Tears.

[mishy]

Mishy, when I asked you how you feel about him now, I was hoping that you would say angry. You NEED to get angry. Many guys can be douches, but what this guy is doing to you makes me want to just by reading it.

 

He probably didn't start off this way. But in 2 years time, you have let him have sex with you whenever he wanted while asking nothing in return, not even basic respect. This really shows how low your self-esteem is. And if you see yourself in such a low light, he will perceive you the same way, as in not worthy of love or even firendship.

 

You need to get strong. You need to STOP doing this to yourself. Do you have any girlfriends you can talk to? Cut this guy off. If you need to do it step by step, tell yourself "I won't e-mail him for 2 weeks" then see how you feel at the end of 2 weeks.

 

Also post here whenever you need to talk.....

 

Yes i can see how i have created this monster by allowing him to get away with so much bad treatment in the two years.

 

As for emailing him, well normally my emails are chit chat or asking him something. So now im not allowed to do that. The only other reason to email him is asking for sex, but because i am not allowed to email him for chit chat or anything freindly, then i dont actually WANT sex with him.

 

so in effect i dont think theres any danger of me emailing him, because i dont have anything i can email about...

[Payden]

This man is NOT good enough for you...you do know this right?.

 

You need to cut him off and search for someone that actually gives a crap for you.

 

I guarantee when a better offer comes along, he'll not even want you for sex.

 

A good movie you should go out and rent is called "Spread" with Ashton Kutcher... It is about a young, good looking guy who makes his way in life using his looks to get in their pants.

 

Cut this guy off...he is NOT good enough for you, hun. Plenty of nice guys just waiting to scoop up a girl like you and BTW... you seem like such a sweetie it's not even funny.

 

Don't let him bring you down..stand back up, cut him off and tell him to kiss your ........

 

Take care.

[mishy]

Mishy, when I asked you how you feel about him now, I was hoping that you would say angry. You NEED to get angry. Many guys can be douches, but what this guy is doing to you makes me want to just by reading it.

 

He probably didn't start off this way. But in 2 years time, you have let him have sex with you whenever he wanted while asking nothing in return, not even basic respect. This really shows how low your self-esteem is. And if you see yourself in such a low light, he will perceive you the same way, as in not worthy of love or even firendship.

 

You need to get strong. You need to STOP doing this to yourself. Do you have any girlfriends you can talk to? Cut this guy off. If you need to do it step by step, tell yourself "I won't e-mail him for 2 weeks" then see how you feel at the end of 2 weeks.

 

Also post here whenever you need to talk.....

 

I am not quite angry yet. Still hurt

[mishy]

This man is NOT good enough for you...you do know this right?.

 

You need to cut him off and search for someone that actually gives a crap for you.

 

I guarantee when a better offer comes along, he'll not even want you for sex.

 

A good movie you should go out and rent is called "Spread" with Ashton Kutcher... It is about a young, good looking guy who makes his way in life using his looks to get in their pants.

 

Cut this guy off...he is NOT good enough for you, hun. Plenty of nice guys just waiting to scoop up a girl like you and BTW... you seem like such a sweetie it's not even funny.

 

Don't let him bring you down..stand back up, cut him off and tell him to kiss your ........

 

Take care.

 

i cant imagine contacting him now, so in effect he has been cut off. he will notice im gone in a couple of weeks (he will be still expecting an email "once a week" as he hasd given me "permission " to email that often) yeah so he will notice in a couple of weeks but by then he will be screwing with somebody elses head and body .

[whichwayisup]

When your anger hits, boy, you'll want to contact him and YELL at him.. But, don't. POST here, or do draft emails TO him, but do NOT send them. Don't even put the email address in the to field..

 

Let your ego and pride take over! Yes, you're right, you can't email him now, let alone sleep with him again. yuck..

 

you can do this, so believe in yourself! I honestly think that within a month, you'll feel so much happier and like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

[mishy]

When your anger hits, boy, you'll want to contact him and YELL at him.. But, don't. POST here, or do draft emails TO him, but do NOT send them. Don't even put the email address in the to field..

 

Let your ego and pride take over! Yes, you're right, you can't email him now, let alone sleep with him again. yuck..

 

you can do this, so believe in yourself! I honestly think that within a month, you'll feel so much happier and like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

 

 

he said the other night that i only email him when i want him to do something for him - but you see he wont go out with me or see a movie or have a coffee, so i cant email asking him to do that so i email him asking him how to do something etc, like a spreadsheet. He has helped me with businessy things before- and offered to help.

 

and so i feel like emailing and APOLOGISING for asking him to help with with stuff all the time. I wont, but i was only asking him to help me with stuff to stay in contact.

 

we have never been anywhere in public together (no he is not married or anything). he just thinks that if we do things together it will mean more than sex buddies.

 

i have never seen him even eat food, we havent even had a meal together.

 

ive only seen him eat me

[mishy]

When your anger hits, boy, you'll want to contact him and YELL at him.. But, don't. POST here, or do draft emails TO him, but do NOT send them. Don't even put the email address in the to field..

 

Let your ego and pride take over! Yes, you're right, you can't email him now, let alone sleep with him again. yuck..

