Mimolicious Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I can appreciate you might have rapport with him, but you gotta admit there are better ways of saying that. Uhm, so beat the guy to a pulp with insults until you hit his breaking point simply because he shows to have a high tolerance level? C'mon we are above that aren't we? I think the best lesson he can learn on his own, if the surgery is not the answer to his problems, and spending 12K of borrowed money goes down the tubes, is that he will find in his own way on his own journey a way to make sense of what life is giving him. OR he could just get the added confidence boost that he seeks to get what he feels he is missing out on. I really don't see how people can put him down for trying to make himself feel better. Yes, I a agree and pardon my choice of words. OpenGL really 's me off when he just goes on these "self bashing breakdowns". He thinks he's a midget at 5'7. I seriously want to slap him!!! LOL! Do this- Buy a one-way ticket to the Dominican Republic. They will def love you there. Even if it's for the greencard but beats the loving you just for the looks. She will cook, clean, sex you, and give you children just for the exchange of escaping poverty. Win-win situation. Mme. suggested mail-in bride (which now they are email-in bride) a big business but usually from Russian (very expensive) DR is cheaper! You get more for your US Dollars. I'm just saying...
Rorschach Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 The biggest irony I see coming from most of the detractors is if I posted a thread called: "I'm 38 years old and never been married and am lonely" Everybody would come in and say it's my fault for not changing things while I am still young. I agree that is exactly what everybody would say. But the problem is the things you need to change are not your hair line and your chin, but your attitude and your expectations of how things should work.
LucreziaBorgia Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 OpenGL, what are your hopes for this operation? What do you think it will change in your life?
xpaperxcutx Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 OpenGL is concerned about staying anonymous. Can't blame him for that. However - OpenGL - you could just put a black bar over your eyes, like on the mug pictures in TV. Think about the Tri-stuff. X-Terra has a Memorial day blow-out on wetsuits. They're 50% off! L_G I understand the need for anonymity but it's hardly fair for us to comment of advise towards anything unless we saw the full ' pictures" of things. Not that I'm going to badger him about it, but it has been brought by other members in previous threads about his looks and appearances. IF the advice comes off as venomous it's only because OpenGL has been on these threads since I've been here (approaching 2 months, I don't know when it started) complaining about the same things he's complaining about now while ignoring all the advice he's ever gotten about how the problem is between his ears. Months of having the same advice repeatedly ignored can make anybody a little venomous. Rorchach, I've been here long before you and was one of the many who has followed his threads up until now. I understand most of people's frustrations about his threads, myself included, but sometimes you can't help but wince at some of the condescending tones being presented here. I do agree that most times, advices are dished out but pushed aside, but as far as venomous comments go, some of them were really unnecessary. I have nothing against those members, but I assume most advices should at least be sensible.
Mimolicious Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I weigh 140lb and can bench press about 245lb. I do have wide shoulders (obviously) but I wouldn't go as far as to say I look like a box. I know what you're talking about though. And I'm not all gross roided out. The reason why I want to try to save it is because I still have a lot of hair left and almost every woman says they prefer a guy with a lot of hair and hate bald guys. There was a there on here only a few days ago that confirmed that. YOU SEE WHAT I AM SAYING!!!!!!!!??????? Who are all these women? You are setting up standards and living your life by from what a pool of people are saying? I don't give a rats-ass about hair on your head, as long as your head is buried... (let me leave that part out)
Lakeside_runner Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 L_G I understand the need for anonymity but it's hardly fair for us to comment of advise towards anything unless we saw the full ' pictures" of things. Not that I'm going to badger him about it, but it has been brought by other members in previous threads about his looks and appearances. I agree that a picture would be very very helpful. There are ways of posting a picture of oneself while remaining anonymous. Just put a black bar over your eyes...
IfWishesWereHorses Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 YOu are 5'7"??? Good grief, I thought you were like 5'2". 5'7" isn't tall, but it isn't debilitatingly short and there are tons of women who are shorter or even taller women that marry/date men shorter than them. I for one always leaned toward taller men (I'm 5'7") but married a man who was 5'6" and I LOVE to wear heals. Doesn't bother me a bit. I married him because of his personality, work ethic and what I thought at the time of his character. I would be turned off however by a 28 year old who still lived at home unless it was to take care of ailing parents. Start enjoying yourself and you will attract women by the handfuls. Enthusiasm, high self esteem, and joy are VERY contagious and everyone wants to catch it. If a woman is only interested in your looks then why would you want to be married to someone so shallow.
