Why are black women left out of the interracial dating game too?

[mental_traveller]

Originally posted by alphamale

how can u say that with a straigt face, MENTAL_TRAVELLER??? you know as well as i do that if you marry someone you marry everything about them. their family, culture, heritage, religion, background, credit rating, etc.....

 

Sure, but those things aren't determined by their race as much as by their individual circumstances. It varies from individual to individual. Besides, we're talking about dating here, not marriage.

[alphamale]

Originally posted by mental_traveller

Besides, we're talking about dating here, not marriage.

sure it does vary by individual. but for most people, esp when older, they are dating to get married.

 

if someone does not fit the right "mold" then usually they are excluded right away.

[trinity76]

Wow, what an interesting thread! I had to stop reading about page 3 but I think I get the general gist enough to reply. To answer the question, I only felt like I had the short end of the dating stick when I chose to date Black men exclusively! Here's why:

 

First, I am a Black woman who has never had a problem attracting any man. If I had a dollar for every White guy who gave me the eye I'd have a few hundred dollars at least. And I can't even walk down the street without a White woman commenting on how pretty I am (thanks to the parents I am not conceited). And no, I am not a lightskinned, white-looking girl, but I am tall and thin and confident.

 

Second, I think everyone in this discussion is conflating the "internal" discussion on Black women's marriage/dating prospects dwindling due to various issues with Black men...ONE of which is the rates at which they date/marry White women. This is not about Black women lamenting their unattractiveness to men outside of their own race...honestly, I don't know that most have given it a thought. It may be shocking to everyone except Black men, but most Black women don't want men who are not Black, White men in particular! I don't fault anyone for having their "type," but to the White men who have gone on and on about their lack of attraction to Black women, please understand that you are not at the top of the list for even the fat, "ghetto" Black women that you don't like.

 

It is part of the dominant white psyche to assume that everyone wants to be a part of it, when in fact most really do not want "in." I like men who are tall, masculine, brownskinned and dark-eyed (just like Daddy!). A pale, blondhaired, blue eyed man has to be on par with Brad Pitt before I'll give him a second look, and I'd take Jet Li over him if I was a short girl! I think Mediterranean (Italian, Spanish, Arab), Latino and Asian men are very goodlooking, if short. Sorry, I am tall so I look at that first. I have thought a lot about what I am attracted to, and it is certain facial features and height more than phenotype really.

 

I bet if most of us really thought about it we'd figure out that our racial preferences have been influenced by culture and personal experiences, not some inborn preference or ascribed racial pecking order.

 

Third, it is mostly a middle to upper class issue in the Black community - the lower class or "ghetto" types date Black mostly exclusively. My cousins (love em but they are a lil ghetto LOL) wouldn't touch a White, Latino, or Asian man with a 10ft pole, but I definitely would date a man from any race/ethnic group if he met my standards. The only reason it comes up is because as a Black person, the more educated, wealthy, and/or successful you become, the more likely you are to encounter people from different races with whom you have more in common. This can be unsettling if you have been raised to stick to your own kind, as I was.

 

Fourth, and related to the point about sticking to your own, every Black woman I know has been approached by a non-Black man or 15 and rebuffed their advances. I used to as well - I was "holding out" for my Black Prince Charming. The older I got, and the more I realized that love/attraction is a very personal and individual experience between two people and decided to open my mind and heart. If there were no racism, our natural attraction to whatever would probably be based on non-racial markers. Look at children - they like who they like until someone tells them otherwise, or they have a negative experience.

 

Last, it does take a strong man to deal with the typical Black woman. Hell, even most Black men can't handle us sometimes! All women are strong and vulnerable at the same time, but Black women only show their vulnerability once they know you can be trusted. Strength and femininity are 2 different things. Men in general seem to be intimidated by women who are smart, educated, worldly, and independent. The smart ones know that even these women want a man they can lean on when the going gets rough, and prize these women for what they bring to the table.

[LexiB]

You hit the nail on the head on so many issues. I especially commend you for pointing out:

 

Originally posted by trinity76

And no, I am not a lightskinned, white-looking girl, but I am tall and thin and confident.

 

Not there is anything at all wrong with looking this way, but it's so sad that I've noticed a few black women on this thread basically saying that they can get any man BECAUSE they are mixed/don't have "black features" wtf And that's just ridiculous. For me as well, there is NO mistaking that I am Black and I have had a lot experience dating guys outside my race. Today even on my way to work in the city a white man--gasp (sarcasm ) stopped me to try and flirt w/ me. I say "try" b/c it didn't work but not because he was white, he just wasn't my type.

