He gets the milk for free...

[marsle85]

But he is trying to buy the cow?

 

You've heard the story: a few friends are at a party, when they spot an unknowing target. Sure, they're attractive, sure they have a good personality... but something about them makes them unobtainable, and unique. Anyway, the friends make a wager- whoever wins the target, wins the bet.

 

This is what happened with my friends a year ago. My friend and I spotted this guy- tall, dark, handsome... the whole package. He's built without being muscly, thick without losing a great physique and figure, nice full lips, scruffy but still clean, purposeful. He had an indie-hippie style, relaxed, sexy. He unknowingly sat, one hand drawing his blunt up to his lips to take a hit, the other lazily gripping a bottle of Jack; as Maria and I snuck glances from behind people at the party.

 

"Do you see that-" I started

"So. ****ing. Hot." Mariya finished.

"I want him" I challenged

"so do I, you bitch" she playfully quipped.

 

Maria and I have been friends since before middle school, a guy would never get between us, the bet was all in good fun... but we both smoothed out our dresses, and fixed our makeup before going any further in the party. My memories of the night are sporadic, as I was rather drunk. I'll share what I remember:

 

She approached him first, I saw her eyes flicker up at me as they joked around. I was grinning ear to ear.

 

I was in the kitchen making a drink when he came in. I said nothing, pouring another shot or two of vodka into my cup. I felt his dark, heavy eyes on me as I stirred in cranberry juice. He leaned over, grabbed two shot glasses and looked at me and said: "shot of Jack?" I peered over my shoulders, smiled and accepted. We took our shot, I thanked him and left him in the kitchen.

 

Somehow he was involved in our group of friends, we all walked a few streets down to another party. Maria and I walked, arm in arm when I mentioned how thirsty I was. He told us to hold on, ran a few cars down and grabbed me a bottle of water. Nice guy.

 

At the second party, he asked if I wanted to play pong... uh oh, who were we facing? Maria and some other guy.

 

As the house started to fall asleep, Mr. oh-oh-so-sexy and I lounged on the couch, smoking a little and taking swigs of his Jack. And he didn't even lean in to kiss me before he was kneading the flesh of my thighs with his strong, powerful hands. I looked at him smiling, and then he kissed me.

 

We stayed up until 7am the next morning, kissing and playing and touching. He was an ass man, which I was why I reason I won the bet. Maria is taller, darker, swankier. I was surprised even, he seemed so cliche and exclusive... One of those guys that wears clothes that look worn, but were expensive? Even the way he talked: low, sexy, deep. I didn't sleep much at all, even after trying. I don't sleep well with guys i'm romantically/sexually interested... maybe i'm uncomfortable, whatever. When a hand roams across my hip? I'm awake. But I relished every second.

 

The next morning I had to go to work. I threw on my suit, lifeguard tank and started to pack my things. I thought he was sleeping, but when I stood- he playfully smacked my butt, still laying in bed. I laughed it off, drifting back into reality and asking myself what had happened. We didn't have sex, but I remember he had introduced anal play (which I was new to) and I remembered how foreign and exciting he was. We kissed hard, and I observed my victory- languidly sprawled naked on the sheets infront of me. Golden, taunt, sort of graceful in a masculine way. One of those perfect bodies. And then I left smiling.

 

First thing I do is call Maria and spill everything. "I can't believe you let him put a finger in your butt" was the first thing she responded after I told her everything. I shrugged it off, and gave her my opinion on the matter. Eh, wasn't so bad. She was jealous, incredibly jealous and we laughed about the sequence of events over the progression of the night.

 

It's 2pm, i'm at work when I get a text. "Get home okay?" I ask who it is. It's him. What?. We text back and forth, and I literally don't think anything of it. Everything about him was a big joke, for fun- I am not expecting, nor do I want a relationship with a pothead. But he's nice, and texted me randomly for the next year. We'd meet up at parties a few times, and would enjoy a nice hookup. It was crazy to me that me and this guy kept in contact. What an ego boost. A few months of texting and then he was dating some girl, couldn't meet up- in his words: "was going to try to make it work". I congratulated him and meant it. I imagined him with some gorgeous, dark haired twin of him- except female (blatantly female) and just as purposely nonchalant and charmingly chill as him.

