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Huh? If I'm having doubts?


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K - I've always felt the urge to have to explain myself. I don't know why. It doesn't matter to who. Well I mean a stranger, no, but if I feel bad about something, I want to explain myself. It's rather annoying.

 

Well once you've apologized or explained yourself, are you then able to let it go? There's nothing wrong with communicating - and you guys are definitely on the right track there. The trick is to communicate your needs while keeping things light. So, for instance, say you said something that *offended* him and he points it out: say you understand, apologize (if you do feel like it warrants an apology) and thank him for bringing it up. Issue resolved. This isn't a battle of who did what when and why or of who is right or wrong. It's about setting a pattern where you two can communicate about the everyday little things that come up in human interactions.

 

I worry that you might be explaining yourself to protect an image you want him to have of you. What he thinks of you, you cannot control. Your job is to be yourself and to take care of yourself and your well-being. As long as you do that, you allow the relationship to grow.

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