Author spookie Posted February 3, 2009 Author Posted February 3, 2009 Alright everyone... I had my meeting with HR and I honestly think everyone on here is over-reacting. Maybe it's because I work for a small non-public company, but NO ONE is treating this as that big a deal. HR told me they handled this kind of thing all the time, POST-something happening, and they were impressed I spoke up before breaking company rules. They also reitirated, like Jack and his boss before, that everyone thinks I am a fantastic employee, they all understand because we are all human, and that the priority is to meet my needs so that I am happy and productive. I don't know, even if this follows me I'm finding it hard to remain pessimistic. At least this is a load off my chest. I know myself, and while waiting indefintiely, or making a move on my own, would have worked for some people, this was the best way for me. Perhaps things would have been different if they felt I didn't take my job seriously, but I think I've proven otherwise in the past couple of months. As I said, everyone is really impressed with me, and I don't feel "trapped" here like some poster implied. The economy sucks, yes, but my profession isn't faring too badly and I know I'd be able to support myself no matter what happened. Also, this is a state of at-will employment, so they could have fired me, with no reasons and no legal repurcussions, if they wanted to, already. And they said once I got a transfer, we COULD date. =)
imani Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 That guy was not in my department, there was only one half-assed incident, and I doubt very much it had anything to do with his divorce. Oh okay. I guess I misunderstood too. I thought MM was a guy you worked with as well.
imani Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 Alright everyone... I had my meeting with HR and I honestly think everyone on here is over-reacting. Maybe it's because I work for a small non-public company, but NO ONE is treating this as that big a deal. HR told me they handled this kind of thing all the time, POST-something happening, and they were impressed I spoke up before breaking company rules. They also reitirated, like Jack and his boss before, that everyone thinks I am a fantastic employee, they all understand because we are all human, and that the priority is to meet my needs so that I am happy and productive. I don't know, even if this follows me I'm finding it hard to remain pessimistic. At least this is a load off my chest. I know myself, and while waiting indefintiely, or making a move on my own, would have worked for some people, this was the best way for me. Perhaps things would have been different if they felt I didn't take my job seriously, but I think I've proven otherwise in the past couple of months. As I said, everyone is really impressed with me, and I don't feel "trapped" here like some poster implied. The economy sucks, yes, but my profession isn't faring too badly and I know I'd be able to support myself no matter what happened. Also, this is a state of at-will employment, so they could have fired me, with no reasons and no legal repurcussions, if they wanted to, already. And they said once I got a transfer, we COULD date. =) Awesome! Now we'll just see where Mr. Hotness dribbles his ball. Good luck with this one, Spookie.
Author spookie Posted February 3, 2009 Author Posted February 3, 2009 Oh okay. I guess I misunderstood too. I thought MM was a guy you worked with as well. I work "with him" in the sense that we work for the same mother company, but he's doing a different job in a different division on another floor and I never see him unless I go out of my way.
Trialbyfire Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 Oh okay. I guess I misunderstood too. I thought MM was a guy you worked with as well. She does work with him. Refer to my previous post. She describes him as her "coworker".
Author spookie Posted February 3, 2009 Author Posted February 3, 2009 She does work with him. Refer to my previous post. She describes him as her "coworker". Yes, he is my co-workers, but as I explained, far enough removed where I don't see what happened as "work drama". Personal drama, yes, but what's your point? I'm not deserving of love cause I'm not a virgin? Or that I needed to wait for months longer before I could reasonably trust myself about Jack? With my friend, I made a mistake. We're still on good terms, though not as close. He'll still getting a divorce from his wife, like he planned all along, even before the act, even though I've been clear nothing between us is going to happen. I don't see what the big deal is.
Touche Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 That sounds good Spook! So when do you transfer?
imani Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 I work "with him" in the sense that we work for the same mother company, but he's doing a different job in a different division on another floor and I never see him unless I go out of my way. Oh, okay. Got it.
Author spookie Posted February 3, 2009 Author Posted February 3, 2009 That sounds good Spook! So when do you transfer? They're letting me know at the end of the week! I'm actually really hoping to get into this fraud detection division we have, where my job would be to search for patterns in claims. That sounds awesome and programming-heavy, just like I like it; and I think my background in being shady could actually come in handy. (In short, dream job for me.)
Touche Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 They're letting me know at the end of the week! I'm actually really hoping to get into this fraud detection division we have, where my job would be to search for patterns in claims. That sounds awesome and programming-heavy, just like I like it; and I think my background in being shady could actually come in handy. (In short, dream job for me.) That was funny. That actually sounds like a really interesting job though. I hope it all works out for you. Has Jack said anything to you about the transfer since the last time you talked? How was his demeanor today?
imani Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 They're letting me know at the end of the week! I'm actually really hoping to get into this fraud detection division we have, where my job would be to search for patterns in claims. That sounds awesome and programming-heavy, just like I like it; and I think my background in being shady could actually come in handy. (In short, dream job for me.) Hey, use what you know.