Rorschach Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I agree that a picture would be very very helpful. There are ways of posting a picture of oneself while remaining anonymous. Just put a black bar over your eyes... I think he's just afraid of having everybody tell him there is nothing wrong with him because honestly thats not what he wants to hear. He's just looking for somebody to tell him that he's right, that he doesn't have a chance because of the way he looks, that its not his fault and that he can just throw money at the problem to fix it.
Lakeside_runner Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I think he's just afraid of having everybody tell him there is nothing wrong with him because honestly thats not what he wants to hear. He's just looking for somebody to tell him that he's right, that he doesn't have a chance because of the way he looks, that its not his fault and that he can just throw money at the problem to fix it. Well, "sometimes you have to rick it to get the biscuit"...
xpaperxcutx Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 The biggest irony I see coming from most of the detractors is if I posted a thread called: "I'm 38 years old and never been married and am lonely" Everybody would come in and say it's my fault for not changing things while I am still young. Marrying later in life is all the norm nowadays. Nobody expects you to get married at 30 or 32. Sometimes people just don't marry and most remain bachelors for life. I don't ever want to get married. And I'm from a traditional Asian family. I think you should hold off surgery for now, and really reevaluate what is it you want in life ( for yourself).
Star Gazer Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Jesus. With advice like this, no wonder you're fat and alone. OP - I fully support anyone getting plastic surgery, if it's done for the right reasons. Stay realistic that it won't change your life and be a miracle fix, but, if you have self-esteem issues and have wanted to change aspects of your appearance for a long time, then go for it. Though, let me make a suggestion on the hairline thing. If your complaint is that you are losing your hair in your late 20's, why not save the money from the surgery and just shave your head? I happen to think a lot of men look fabulous shaved bald, and it's still a very fashionable look. Then you could not be so cash-strapped from the surgery, and can put the money towards procedures that will have more bang for the buck. Totally agree with everything JB said.
Star Gazer Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I'm going to laugh when you get it done and don't even feel any better about yourself and stay single and miserable until you realize it's your attitude that has to change. This is a RIDICULOUSLY inappropriate thing to say to someone looking for advice/support.
VertexSquared Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Again, OpenGL, post a pic with a bar over the eyes. It'd really help us decide whether or not you have a reasonable justification in dropping an insane amount of dough, or whether or not this issue is one purely out of self-esteem and mental hangups.
marsle85 Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Let me see what you look like, provide a picture. I'll tell you if you need it or not.
FitChick Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Post a photo or photos from the nose down in profile and full face so we can see your chin and jaw. That would be anonymous. Do you need lipo or a chin implant? Use Rogaine 5% to stop your hair from falling out any more. Then when the hair loss has stabilized you will have a better idea if you want or need transplants. If you just get transplants now in the front, the hair will continue to fall out in the back and you will look strange. Helluva lot cheaper, too. Why don't you date short women like Japanese or Thai? They are used to being with short men. I'm 5'8" and dated a man 5'6" and the only reason I broke it off was because he was a cocky jerk, nothing to do with his height.
Mme. Chaucer Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Iggy Pop is 5'7" (no, he is not really 5'1") and he doesn't exactly have a "handsome" face ... but he's a sex god. So is Tom Cruise, and I understand that he is considered attractive by some.
dazzle22 Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 100% Serious Something I have been thinking about doing for awhile and I just confirmed my appointment (consultation) with one of the top doctors in LA in a few weeks time. I plan on getting my receding hairline filled in with a hair transplant and getting minor work done to my chin area (spot fat removal and chin straightening). This will probably cost me a bit over $10000, but I approved for $12000 financing at 0% (plus some fees) and I have a bit of extra cash saved up. I'm already 28 years old, at this point I really need to do something if I even want a remote chance at getting married and starting a family someday. Don't say "you have plenty of time" because it takes years to get into a relationship, get married, at start up a family and the market drys up the older you get. At 28 years old the market is already pretty damn dry. After I get these things done it's hard to say what other type of surgery I will need. My bodyfat is already pretty low so maybe just to clean up some more genetic flaws in my face. Also, if I still do not have a girl by the age of 32 I'm going to empty my retirement account and fly to japan to get the height increase surgery. Actually, I think if you are going to have something done, these two things - hair and chin work will give you the most bang for the buck. A strong chin line definitely adds to one's appeal. I had blepharoplasty done, because I inherited really baggy upper eyelids, and it turned out fabulous, and finally my hazel cat eyes can be seen. Never regretted that surgery for a second!