 

Anyway, i'm done with my mini rant. Just wanna say Thanx again Trinty for an awesome post.

 

Lexi

 

OH! One more thing...

 

]Originally posted by trinity76 but to the White men who have gone on and on about their lack of attraction to Black women, please understand that you are not at the top of the list for even the fat, "ghetto" Black women that you don't like. .

 

Amen to that!!

[trinity76]

Girl you are welcome. Somebody apparently forgot to send the memo to A LOT of men out here who find dark brown women especially attractive. My ex, who is *gasp* Black, wouldn't date anyone lighter than Sanaa Lanthan. It really doesn't matter, and a lot of this sounds like "hey look at me I am sooooo cute," but I wanted to correct the perception that Black women are crying themselves to sleep because some White men aren't attracted.

[LexiB]

Exactly. This isn't a conceit thing. Just trying to point out that being black as a woman doesn't mean you're doomed to singlehood or to have to settle for whatever scraps happen to get thrown your way.

 

Pleeeze.

 

Women of all races are beautiful and have alot to offer. Yes....even the black girls

[Ebony-N-ivory]

Hey all!!!!! I'm new here!!!! I just had a quick comment on black women being with non- black men. I believe that the main reason is that non- black men feel intimidated by us. My boyfriend is white (I'm black) and we actually had this discussion one night. He is the first man that I have dated out of my own race, but I never excluded other races. Rather, I was never approached by anything but black men.

[Honeyglo]

we are not all ugly and ghetto...just some of us...just like not all white women are trailer trash and just like not all asian women are easy and strippers....see, so many stereotypes its embarrassing!

 

 

I am a black woman whose mother is of a mixed back

ground and a black father. I resent that statement as

well that ALL black people are from the ghetto. Many of

us grew up in a middle class area,graduated from

major universities,took piano lessons and etc.

 

As a black woman I have many men who approach

me here in California. Mainly white and East Indian for

some reason. I just got asked out from a Hispanic man

on this past week. I am always told that I am pretty.

 

Not that I live for the opinions of others, because NO ONE

should allow an opinion to determine how you feel about

yourself! Because my GOD said in Psalm 139 I believe

I am fearfully and wonderfully made!

 

The myths are still around I see. I mean if a black woman

has naturally long, or curly hair it is always assumed it

is a weave. Why? NO one ever comments on Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, or Christina for wearing weave

why? When it was the white woman who started the

hair weaving!! I mean goodness!!

 

Let GO OF THE MYTHS!!!

 

GOD BLESS YOU ALL,

 

 

Honeyglo

[ax13nw4]

I dated a black woman a few years ago, she was very attractive, educated and career oriented. The ONLY problem was with her brothers. She had 3 brothers, all of whom dated white women, but they were TOTALLY against their sister dating whites. I was threatened with a handgun in my face to break it off, or else! I don't know about any other white guys experiences, but I had a very bad one! She was cool, but her family definitely wasn't.

[guest]

To answer my own question, I don't think it is. I think that if a certain race has certain features physically, and those don't physically attract you, I don't see how that could offend someone, it's taking anti-discrimination to a radical extent. If you reject any girl, she just didn't meet your tastes, but if you reject a black girl, all of the sudden you are racist?

 

I also don't think the media has anything to do with it at all. I don't base my attractions off of what's sold to me. Additionally, I see TONS of black people in advertising, it seems that no programing exists without a black person "thrown in there", as if somehow some racist bumpkin from arkansas is going to see a black girl in a GAP ad and he'll see the light.

 

 

Hello, I understand what you're saying, but there actually is a predominantly European standard of beauty portrayed in the media. You're pretty if you're extremely skinny, light-complexioned, and have long flowing hair. You see it in commericals and movies and such. Let's face it, a white man would more likely choose vanessa williams over lauryn hill any day, and unfortunately some black guys would too. A lot of black women already "feel" unpretty already just looking at the television screen. Our esteem is constantly killed at every level by the media (not pretty enough, not smart enough, too independent...), so if some of us get a little emotional in this forum don't take it personally. by the way, I'm a black woman, if it matters...

