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With my boyfriend, but met someone new.


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Posted
girls with boyfriends who aren't that into them flirt WAY more than single girls. In fact, if I REALLY hit it off with a girl in <2 minutes I KNOW she has a boyfriend. It's like 90%+ chance this is true. I can't even explain the why's.

I never thought about this, but I think you're right. In the relationship of mine in which I felt the least appreciated and adored, I felt a stronger urge to flirt with other men than I ever had, even when single! By contrast, when in secure relationships in which I felt loved and appreciated, other men might as well have been women for all the interest I had in them. I guess that was my instincts' way of telling me I was with the wrong guy.

Posted
I never thought about this, but I think you're right. In the relationship of mine in which I felt the least appreciated and adored, I felt a stronger urge to flirt with other men than I ever had, even when single! By contrast, when in secure relationships in which I felt loved and appreciated, other men might as well have been women for all the interest I had in them. I guess that was my instincts' way of telling me I was with the wrong guy.

 

I mean I've always assumed it wasn't a conscious thing. These women aren't doing it on purpose. They just flirt more out of instinct. I pickup on it really fast now lol. Maybe it's the fact you have unmet needs - not enough male attention/caring/appreciation - so you seek it outside of the relationship?

Posted
Maybe it's the fact you have unmet needs - not enough male attention/caring/appreciation - so you seek it outside of the relationship?

Totally. Makes perfect sense.

Posted

Might as well dump your BF...sounds like you are going to cheat sooner or later

Posted (edited)
I really WORK at the relationship which is why I'm already thinking about this new guy.

 

Diezel's post is pretty harsh, but rings true.

 

I'm perpetually amazed at the lengths people go to rationalize problems in their existing relationship out of thin air when faced with tempting greener grass. OP's post is packed full of such rationalizations. People such as your BF can sense when they aren't getting someone's full attention, and when others are in the picture. It's not surprising at all how he is reacting to this, he knows exactly what he is dealing with in you.

 

OP, you have already cheated on your BF, break up with him for his sake, then grow up, cultivate some character, and stop rationalizing away aspects of your bad behavior that make your conscience uncomfortable for your own sake.

Edited by meerkat stew
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