somedude81 Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I weigh 140lb and can bench press about 245lb. I do have wide shoulders (obviously) but I wouldn't go as far as to say I look like a box. I know what you're talking about though. And I'm not all gross roided out. Dude you seem to have an awesome body. Haven't you gotten any confidence from that? You're hella strong for your weight. I'm 28, 5'6, 160 and I can barely bench 130. Though you've probably been working out much longer than I have. You said you were at 11% BF? Do you ever catch women checking you out? As for the thread topic, I think surgery should be an absolute last resort. I highly doubt that you are so butt ugly that you need to go under the knife. Since you seem willing to spend some cash; have you considered doing a pick up artist bootcamp? They can be pretty expensive $2,000 for a weekend but I heard they can really help transform men. Some names/companies you might want to look into are; Adam Lyons, Brad P, Real Social Dynamics/Tyler Durden, Magic. If Pick Up fails for you then at least you know that you tried and found something that doesn't work.
xpaperxcutx Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Iggy Pop is 5'7" (no, he is not really 5'1") and he doesn't exactly have a "handsome" face ... but he's a sex god. So is Tom Cruise, and I understand that he is considered attractive by some. Not to go off topic, but speaking Tom Cruise, I think he's actual height is 5'8, no? Anyways, if Tom Cruise has been self conscience he would have dated shorter women, but seeing as both Nicole Kidman and Katie Holmes have towered over him, dating the women he has hasn't exactly accentuate his height. But he's always confident on red carpet ( could just be his cocky personality).
Author OpenGL Posted May 25, 2010 Author Posted May 25, 2010 Marrying later in life is all the norm nowadays. Nobody expects you to get married at 30 or 32. Sometimes people just don't marry and most remain bachelors for life. Average for men is 28, so I'm already past average. By 32 I will be far passed average. don't ever want to get married. And I'm from a traditional Asian family. I think you should hold off surgery for now, and really reevaluate what is it you want in life ( for yourself). Thats very odd being Asian and a woman but more power to you for your decision.
Lakeside_runner Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 Average for men is 28, so I'm already past average. By 32 I will be far passed average. Thats very odd being Asian and a woman but more power to you for your decision. One observation based on this post - for starters, focus less on statistics and stereotypes. Everybody is unique and different.
Author OpenGL Posted May 25, 2010 Author Posted May 25, 2010 Dude you seem to have an awesome body. Haven't you gotten any confidence from that? You're hella strong for your weight. I'm 28, 5'6, 160 and I can barely bench 130. Though you've probably been working out much longer than I have. You said you were at 11% BF? Do you ever catch women checking you out? Been working out for about 3-4 years on and off, it takes a very long time to get that strong. I'm generally outside the field of vision for women. As for the thread topic, I think surgery should be an absolute last resort. I highly doubt that you are so butt ugly that you need to go under the knife. This is the last resort, if you have been following my time on LS you would know I have had this problem for years. Since you seem willing to spend some cash; have you considered doing a pick up artist bootcamp? They can be pretty expensive $2,000 for a weekend but I heard they can really help transform men. Some names/companies you might want to look into are; Adam Lyons, Brad P, Real Social Dynamics/Tyler Durden, Magic. If Pick Up fails for you then at least you know that you tried and found something that doesn't work. PUA crap is the biggest waste of money ever and is a general insult to the intelligence of women (and you know I'm no supporter of women).
txsilkysmoothe Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 It will be paid back in 18 months. I can afford the monthly payments, barely, I will have almost not extra money for a year and a half. I'm honestly thinking about moving back in with my parents to have extra spending money if I go through with this. NO, you'll never get a date! Would you care to post a pic and get some friendly feedback?
Rorschach Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 (and you know I'm no supporter of women). Maybe women are picking up on your women hating vibe.
Star Gazer Posted May 25, 2010 Posted May 25, 2010 I have zero tolerance for people who complain about the position they are in and even less tolerance for people who complain and then refuse to accept good advice (which I HAVE given to OpenGL, I just don't give anymore as it feels like wasted effort). Who are you to decide what's good advice versus what's not? He's complaining about the position he's in, AND TAKING STEPS to change it. Just like you are, right? You can work out and diet to become un-obese. He can't do the same to change his hairline and chin.
Recommended Posts