 

And no, showing a black girl in a GAP ad wont reverse racism, but when will they ever show a black girl in a GAP ad or better yet, Abercrombie? There's obviously a certain image they want to present so it would probably never happen. When will they ever cast an asian man as a romantic lead in a film or TV show instead of just comic relief or a martial artist? You can't deny that the media DOES have influence on people, whether we want to admit it or not. And it heavily coincides with the disproportionate dating scene among the races. It's so evident. Is there really a solution for this? well, unlikely. It appears I'd have a better chance in finding a mate in Europe than here in the US. Even most of the white guys that have approached me in the US tended to be foreigners. At least, that's been my experience as well as my friends...

[PNW Blackchick]

Well, I won't try to speak for other black women, but THIS 44 y/o, overweight, big boned, and "ugly" black woman has never had a problem with getting white men to notice her! In fact, I've only had four black boyfriends in my life since I started dating at age 16. My first marriage was to a white man. This marriage lasted 9 1/2 years and we are still friends because we have a lovely 22 y/o daughter together. After the divorce and several years of being "alone" read not actively dating but rather parenting, working, studying at university and otherwise TCB, I met a wonderful man via the internet. He happens to also be a white man. We've been happily together 4 years. No we aren't the picture perfect couple (He's your standard Pacific Northwest tree hugging geriatric hippie, and I look a bit like a New Age version of Aunt Jemima, but he's kind and sweet and loves me enough to let me be ME and THAT is what truly matters...plus we share a common love of gardening and environmental issues).

 

For the record, I adore my brothas, but they have time and time again ignored me because I am not considered pretty in the fashion magazine sense...so my attitude has been if a guy of another race notices me, likes what he sees and asks me out, then why the hell not?

 

My point? ANY ONE can be in a relationship if they set their mind to it, and have the desire to meet someone... and yes, they can even get married if they wish. Fact: if a person is "chronically" alone...it is 9 time out of ten by CHOICE...or they are too damned picky!

 

It doesn't take stupendous looks and horrendous amounts of money to be in a successful relationship, just read the New York Times wedding section and that will bear this fact out. You see wedding notices and stories about brides of all races ranging from age 20 up to age 80, and they are NOT all supermodel gorgeous or thin.

 

A lot of black women are *NOT* in the I/R "game" because they do not open their minds to the possibilities, too many of them are looking for the 'perfect-in-the-eyes-of-their-peers-parents-society' kind of guy...but then so are a lot of women from all races.

 

To me, the women and men of today need to quit being so superficial and start looking at the heart of people. Once you do that, then you will find true love and companionship. This I know by personal experience.

[spicybrown]

Well, I won't try to speak for other black women, but THIS 44 y/o, overweight, big boned, and "ugly" black woman has never had a problem with getting white men to notice her! In fact, I've only had four black boyfriends in my life since I started dating at age 16. My first marriage was to a white man. This marriage lasted 9 1/2 years and we are still friends because we have a lovely 22 y/o daughter together. After the divorce and several years of being "alone" read not actively dating but rather parenting, working, studying at university and otherwise TCB, I met a wonderful man via the internet. He happens to also be a white man. We've been happily together 4 years. No we aren't the picture perfect couple (He's your standard Pacific Northwest tree hugging geriatric hippie, and I look a bit like a New Age version of Aunt Jemima, but he's kind and sweet and loves me enough to let me be ME and THAT is what truly matters...plus we share a common love of gardening and environmental issues).

 

For the record, I adore my brothas, but they have time and time again ignored me because I am not considered pretty in the fashion magazine sense...so my attitude has been if a guy of another race notices me, likes what he sees and asks me out, then why the hell not?

 

My point? ANY ONE can be in a relationship if they set their mind to it, and have the desire to meet someone... and yes, they can even get married if they wish. Fact: if a person is "chronically" alone...it is 9 time out of ten by CHOICE...or they are too damned picky!

 

It doesn't take stupendous looks and horrendous amounts of money to be in a successful relationship, just read the New York Times wedding section and that will bear this fact out. You see wedding notices and stories about brides of all races ranging from age 20 up to age 80, and they are NOT all supermodel gorgeous or thin.

 

A lot of black women are *NOT* in the I/R "game" because they do not open their minds to the possibilities, too many of them are looking for the 'perfect-in-the-eyes-of-their-peers-parents-society' kind of guy...but then so are a lot of women from all races.

 

To me, the women and men of today need to quit being so superficial and start looking at the heart of people. Once you do that, then you will find true love and companionship. This I know by personal experience.

