sloudrou Posted August 4, 2010 Posted August 4, 2010 It's much different when I encounter people in the forum who have experinced similar situations. I don't think you can see things through the same perspective if you haven't been there yourself. .. And yet even those people weren't able to magically solve your problem for you, because if they were, you wouldn't be here posting about it now. Maybe you should think about that.
Author grampi Posted August 4, 2010 Author Posted August 4, 2010 .. And yet even those people weren't able to magically solve your problem for you, because if they were, you wouldn't be here posting about it now. Maybe you should think about that. So maybe they don't solve it, doesn't mean talking about it doesn't help....
sloudrou Posted August 4, 2010 Posted August 4, 2010 So maybe they don't solve it, doesn't mean talking about it doesn't help.... Yes it does, because you're still in the same position, even if you've satisfied your ego for a moment.
Author grampi Posted August 4, 2010 Author Posted August 4, 2010 Yes it does, because you're still in the same position, even if you've satisfied your ego for a moment. I'm guessing you're not a professional...you have a mean way of coming across...
sloudrou Posted August 4, 2010 Posted August 4, 2010 I'm guessing you're not a professional...you have a mean way of coming across... Did you expect to find a professional on a message board? If it bothers you so much, maybe you should stump up the cash to talk to a professional. They'll probably tell you exactly what I and the other posters in this thread have told you, albeit with slightly different wording.
Author grampi Posted August 4, 2010 Author Posted August 4, 2010 Did you expect to find a professional on a message board? If it bothers you so much, maybe you should stump up the cash to talk to a professional. They'll probably tell you exactly what I and the other posters in this thread have told you, albeit with slightly different wording. No, but I do expect to carry on an adult conversation, which can be done without all the brashness and name calling.
You Go Girl Posted August 4, 2010 Posted August 4, 2010 Just put this past lover in perspective. She isn't your wife, you don't have years invested in her, she's not the mother of your children, she doesn't cook your dinner, she's not going to be there for you should you find you have cancer next week. See? How easy was that! There's a person at home that cares for you and takes care of you, and you should take care of her. Bottom line. The old flame is a sweet story of days of yore, and recognize it as such as place value on it only as such. Keep it light on facebook with this woman, stay away from the innuendos, the flirtations, etc. Remind her that you are married and devoted if need be, to keep her in line. Just do it in that subtle way that dedicated married men do; they comment about their wife, praise their wife, mention that they and their wife are going to go do such and such an outing...that's all it takes. If the OW is after you, praising your wife will make her take off and seek more available men.
Author grampi Posted August 4, 2010 Author Posted August 4, 2010 Just put this past lover in perspective. She isn't your wife, you don't have years invested in her, she's not the mother of your children, she doesn't cook your dinner, she's not going to be there for you should you find you have cancer next week. See? How easy was that! There's a person at home that cares for you and takes care of you, and you should take care of her. Bottom line. The old flame is a sweet story of days of yore, and recognize it as such as place value on it only as such. Keep it light on facebook with this woman, stay away from the innuendos, the flirtations, etc. Remind her that you are married and devoted if need be, to keep her in line. Just do it in that subtle way that dedicated married men do; they comment about their wife, praise their wife, mention that they and their wife are going to go do such and such an outing...that's all it takes. If the OW is after you, praising your wife will make her take off and seek more available men. Now THAT's some good feedback! Sloudrou could take some advice giving lessons from you!
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