 

It was my 21st birthday last week. I texted him the night before (drunk) asking if he'd swing by and give me a birthday kiss the next night. We chatted back and forth, as we hadn't seen eachother for over 6 months. He must have been done with his girl, because he responded that he'd love to.

 

On the night of my 21st, I remember meeting him outside- and being very drunk and happy. We talked and I remember thinking "oh goshh, he is so so much more attractive than I remember. We made out, and it was a perfect transition into my night. I returned to the bar, celebrated some more- and even received some nice texts from him.

 

Firstly, asking if I'd like to see him again and secondly that I looked really, really adorable. I drunkenly texted back that I couldn't stop thinking about him (4am).

 

Morning hits, I smiled proudly apon remembering our sexy makeout outside the bar, and threw those memories into my "no drama, all fun" box and carried on my day. He responds to my LAST text (yikes!) at 11 in the morning saying the feeling was mutual. I look at it and crack up to my friends, reliving the moments and do not respond. I mean... the feeling really ISN'T mutual. What do you know, 2pm that day- he texts again saying happy birthday- and that we really should hang out.

 

Now, I've seen this text once before. Last year he asked me to hang out, and I dutifully asked him "what he has in mind"... AKA- let's find out what really is on your mind. He responds "oh, just the usual..." etc. And I know what that means, not that I had a problem with it--- I just have get the deal straight. Once again, in 2010- I ask "Yeah! What do you have in mind?" And suddenly he wants to fill me in on the details, and it involves picking me up, and taking me somewhere. What?

 

I'm going with the flow, kind of unsure-- especially because I find out he has dropped pot, dropped drinking and is going to a very good campus in the area. Now he's not just hot, he's getting his stuff together. Anyway, we go to the fair the other night- and then the beach after. We kiss a little, and it's just as nice as I remember. We end up at my house, and we're kissing and I'm sober. He's squeezing me and being gentle, and sweet and I'm staring... sober. I can go on a date, I can make out with a guy who is into me, but I'm getting my worlds confused. I'm not familiar with a guy trying to buy the cow, when he's gotten the milk for free. I was NEVER looking to date him, I didn't think he WAS dateable. Now everything is different, he is genuinely nice, and we have talked every day. He sends me stupid picture messages, messages with smileys and it's just nice. AND hooking up was better than it EVER was drunk. I swear he uses his whole body when he kisses me. Nothing is untouched, not massaged, not caressed. But underneath the fervent passion and pulls and pushes, I swear there is something. He kisses me goodbye, and tells me he had a good time. He leaves, and I sit on my couch staring.

 

What is going on?

I can't help but feel I need to snap out of this, things just don't happen like this. Relationships don't build out of a hookup, it's just not logical. It's been one date.

 

He texts me the next day: He had a lot of fun with me and left his necklace (a leather one, go figure) in my couch. Can I grab it for him? We chat later, stupid stuff. We talk today, he askes how "our fish are" that we won at the fair.

 

Can the worlds really collide?

I'm not going headlong. I won't be stupid here, I'm not expecting anything, and he's the type of guy who I could be friends-- even after everything. But I've been thinking about him when I go to bed, which seems unnatural... but hello? I've slept with him already.

 

Can this work?

[spookie]

Yah, why can't it work?

 

I don't get it. You're not a cow....

[kalikula]

Not to be snippy but this entry is written in a bit of an annoying way.

 

Just take it slow, you've only had one date. Just enjoy it and see where it leads... :-)

 

I am of the opinion that some relationships can come out of hookups. Some guys would never date girls they've hooked up with, but other guys don't see anything wrong with hanging out/hooking up for awhile and eventually getting together. I think girls are usually more flexible either way. (I definitely am).