I can honestly say that BW & AM are left out because half the people on this planet are full of $hit, and want somebody who is down for the okey-doke. BW and AM seem to want to preserve their culture. It's called decency. We are living in a world where we're blinded by the 'light', and are so simpleminded, that we have fallen slave to the myth of WW being the pinnacle of beauty. How do you define ugly? UGLY is an attitude, or a major physical deformation. So many WW, and other women die to look like Barbie. But Barbie was modeled after a German prostitute, ho-well....so much for standards. You can't compare an apple and an orange. Since television was invented 55 years ago, all you have seen was WW, or light women on it. DUH, a certain tupe of woman was truly beautiful, then, the media wouldn't have to pimp her image, in order for others to notice. From a BW perspective, WW are too bland, unless they put highlights in their hair, or have some type of cosmetic alteration. How else would you distinguish a man from a woman? Full sensuous lips, curves, hair that can be styled, other than a caveman/cousin it look all the time, be it fake or not, some type of flair in her personality. We are living in an age of terrorism, so who has the time to hurdle up in a corner, when confronted. Self-preservation is rule #1, so to be strong is a must, for all women. BTW if a man draws his manhood from a woman who is weak, then that tells me a whole lot about his 'man'-hood. A woman is supposed to be the backbone/strength. Plus, I tried that submissive-obedient, and it has only gotten me used, money taken away, bad credit, and as a BW in a WM world, youy'll have to come out fighting constantly, defend your honor.

[nobuteru]

Let's look at this a bit more objectively, shall we? Attraction (not love per se) is necessitated by the biological need/urge/instinct to reproduce and keep our species alive. We, humans, are one species. Inter-racial breeding is not inter-special breeding, like a zebra to a horse. Hence, a mixed child is not rendered sterile. Now, since attraction is a result of biological function, it really has very little to do with race, seeing as there really is nothing such as race. For example I have met many men who have definitely displayed a keen interest in women of other skin tones. The complicating variable is culture and perception of culture. The white man who can't stop eyeing the black woman who he finds biologically attractive does not approach said women because of the cultural (not racial) background he comes from and the perception his white culture has of black culture. Now, this perception is not necessarily one of hate, but it is one of fear. Hence, we have white men who are woefully intimidated by black women, white men who are afraid of approaching said black women for fear of social and cultural rejection and alienation. What you find consciously beautiful really has very little to do with physical sexual attraction or the need for sex. This is why we have the case of Hugh Grant sleeping with an admittedly ugly (i'm sorry) prostitute, Divine Brown, even though he had Elizabeth Hurley at home. People, in general, need and want sex. It's the biological instinct ingrained in our system to ensure we don't die out. Now, if beauty has nothing to do with it, why are black women getting shafted? Because of society and culture. If a black woman is raised in a predominantly white environment she will most like marry a white man. Why? Because this is the society and culture they know. They will probably find white men more beautiful (consciously and not necessarily more attractive) than black men. For example, most second generation nigerians in america end up marrying white people. Why? Because, in general, they are raised in white communities and have invibed this culture. In most cases an African marrying an African american has more desastrous results than an African marrying a white or an African american marrying a white. Why? Because of social and cultural differences. I would love to continue, but I really ought to study for my midterms.

[cestdesiree]

As a white guy, I will have to say that the 3 main reasons many men dont go for black women is

 

 

1. Many black women tend to be overweight, especially when they get older. Plus most men arent too fond of females with thick bones, thats why men love asian women

 

2. Many black women seem to act very masculine. Men want women who are strong but not women who are gonna be arm wrestling and fighting with them.

 

3. In terms of looks, majority of black women are in my opinion just flat out ugly. I have seen very few good looking black women and i live in new york city wheres theres plenty of black women. Most asian females i see are above average, and white / latino women are average, but most black women who look good are usually mixed with other ethnicities and just call themselves black.

If you knew anything about my culture, you would know that black women "Had" to learn to be strong for their own survival of being separated from their families and their men and raped like dogs by their white masters. Now please don't misunderstand me; I have learned to remember my history only to understand it. Strong ness in any woman does not make her any less feminine or "soft". But I totally can understand where a man could be threatened by that- especially if he has his own insecurities about his masculinity.

[bab]

I actually know more interracial couples where the woman is black than the guy. One of my friends has a black mom and an Indian dad. She's married to a white guy. Another of girl's dad was black and I think her mom was white, but she never talks about her...and she married a white guy too. (Ironically she used to date the other white guy that married the black/indian girl). Her boys are very white. When she's out with her kids and a white friend, everybody thinks the kids belong to her friends. Let me tell you, she's not excited about this!!

