I hide nothing on line if anything I try to go for the most realistic images so he was just a fruit loop at the end of the day..
WalkInThePark Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Have any of you ever done that? A bunch of my friends and I have profiles on OKC and we were sharing horror stories today. One of our conversations dealt with how instantly disappointed you feel when you meet the other person for the first time and they don't really resemble their profile picture or not as attractive. Then you have to carry some of that disappointment in the back of your head throughout the entire date. Well, one of my friends said that one time he met a girl who he was talking to on OKC and she was heavier (according to my friend, approx 30 lbs) in person than she appeared in her pics. Apparently she had posted some older ones of herself on the website. He looked at her and said "You lied, goodbye" and just went to his car and left. I'm not sure how I feel about this. It seems kind of rude of my friend but at the same time, she did give a false impression of herself. He told me that there's no point of the date if he knows instantly that he will be not be attracted to her and that they would be starting off on a bad note knowing that she posted the older pictures. So have any of you done that? What are your thoughts about this? I think it is very rude to walk away simply because you find the date unattractive. I have had dates where I immediately noticed that there was no way I would ever find the person attractive. Yet my approach has always been that I want to make the date a pleasant experience for myself and the other person. I want the other person to walk away from the date with a positive feeling. So whatever was planned on the date, a drink, a dinner, a walk, I always intended to go through with it. At the end of the date I would not say anything about a second date, just say that I would keep in touch. I then send a mail afterwards to say that I enjoyed the date but that I did not think there was the necessary chemistry to take it further. This said, I have walked away from dates. But that was not because of a lack of attractiveness. Once it was because the guy had put him as single on the profile and was wearing a wedding ring. Another time it was because the guy was extremely rude to the waitresses.
SadandConfusedWA Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 One of the guys I met via online dating showed up looking at least 30lbs heavier than his picture. He was borderline obese and he has put "average" in his profile. I didn't walk out as I felt it was rude to do so. I have only walked out on a date once. I met a guy online that when we met up gave me a really creepy vibe. There was something off about him that I couldn't quite put my finger on. I felt like I could be in danger. I am not sure how accurate my perception was - but I decided not to risk it. I excused myself to go to the toilet and then went for the nearest exit. I ended up running home (not walking) from the restaurant.
Gallaxia Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 (edited) It's hard to do a graceful exit when it's clear you've been lied to intentionally or not ( by someone elses lack of acceptance, delusion or denial). I haven't walked out on a horribly bad date but should have. The whole time I was there, I was running in the back of my head what I should do. How I should get the eff outta there. These days I come equipped. Edited August 26, 2010 by Gallaxia
Green Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Dating on the internet is just a bad idea for men. The Fat ugly girl who puts up deceptive pictures/descriptions is an epidemic. Plus internet dating is just harder on men then real life dating. The only reason it exists is the internet works as a screen allow some guys to avoid their fear of rejection.
dispatch3d Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Personally, I believe your friend acted like a bit of an ass. I understand feeling the no attraction thing instantly, prob most of us have been there, but if it was SOLELY about the 30 lbs, well, a person can lose that in 6 weeks, but your friend may still be a shallow *******.... it takes longer than 6 weeks to lose 30 lbs. She lied. End of date. He doesn't owe her anything.
Gallaxia Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 it takes longer than 6 weeks to lose 30 lbs. She lied. End of date. He doesn't owe her anything. True. "So how'd you guys meet?" "Well, they were smaller/larger/more unkempt than they let on. But I thought, you know what? What's the worst that could happen from dating a liar?" You're only prolonging the inevitable.
Sphere Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 I agree your friend needs to be more of a gentleman. I agree with you, he is a total moron. I would have waited until the end of the date and then just said "I can't see this going anywhere, all the best for the future" and left it at that. I have only ever walked out of a date once was when this girl who clearly hadn't gotten over her ex-boyfriend started going on about him endlessly and outcome all the bitterness of a thousands nuns. I didn't bother seeing all of the art exhibition, I gave her money for a taxi home and I left abruptly.
TaurusTerp Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 I agree with you, he is a total moron. I would have waited until the end of the date and then just said "I can't see this going anywhere, all the best for the future" and left it at that. I have only ever walked out of a date once was when this girl who clearly hadn't gotten over her ex-boyfriend started going on about him endlessly and outcome all the bitterness of a thousands nuns. I didn't bother seeing all of the art exhibition, I gave her money for a taxi home and I left abruptly. Whats the point of wasting both your time and sitting through a whole date? Sounds like the moron is the one gritting his or her teeth and sitting there.
Gallaxia Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 So class and respect for a fellow human being go out the window? Lemme tell you, if I have any control over my karma,I'm gonna set myself up for some 'good'. You always get back what you give...
NYCGirly Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 One of the guys I met via online dating showed up looking at least :lmao:30lbs heavier than his picture. He was borderline obese and he has put "average" in his profile. I didn't walk out as I felt it was rude to do so. I have only walked out on a date once. I met a guy online that when we met up gave me a really creepy vibe. There was something off about him that I couldn't quite put my finger on. I felt like I could be in danger. I am not sure how accurate my perception was - but I decided not to risk it. I excused myself to go to the toilet and then went for the nearest exit. I ended up running home (not walking) from the restaurant. :lmao: oh man I'm dying in my office at this one. As for me, yes I've been a victim of the manipulative profiles. Dude was a good 20-30lbs overweight. He claimed he was "muscular". Yeah pal, I'm sure you and your double chin exercise everyday. I was disappointed, yes, but I didn't up and leave. All I lost was a few hours of my time. No biggie. I even insisted on paying my share of the meal since I knew I would never see him again but he was nice enough to pay. Op, your friend definitely pulled a douche move. But considering he probably would've had to pay for the date maybe it wasn't such a bad idea to just leave. He should've just gone about it nicer.
2sure Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Eh, it happens. Men & women LIE about their weight, their jobs, their baggage, their mental health. And you dont get an inkiling of it until you have put time aside to meet them, invested a couple of phone calls and interest. Big deal. You dont walk out, you chalk it up. Ive walked out on a few dates but only if they were completely offensive or rude.
TaurusTerp Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 So class and respect for a fellow human being go out the window? Lemme tell you, if I have any control over my karma,I'm gonna set myself up for some 'good'. You always get back what you give... If someone doesnt have the courtesy to be truthful to me and wastes my time, why am I obligated to waste both our time with a date that is going nowhere?
TaurusTerp Posted August 26, 2010 Posted August 26, 2010 Eh, it happens. Men & women LIE about their weight, their jobs, their baggage, their mental health. And you dont get an inkiling of it until you have put time aside to meet them, invested a couple of phone calls and interest. Big deal. You dont walk out, you chalk it up. Ive walked out on a few dates but only if they were completely offensive or rude. If everyone walked out on people who egregiously lied in their profiles, nobody would lie anymore. Problem solved. Viva la revolucion.
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