MyNameIsJonas Posted July 25, 2010 Posted July 25, 2010 I want to throw a spike into this back and forth between the OP and zengirl because it's hitting the point of counter productivity. In a nutshell OP, I think you are over-thinking everything about your situation. I know from personal experience that if you over-think, all of your assumptions turn into self-furfilling prophesies. It appears that you don't want any of that to happen so stop over-thinking. It sounds easier said than done but it is that simple. I also disagree with the majority of the posters on this thread: I do not believe you need therapy. Overthinking is not a disorder or a disease and I wasted almost $1K on therapists before I figured this out. This may sound very simple to the point where it may sound crazy but try this: write down everything you have noticed about your relationship with this girl thus far. Then categorize everything you have written as either a fact or a personal opinion/interpretation. The results will shock you.
zengirl Posted July 25, 2010 Posted July 25, 2010 I want to throw a spike into this back and forth between the OP and zengirl because it's hitting the point of counter productivity. In a nutshell OP, I think you are over-thinking everything about your situation. I know from personal experience that if you over-think, all of your assumptions turn into self-furfilling prophesies. It appears that you don't want any of that to happen so stop over-thinking. It sounds easier said than done but it is that simple. I also disagree with the majority of the posters on this thread: I do not believe you need therapy. Overthinking is not a disorder or a disease and I wasted almost $1K on therapists before I figured this out. This may sound very simple to the point where it may sound crazy but try this: write down everything you have noticed about your relationship with this girl thus far. Then categorize everything you have written as either a fact or a personal opinion/interpretation. The results will shock you. For the most part, I agree with you. I've never had therapy, personally. I've found my own "forms" of it. I don't think therapy can hurt, and I think it can be a starting point. Overthinking is part of the human condition, but anyone can stop anytime they truly want. Just takes vigilance. Therapy helps some people.
Author collegeguy_24 Posted July 25, 2010 Author Posted July 25, 2010 I will try that list thing that was suggested by MyNameIsJonas. Also I will look into the student counciling center on our college campus, since I can't afford any other means. I won't see one yet, but it doesn't hurt to see what options are out there. I have tried to stop over thinking, and at one point in our relationship I had had success, up until the blow out. Then it came back. I know I can do it, but its just so hard, I need more distractions as that usually helps. I do know that after the blow out, I didn't overthink, I just gave her the space she wanted until she wanted to talk again. And it helped I went shopping for work to distract me for the weekend. after the weekend. which is when she wanted forgiveness, I didn't start to overthink till she went out with that guy. Thats where it started.
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