[head/heels]

but with a disclaimer...they must have the same characteristics as i would want in a mate of anycolor....white, black or green....

smart, funny, conversationalist, active, not too much booty in the drawls, no slang, educated, no kids, career oriented, and can drop down and get her eagle on, girl...

[zingzoo]

I am an Indian male who came to the US back in '94. I don't seem to have a preference when it comes to dating women. But given the "circles" I move in, I very rarely come across black women. The first time I asked a black woman out was at the work place when I was an intern at 19 years of age. Of course, she declined...because she was 49 (and really slender and attractive. Mmmm!) and seemed quite amused by me The next time I had a chance to date a black woman was several years later at the wedding of a black friend of mine. His cousin was very attractive but it didn't last long because she returned to Nigeria. Ever since then I haven't come across any black woman that I found attractive. All my coworkers (software consultants, programmers and management people) are white.

 

Even in college, when I took courses (and this is a downtown college in Boston) I rarely saw black girls in my computer science and distribution courses. And the few girls that I found attractive on campus were always hanging out with black guys, and I found it rather intimidating to even stare at them in an effort to capture their gaze. I have had decent success with dating White and Indian women although I have never dated other Asian or Latin women (yes, I would like to). But I am superficial when it comes to looks. I am definitely attracted to slender women so I have passed opportunities to date heavier women who have candidly displayed their interest in me. I think that I base my "tastes" on education and class (as in "classy") and on occasion I have been attracted to women who were not so slender but really dressed and carried themselves well. In other words, they exuded class (they were not rich or anything) which I found attractive.

 

Online dating and downtown (after work type) bars: I rarely see any black women there and I end up approaching white women (some of whom are attractive ). I have been to a few bars used primarily by latin/black folks but was quite intimidated since I am not a good dancer and you should see some of those guys (even the heavier folks) move!!

 

If black women do desire I/R exposure, perhaps they should go out and look for it...so guys like me can see them.

[Serenasailor98]

I was reading this thread and I must admit that I was fascinated by the topic and replies. I am new to this site and found it upon mistake and when I read the topic I just had to sign up and reply.

 

First of all let me start by saying while the topic was interesting it was a little inaccurate. I am a 25 year old black male who luuuuuuuves black women. I love from Vanessa Williams to Tomiko Frasier and all shades in between. From Halle Berry to Lauryn Hill. Do you know that there over 35 different shades of skin color amongst African Americans.

 

Let me start by giving you guys some statistics. Studies show that interracial dating is not that common among African Americans. About 85% of all interracial dating in this country occurs between White men and Asian women. The list goes like this from: The most likely people to date interracially are Whites first, Asian, Hispanics, then African Americans last. Some studies show the while 4% of Asian men date and marry interracially,

25% of Asian women date and marry interracially. While 4% of African American women date and marry interracially only 8% of Black men date and marry interracially. The gap is not that large. Some studies show that while 5% of Black women date and marry interracially only 9% of Black men date and marry interracially. Black men second to Asian men are the least likely of all men to date and marry interracially. There are a couple of studies that show that black women in some parts of the country actually do interracially date/marry more than black men.

 

I live here in Southern California about 10 minutes away from Hollywood. And I see all kinds of things, but I still am surprised to see an interracial couple especially between whites, and blacks. When I do see interracial couples between whites and black I see just as many Black women/White Men couples and Black men/ White Women couples. Some of these Black women are Fine as Hell, and some of these Black women lets just say that Thank Goodness they got themselves a white men Because me or no other Black man would touch that with a ten foot pole.

 

I used to live in Burbank,Ca. You might have heard of Burbank it is where the N.B.C studios are. Well, because of the studios Burbank is still an upper middle class predomonitely White community. There are alot of Hispanics, Asians, and Armenians that have moved in there but they live in certain sections of Burbank. There are very few blacks that live there if you see a black person walking the streets it usually because they work there. I have a good friend who is Hispanic who grew up there and all of his friends are white males. Two of his friends date Black women exclusively and some of his other friend have mess with black women in the past, but because of racism in the white community they could never tell there friends and families that they were seeing a black girl.

