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Countdown - How long til your LDR ISN'T long distance anymore


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strongertoday

HUGS Islandgirl......It must be so hard to keep focussed and not loose heart....We would love to hear how you guys met and such and I am curious why it is taking so darn long ! Our thoughts are with you.

 

Well my guy was told 2 to 8 weeks for the visa. It was 7 weeks last Friday so he rang them and they are following it up "We should know something in a few days" which I *hope* means an answer not another 4 week wait !! Life is hard for him at the moment stuck in a small room at his mums with all his stuff, her stuff and not much money to get out. He is really down. I am sending him parcels but that gets so expensive too. He spent the weekend with his mates so I hope that cheered him up.

 

My Christmas wish will be that every visa office HURRYS UP !!!!!!!

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strongertoday

VISA APPROVED......

 

and he is off trying to book flights on dial up....lol

 

and I am trying really hard not to cry like a baby I am so happy.....

 

:love:

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Omg, do you have any visa advice. My fiance is in Melbourne too, and I'm in America. He's had family members deported because they screwed up their visas. what kind of visa are you doing???

Hi Crimsonrose,

 

Sorry I haven't replied sooner, life is crazy at the moment.

 

The Visa we went with was the Prospective Spouse.

 

It gives you 9months to get married and then you apply for the Spouse Visa which is a Two year bridging visa/permanent residency concurrently, at the end of the two years he'll automatically unless he's done something illegal, be a permanent residence.

 

If you have any questions let me know, I have heaps of tips for the immigration process just not sure where you want me to start. I'm away for the next two weeks so don't be offended if I can't get to a computer ;)

 

Sy

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HUGS Islandgirl......It must be so hard to keep focussed and not loose heart....We would love to hear how you guys met and such and I am curious why it is taking so darn long ! Our thoughts are with you.

 

Hey!! Sorry so long for the reply -- I moved in the interim and missed this post!

 

We met here. The "normal" way - in person. Actually in a bar...lol He was partying with the local rugby team he was coaching at the time. To be honest I thought he'd be fired in a couple of weeks (he thought the same thing about me) but it just kind of stuck for both of us.

 

When he went back to Tonga we were living together and had discussed marriage but it is a pretty serious thing to sponsor someone to come here and I have been married before so I wasn't too keen on just jumping in without knowing it would stick. So three years later we were still together and went ahead and got married.

 

Originally we had tickets to go to the embassy in Fiji to file his paperwork but there was a coup two days before I supposed to leave. We decided to regroup and reschedule (tickets could still be used within 6 months) because of CIA warnings at the time and then were informed by the embassy they would not take the paperwork because of a law that did not (nor has ever) apply to us (turns out the law was not enacted until October of last year so it wasn't even in effect at the time the embassy cited it as reason for no longer accepting spousal paperwork and has since been challenged as unconstitutional - UGH!) but advice from our attorney was not to fight them on it since they have the say on whether he comes or not and can choose ANY reason to not grant it. Best for me not to piss them off, right? So we filed through California which is incredibly slow due to the amount of immigrants being processed. Ugh again. The wheels turn slowly -- told 12 to 18 months and we are just at 18 months right now...his interview is around the corner and the end is finally in sight. YEAH!!

 

It really has only been two years (only 2 years - that sounds funny doesn't it - ?) since July since 2006 as he was ineligible to apply for a spousal visa until we were married.

 

The previous 4 years were just your average LDR I guess. lol

 

My Christmas wish will be that every visa office HURRYS UP !!!!!!!

 

Thank you!! Christmas seems to be hardest on him. He has complained each year that we are spending Christmas apart. It has been 6 Christmases so far and this year he started lamenting about it in June. :sick:

 

VISA APPROVED......

 

and he is off trying to book flights on dial up....lol

 

and I am trying really hard not to cry like a baby I am so happy.....

 

:love:

 

OMG CONGRATULATIONS!!! Go ahead and cry! It is an especially joyous occasion for both of you!! Whoo Hoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy for you both! GREAT NEWS!!! :D

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strongertoday

HUGS everyone......