Trialbyfire Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Yes, he is my co-workers, but as I explained, far enough removed where I don't see what happened as "work drama". Personal drama, yes, but what's your point? I'm not deserving of love cause I'm not a virgin? Or that I needed to wait for months longer before I could reasonably trust myself about Jack? With my friend, I made a mistake. We're still on good terms, though not as close. He'll still getting a divorce from his wife, like he planned all along, even before the act, even though I've been clear nothing between us is going to happen. I don't see what the big deal is. My point spookie, is and has always been, about healthy choices. You muddle your way through life, not much caring about the swath of destruction you leave behind you, as long as your personal needs are met. You've been lucky so far but others, like your friend and his wife, aren't so lucky with the fallout. I don't know how this will work out with Jack or your company. Regardless if it comes out roses or not, will you continue on your path of self-destruction?
OpenBook Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 They're letting me know at the end of the week! I'm actually really hoping to get into this fraud detection division we have, where my job would be to search for patterns in claims. That sounds awesome and programming-heavy, just like I like it; and I think my background in being shady could actually come in handy. (In short, dream job for me.) Did you mention this to anyone? They seem to be "laying out the red carpet" for you right now, so I would definitely take advantage of that! I'm so glad they're being nice to you. It sounds like they've been through this a million times, in much uglier situations... and probably involving Jack on a number of occasions!
johan Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Someone on a self-destructive path would probably not be well-regarded and holding a job like yours, Spookie. You do play with fire though. blah, blah, get burned, blah, blah, blah... you know. Anyway, I do feel like you dodged a bit of a bullet here. Something told you not to turn this into a really bad situation. I think that's a good thing. People with crappier instincts would have turned this into a mess. You can have more faith in yourself now. And you can use that boost in self-esteem to maybe make some friends and to stop fooling around with low-class guys. And maybe to cut down on the substance abuse. Just putting that out there in case it hadn't already occurred to you.
Touche Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Nice post, Johan. Completely agree. It's worth reading and absorbing J's post a few times, Spook. Let this be the start of a new and better chapter in your life.
johan Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Why don't we all use Spookie's little episode as motivation to turn over a new leaf?
Touche Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Why don't we all use Spookie's little episode as motivation to turn over a new leaf? I've been working on myself. My mother always used to say we're all works in progress. I love that. It's really true.
Alpha Female Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 In this case we don't know. I'm just guessing that maybe that's why he acted so fast..so he can date her and not risk his job. It's anyone's guess really. If he was interested in dating her, he wouldn't have told HR and his boss the truth about her need for a transfer. If he had even a remote desire to date her, he would have kept mum and would have just facilitated her transfer. The fact that he told his boss and HR shows that he has absolutely no interest in her, besides getting her out of his department and away from his job security. Spookie: Dont be naive. If the company is planning on building a case to fire you, they wouldn't tell you such. And everyone without a contract is an employee at will. Doesnt mean you cant sue a company for wrongful dismissal.
johan Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 He was bragging. He high-fived everyone in HR. Then they promised to get this done quick for him.
D-Lish Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 If he was interested in dating her, he wouldn't have told HR and his boss the truth about her need for a transfer. If he had even a remote desire to date her, he would have kept mum and would have just facilitated her transfer. The fact that he told his boss and HR shows that he has absolutely no interest in her, besides getting her out of his department and away from his job security. Spookie: Dont be naive. If the company is planning on building a case to fire you, they wouldn't tell you such. And everyone without a contract is an employee at will. Doesnt mean you cant sue a company for wrongful dismissal. But she just stated they have a no fault firing policy- contract.... they can let her go at anytime. I would think they would have done so by now if there was a problem.
Alpha Female Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 But she just stated they have a no fault firing policy- contract.... they can let her go at anytime. I would think they would have done so by now if there was a problem. That's not the way it works in cases such as this.
johan Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Who knows how many of Spookie's co-workers have requested transfers out because they had feelings for her. They probably arranged it quietly. Maybe her boss was trying to get a transfer himself for the same reason. Now he doesn't have to. It's a win-win situation.
Touche Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Anyone can sue for anything. Doesn't mean you'll win. As to the boss's motivations for telling HR, it could be what you're saying but it very well could be what I said. You don't know any more than I do. I guess time will tell. It sounds like her company is treating her very well. They must not have the usual "HR" type heading the HR dept. You act like this is a whole conspiracy to fire her. Ridiculous. And I don't think it's necessary to imply that Spookie is being naive. There's no evidence of that in my opinion.
You'reasian Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Hey Spookie, I noticed earlier that you speak Russian? That's a hard langauge, huh.
D-Lish Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 That's not the way it works in cases such as this. Why not? If she has no contract and they can fire her at anytime... Why wouldn't they have fired her already? I dunno- I am in Canada- lawsuits are way fewer and much harder to bring to the table. Is it a liability issue?
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