 

The reasons why black people are the least likely of all people to date and marry interracially has many reasons. Some of them are Socio-economics, and racism. One reason is Socio-economic reasons. Many people don't date and marry outside of there class. A white male who is a Harvard Graduate is not going to go to Bedford-Stiverson to date a black girl. He is more than likely going to date/marry a white girl who is also a I.V league grad. Second is because of racism. Whether you still want to believe it or not we still live in America and America is very racist, and recially segregated. And from some of the post on this board I can still see that racism is still very much alive in this country. A white person and a black person can spend much of there entire lives without coming into clost contact with one another.

 

Another reason is because of the African American culture. Black women are see as the backbone of our culture. While black men are given a little bit of lee-way Black women are still expected to stay at home and take care of the children, cook, clean, and still have time to take care of her black man. Black women are often times the bread-winners in the family. Also,because of the mass-media and centuries old sterotypes, there is still a negative stigma to being black in America. Black men are sterotyped and pigeon-holed as being lazy,stupid,violent,ciminals. Black women are seen as loud, obnoxiuos, bitchy, domineering, fat, unattractive, and are ofter over-sexualized by the media or de-sexualized.

 

Many black men that do interracially date do so for many different reasons. When African where brought here as slave we were told that we were sub-human, ugly, not worth of being treated like human beings, and Inferior, that is why we were destined to be slaves so we could be controlled by our superiors The White Man. Unfortunately, those same beliefs persist today. Many black men interracially date because they are truly in love with the non-black women. Some black men do it because they see the white woman (because of our white-controlled and dominated society) as the pinnacle of success and beauty. And if they can't get a white women they will get the next best thing or closes to it a hispanic, or asian women, because of there light skin, long straight hair, and keen features. The issues that we as African-Americans have are so deeply rooted it is SICK! Maybe, because of 250years of slavery, 100 years of legalized segregation and discrimination and the poverty and dispair that still permeates within our community. After all, now other ethnic group in this country had their heritage, language, and culture stolen from them. No other ethnic group in this country was told that if they practice their native religion and spoke their native language, that they would be executed or sold off into slavery away from their family and friends. Other ethnic groups such as Hispanics, and Asian were allowed to come into this country knowing there language and heritage, and allowed to intergrated into the American society. They didn't have to worry about starting schools, and learning how to read without being hung of the a tree or being ripped apart by white mobs.

 

I personally don't believe in interracial dating among African Americans. We need to learn to love and appreciate our own culture before we start to try to look at other cultures. I have to sisters both of whom are model and actress fine. They are my standards of beauty. And when I get a women I want them to look just like them. Not only that I want my children to be in the image of me. I don't think I can do that with a non-black women. When I look in my daughters eyes I want to see my mother who is the most beautiful woman in the world. And when I look in my sons eyes I want to see my father who is the most handsome man in the world. Now I can't speak for non-blacks but I hope and pray that all of my other black brother and sisters should want to do the same thing.

[honeybunch2k5]

It's not how many black men date white women, it's which ones. Black men with good education and money tend to marry non-black women or black women are mixed or who could pass for white like Dave Chapelle, Rick Fox(at one time Vanessa could pass for white), Wayne Brady, Taye Diggs. Where I live attractive black men date fat white women with blonde hair and/ or light eyes.

[fundamental]

The Cultural Image of the African-American Woman

 

http://northbysouth.kenyon.edu/2000/women/mammypage.htm

 

 

The American media developed several stereotypical images to counter usually latent fears of African American women. These images probably originated in Antebellum years to ease the minds of white people and keep them from believing that white men would be attracted to female slaves. In the post-war New South, the entry of African Americans into the work force compounded these fears. The three main images are the Mammy/Aunt Jemima image, the Sapphire image, and the Jezebel/bad-black-girl image. While other images have come and gone, these three have remained consistent throughout African American history. These stock images helped to remove the blame from white males in their sexual encounters with African American women by portraying these women as the sole instigators of any relations. All three images distort African American female sexuality, as they variously portray black women as either asexual (and therefore not a threat to the wives of white men) or as hypersexual and therefore the cause of any sexual encounter between the races.

Depicted as a domestic worker, the Mammy figure foreshadowed the Aunt Jemima figure and reinforced the notion that black women want to, and are suited for, work in white homes. To justify the role in which white society consigned blacks, media projections convinced whites that blacks were, in fact, content in their service. The Mammy was traditionally a large, dark African-American woman dressed in a calico dress with a bright do-rag on her head and a happy white smile on her face. She is submissive to her master or employer, but her outlets for aggressive behavior are African-American males, her mistress, and the white children of whom she takes care.