[xpaperxcutx]

ha, Marsle, I thought you were becoming Goldpile there for a second...

 

Honestly, I think because you haven't came across a situation such as this one, you're not entirely sure that it's completely believable. I'm not saying it's impossible, but it does seem like this guy is making an effort to backtrack on the whole hookup to really try to " date" you. The question is do you want to step out of the playing field to make an effort with him, or just let him go?

[Star Gazer]

Marsle, he's not trying to buy the cow. It's been one date. Plus, he hasn't gotten the milk yet. It's not as backwards as you think.

[Hot Carl]

I'm off to the gym, so no time to read the original post. But milk doesn't really cost that much, so I'd be wary of a guy who is always trying to get it for free. Either he as serious cash flow problems or it's some kind of freaky fetish.

[spookie]

I think there's a certain category of men (over-represented on LS) who will hook up with a girl only to turn around and disqualify her for a relationship on the basis that she must be a slut.

 

But for the majority of guys, it isn't a deal maker or breaker. Whether it works out is not based on how fast you have sex. It usually doesn't work out with these guys because most relationships don't work out. Not because he won't buy the cow.

 

At least a large minority of relationships (mine included) start like this.

[xpaperxcutx]

I'm off to the gym, so no time to read the original post. But milk doesn't really cost that much, so I'd be wary of a guy who is always trying to get it for free. Either he as serious cash flow problems or it's some kind of freaky fetish.

 

I believe the correct term would be mammary/breast fetish... seeing as milk comes out of that area... and stuff

[WintersNightTraveler]

Have you really just turned 21? You always struck me as mid twenties for some reason. Perhaps I just read too much into your username and contrasted you to other teenage posters' writing styles.

 

Given the way it was written, and that I thought you were older, I first thought it was a story, rather than a post asking advice. In which case a well done draft of a sexy story, bravo! Although I'm not sure what "cliche and exclusive" means.

 

But if this is actually asking, then I think you should give it a whirl if you are feeling it, and also try to let go of some of your preconceptions about how dating "should" work. Good luck.

[tigressA]

I was/am in a situation similar to this, marsle; the only thing I will say is--don't. go. backward. You've already slept with him. Don't suggest backtracking from that, and don't agree if he suggests it. Just have fun and see where things go.

[Mme. Chaucer]

I think you are swept away by romanticism, but it isn't the first time that people have met at a party, engaged in what used to be called "heavy petting," and went on to date. Heck, when I was in high school that was the norm.

 

No milk was actually had, and no cow is being purchased at this point.

 

You've gone on a date with a guy you made out drunkenly with. He's a god. Have fun!

[Star Gazer]

But for the majority of guys, it isn't a deal maker or breaker.

 

I couldn't disagree more. For most guys I know, if you hookup on the first date you're ruled out as GF material.

[Lady vs Panda]

I think there's a certain category of men (over-represented on LS) who will hook up with a girl only to turn around and disqualify her for a relationship on the basis that she must be a slut.

 

But for the majority of guys, it isn't a deal maker or breaker. Whether it works out is not based on how fast you have sex. It usually doesn't work out with these guys because most relationships don't work out. Not because he won't buy the cow.

 

At least a large minority of relationships (mine included) start like this.

 

Agreed.

 

I have had a couple attempts at flings/ONS that turned into longer, more meaningful relationships. Doesn't seem particularly weird to me. Not everybody is as gung-ho about labeling people and relationships as a lot of LSers are.

[AverageJoe]

But milk doesn't really cost that much

 

It is about $8.99 a gallon in Hawaii last time I was there. Some completely useless info for the day.

 

 

Pardon the intrusion, carry on.

[WintersNightTraveler]

I think you are swept away by romanticism, but it isn't the first time that people have met at a party, engaged in what used to be called "heavy petting," and went on to date. Heck, when I was in high school that was the norm.

 

No milk was actually had, and no cow is being purchased at this point.