 

you can do this, so believe in yourself! I honestly think that within a month, you'll feel so much happier and like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

 

 

yeah its yuck, i may as well get paid, its no better than being a hooker. in fact its worse, because id be doing it for free.

[SadandConfusedWA]

Oh, the anger will come.. that's the next stage

 

BTW I keep trying to figure out what is in your avatar picture. Is it smoke? Is it an animal? Am I blind

[whichwayisup]

It's a cat..

 

oh yeah, anger will come..I look forward to your posts when that happens!

 

In the meantime, beating up on yourself is NOT a good idea. It'll just make you feel worse and do damage to your self confidence.

 

Start pampering yourself. Go shopping, have a spa day... Make you feel good!

[mishy]

Oh, the anger will come.. that's the next stage

 

BTW I keep trying to figure out what is in your avatar picture. Is it smoke? Is it an animal? Am I blind

 

lol its my cat. Mishka- (mishy)

[mishy]

It's a cat..

 

oh yeah, anger will come..I look forward to your posts when that happens!

 

In the meantime, beating up on yourself is NOT a good idea. It'll just make you feel worse and do damage to your self confidence.

 

Start pampering yourself. Go shopping, have a spa day... Make you feel good!

 

 

ya know i have been through this sort of thing with him sooooooooooooooo many times, that i dont feel anger, i dont have the energy to be angry at him anymore

[xpaperxcutx]

he said the other night that i only email him when i want him to do something for him - but you see he wont go out with me or see a movie or have a coffee, so i cant email asking him to do that so i email him asking him how to do something etc, like a spreadsheet. He has helped me with businessy things before- and offered to help.

 

and so i feel like emailing and APOLOGISING for asking him to help with with stuff all the time. I wont, but i was only asking him to help me with stuff to stay in contact.

 

we have never been anywhere in public together (no he is not married or anything). he just thinks that if we do things together it will mean more than sex buddies.

 

i have never seen him even eat food, we havent even had a meal together.

 

ive only seen him eat me

 

Why have you never spoken up to him about this? It seemed that his behaviour had been apparent from the start, yet you were afraid to speak up for fear that he might break things off.

[xpaperxcutx]

ya know i have been through this sort of thing with him sooooooooooooooo many times, that i dont feel anger, i dont have the energy to be angry at him anymore

Hopefully when the anger does hit, you'll channel it positively to push you forward into a better direction. As long as it doesn't push you back into contacting him.

[mishy]

oh i have spoken to him about it before. i have asked him to do things outside of teh bedroom. he has always said no

[SadandConfusedWA]

oh i have spoken to him about it before. i have asked him to do things outside of teh bedroom. he has always said no

 

That's when you should have stopped having sex with him.

[sharkhunter]

Mishy: personally I avoid the FWB thing like the plague. When you have intimate relations w/ someone, especially if you're a woman, emotions come into play that you simply cannot control. Find yourself a guy who LOVES you for who you are. That's where true happiness exists

[mishy]

UPDATE:

 

 

he emailed me to arrange a hook up and i stupidly agreed

 

We have never met anywhere at all besides my house in 2 years. I havent even been further than my front gate with him.

 

So i emailed suggesting we go somewhere, like outdoors. He agreed and said ok how about tomorrow.

 

I emailed back the next morning (yesterday( and sad yes, and asked where he wanted to go and then he never replied

 

I am guessing he has thought about it and freaked out that meeting somewhere other than my house means i want "MORE".

 

He wont reply to any emails.

[mishy]

no he isnt married or has a gf

[alwaysl868]

Im in almost the same situation. It has been 2 years for us too and I am going through the same thing only we have more of a friendship.

 

See my post, said he loved me then took it back.

 

If you ever need to talk, it might do us both some good.

 

Good luck, I certainly feel your pain.

 

You deserve better

[Ms. Joolie]

What an IDIOT! omg! Sorry. But I just could not put up with that kind of behavior!

 

... while your playing around with that guy, why don't you find yourself a better lover, if that's all you want?

 

Does it ever bother you that he's most likely sleeping with lots of other women?? UGH. Next time you see him, just kick his ASS for me. lol. Can not believe one man can have a young and no doubt lovely woman in such shape. He's sucking the life out of you! ... He's aging you beyond your time!

 

 

Well, good luck. Seems you're quite addicted to him. heh

[mishy]

I dont know anymore, i really dont. Still no email

 

What is sooo frickin bad about meeting somewhere else??? HOW is that asking "too much"?? Why does he think that means i want a relationship?

[mishy]

:(can someone please tell me how to get out of this. Is it me??? is it me who's wrong?? AM i asking too much? Edited February 6, 2010 by mishy

[mishy]

no body is around:(

[whichwayisup]

Mishy, you need to stop with him completely.. If he stays in your life, he's going to continue to treat you badly, disrespect you and use you. Please, as much as it hurts, stop contacting him and say NO to him if he contacts you for a hook up.

 

He's not worth it! He's scum and you deserve better!!

[WTRanger]

To answer your question. Yes, in his eyes you are asking too much of him. A normal man, no. Him, yes. Why should he have to put any effort when zero and even less that zero effort from him yields sex? That's like winning the jackpot without even buying a ticket!

 

This guy is poison and you are allowing him to do this to you.