 

When she scolds "her" white family in a nurturing manner, she is tolerated and sometimes even heeded, but when she is "pushy" about it, she is scolded, mocked, and she usually pouts. Her exaggerated features also manifest the desires of whites to justify their harsh treatments of slaves and to portray them as satisfied and content to serve whites. Her exaggerated white teeth are reminiscent of Europeans' fascination with the strength of the teeth of their slaves, which to them signified health and endurance, and of the need of proponents of slavery to depict happy slaves. Her exaggerated breasts and buttocks act as symbols of maternal femininity and thereby lessen sexual threat.

 

The Sapphire figure appears in the character of that name played by Ernestine Wade on the "Amos and Andy" television show, although she extends further in the past than that show. Sapphire is stout, medium to dark brown, headstrong and opinionated and usually not taken seriously by African-American males, but she usually has a female counterpart who allies with her.

She requires a male to fulfill her image and she asserts her personality by attempting to expose the immorality of the African-American male through cunning, thereby exposing her own virtues. The Sapphire image is a comfort to whites because she is not sexual and because she is not often taken seriously even by members of her own race because of her constant "runnin' at the mouth."

The Jezebel/bad-black-girl image is portrayed by a thin fair complected black female with thin lips, a thin nose, and long straight hair. She conforms to the American, not African, standard of beauty. Jezebel is seductive, and fulfills the white concept of sexuality but is more street-wise than a white girl. She plays on the white notion of the hypersexuality of the black female, and in doing so attracts the blame for any sexual relationship she might have with a white man. White comfort level was assaulted by a sexual relationship between a black woman and a white man, and so needed to know that it was the woman who initiated the contact. They needed some explanation as to why a white man would seek companionship in an African-American woman, and so created an image of a black woman with an unsatiable sexual appetite.

 

African-American women posed a major threat to white society, and this threat is reflected in the media's masculinization of them. The empowering characteristics that are a threat to those (whites) in power of these women are negatively exaggerated, so they masculinize themselves and, in comparison, emasculate the black male.

[Matter Domina]

To tell you the truth most black women but not all usually don't like white man and other non blacks. They usually prefer black men and are the least attracted to asians. Of course thats a generalization because a growing number of sisters are dating outside the race due to frustration with brothers but for the most part its black men that do alot of the interracial mixing. Its not that non black men don't like black women although alot of them have some racist ideology but they also have much love and respect for their own race and culture and feel no need to date outside their race unless its up meaning white to them.

[Serenasailor98]

I also wanted to reply that I think that it is funny. But you mentioned Tyra Banks, Vanessa Williams, and Beyonce. With all of the money, success, and beauty that those women have they themselves DON'T date/marry interracially. Also, I really don't know very many black women who are attracted to non-black men. And most black women would not even consider dating and marrying a white man of all.

 

Many black women don't see white men has being masculine enough. Some of the black women I know have even discribed white men as being almost effiminate. And as far as a Hispanic or Asian man they tend to to smaller framed and not as tall and muscular as black men. Also, when I lived in Miami which is very diverse. I saw more black women with white/Hispanic men than I saw vice-versa.

[Matt J.]

I dont know what its like anywhere else, but here in Atlanta there is no shortage of extremely attractive black women. Most of them are highly educated and have well paying jobs, too.

 

I also dont understand the 'masculine' and 'black women dont like white men' comments, because I've found the opposite to be true. Actually, at least here in Atlanta, the white women are quite stuck up. The black women are easier going and will actually give you the time of day.

 

Maybe it just depends on where you live.

[fundamental]

Some of the black women I know have even discribed white men as being almost effiminate. And as far as a Hispanic or Asian man they tend to to smaller framed and not as tall and muscular as black men. :

 

This is a stereotype as well.

[Vision]

In NYC, there are a lot of good looking black women. When do ever see any of these women with black men? Almost never. Even though it seems that white men and men of other races find 'most black women' unattractive, the ones that they do find attractive they go for. The sad thing is these women readily take on to any old man because he's outside of her race, and feel better for it. Yet they avoid, in most cases, men of their own race not realizing that most of the men they're with believe them to be inferior they're just making exceptions for them because of their clear superiority to any woman those men could ever dream of getting in their own race. I guess we haven't moved too far from slavery when all the beautiful black women stayed in the houses of the white masters for...