 

You've gone on a date with a guy you made out drunkenly with. He's a god. Have fun!

 

No she hooked up with him on and off for the course of a year ("texted me randomly for the next year. We'd meet up at parties a few times, and would enjoy a nice hookup"). I sense they went beyond 1st base since they're talking about anal play...

[spookie]

I couldn't disagree more. For most guys I know, if you hookup on the first date you're ruled out as GF material.

 

 

You must know an awful lot of hypocrites then.

[Mme. Chaucer]

No she hooked up with him on and off for the course of a year ("texted me randomly for the next year. We'd meet up at parties a few times, and would enjoy a nice hookup"). I sense they went beyond 1st base since they're talking about anal play...

 

Riiiight. I got kinda lost in the "creative writing" aspect of the op.

 

I must point out though that the "anal play" took place at the first make-out petting fest when full out sex did not.

 

I'm old; I can't keep up with the sex trends of today's youth ... but I still know plenty of people who got together after an early sexual liaison.

[spookie]

With my bf it went:

 

-drunken make-out

-hanging out w/ friends

-date

-hanging out again

-sex

 

So, sex before Date 2.

 

I wouldn't recommend putting out so early because I DID stress out before he called to ask me out again wondering whether or not I'd screwed up, but we continued dating so obviously it was fine.

[Star Gazer]

You must know an awful lot of hypocrites then.

 

Nope. Their thought process goes something like this, "I really want to have sex with her tonight (on the first date), but I really hope even more that she doesn't give it to me because I won't be able to look at her the same way."

 

They may end up with a GF, but certainly won't think of her as wife material...and that's what most guys I know are looking for.

[Jilly Bean]

I couldn't disagree more. For most guys I know, if you hookup on the first date you're ruled out as GF material.

 

What if you just throw yourself at him at a party, in order to "win" him over your BFF in some type of competition, and he sticks his finger in your ass in order to tell his friends that he was able to poke a strange drunk chick at a party in the butt? lol

 

Does that rule you out?

 

I guess I don't see how he has made any intentions known that he wants to legitimately date her, either. Seems like he's booty calling still, or FWB.

 

(And do knock off the Literotica 101 writing, Marsle).

[WintersNightTraveler]

Riiiight. I got kinda lost in the "creative writing" aspect of the op.

 

Yeah me too actually. I'm still not 100% sure I know what the hell is going on. But I'm sure marsle will be back to clear it up.

[spookie]

What if you just throw yourself at him at a party, in order to "win" him over your BFF in some type of competition, and he sticks his finger in your ass in order to tell his friends that he was able to poke a strange drunk chick at a party in the butt? lol

 

Does that rule you out?

 

I guess I don't see how he has made any intentions known that he wants to legitimately date her, either. Seems like he's booty calling still, or FWB.

 

(And do knock off the Literotica 101 writing, Marsle).

 

Meh still disagree.

 

I won't say "most" but many guys are much more open-minded than that.

 

My bf falls into this category as do many of my close male acquaintances.

[Stung]

I suppose there's a lot of gray area in my own situation, as I met him online while living in another state, and we spent months emailing and IMing, talking on the phone, before ever going on our first 'date.' But I slept with my now-husband on our first date. We were at a live music venue rubbing knees under the table, I looked into his eyes over the rims of our drinks and told him I would go home with him that night if he wanted me to--and he did want me to. The neighbors came by early the next morning to complain, we had spent the whole night making that headboard bounce . A few years later, we got married on the anniversary of that first date.

[Star Gazer]

I guess I don't see how he has made any intentions known that he wants to legitimately date her, either. Seems like he's booty calling still, or FWB.

 

Hence why I said I didn't think he was buying the cow, it's been one "date." That said, I don't think he's even gotten "the milk" yet. Maybe some other form of dairy...

[WintersNightTraveler]

I won't say "most" but many guys are much more open-minded than that.

 

LS is a land of extreme categorizations, and people claiming things are black and white...