 

Well one hour ago he got on the coach to head to Heathrow...then on the plane...will be here in 29 hours.....YIPPEE

 

Island Girl....oh hun, thats terrible how political things seem to get in the way. My thoughts and prayers are with you that this is the last Christmas apart for you both

 

ok well I am off to get a little more teary and clean house before I head off to get my hair done later...so much to do now...lol...

 

:)

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Well one hour ago he got on the coach to head to Heathrow...then on the plane...will be here in 29 hours.....YIPPEE

 

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! 29 hours --- HOURS!!!!!!!! You must be so axious and excited! Ahhhhhhhhhhh and then BLISS for a lifetime.:love:

Congrats over and over again.

 

Island Girl....oh hun, thats terrible how political things seem to get in the way. My thoughts and prayers are with you that this is the last Christmas apart for you both

 

Thank you so much. It means a lot you don't even know. I am hoping this Christmas we won't HAVE to be apart...but that is up to the US Government. *sigh*

 

ok well I am off to get a little more teary and clean house before I head off to get my hair done later...so much to do now...lol...:)

 

Time drags on and on -- then the day is here and there doesn't seem to be enough time to do everything! I know how that goes. lol

Just remember to breathe! ;):bunny::bunny:

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It's 45 days for me...

 

Then I'll have a month with him before I have to start going to UNI 2 hours away (by car), but I don't count that since right now we're 6600 miles apart. When I'm only 2 hours away, I'll definitely be seeing him at least every week. :]

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Island Girl, thank you for all your kind words! They really helped! I was having a hard time a few days ago and rereading your words of advice. I read your story and I have to hand it to you and your husband - you are both very strong! Just a little more wait to go and you will be together, hand in hand, forever :)

strongertoday, OMG CONGRATULATIONS! I'm so happy for you! :bunny: :bunny:

 

And just today, just this morning (a few minutes ago) I checked my email with a letter from my bf saying he finally got an email from the Migration Board (their immi) saying they have our application, with a official number for us and asked for the required paperwork back from him. We both sent separate emails to them to confirm our application, he sent it over a week ago, and I just sent it yesterday. I was scared they didn't get it yet ... but yay ... OMG I'm soooo happy I had to post here ASAP. OK I should get ready for work now :)

 

:bunny::bunny::bunny::bunny::bunny:

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Island Girl, thank you for all your kind words! They really helped! I was having a hard time a few days ago and rereading your words of advice. I read your story and I have to hand it to you and your husband - you are both very strong! Just a little more wait to go and you will be together, hand in hand, forever :)

 

I'm so glad I could help. Hard days ARE really hard, aren't they? Sometimes I just feel like I can't do it anymore -- not the relationship but life in general. Somehow I do though. And there have been times when LS has really helped me through.

 

I hope that anyone - especially the immigration people - would read our story or our paperwork and be as touched by it as you were. I think then we'd have a guarantee of some sorts. But to my knowledge pulling at the heartstrings (if they have any lol) doesn't have any effect. :(

And just today, just this morning (a few minutes ago) I checked my email with a letter from my bf saying he finally got an email from the Migration Board (their immi) saying they have our application, with a official number for us and asked for the required paperwork back from him. We both sent separate emails to them to confirm our application, he sent it over a week ago, and I just sent it yesterday. I was scared they didn't get it yet ... but yay ... OMG I'm soooo happy I had to post here ASAP. OK I should get ready for work now :)

 

What good news! You say they asked for "required paperwork" back from him, what else do they need?

 

YAY glad you have a happy day here! SO GLAD for you!!!! :D

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612 to go for me

 

Hey Rollercoasterr. Have a wonderful time planning the wedding and try to lose yourself in the details. It will make the time go by faster.

 

Congratulations on finding your certain special someone. :bunny:

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strongertoday

I arrived at the airport 5 minutes after his arrival thinking would be a wait thru customs...Plane had arrived 15 minutes early but I was fairly sure I had time to race and fix my face and straight back to wait....

 

So I am standing staring at the gate...not that one...not that one...and I hear from behind me "so is he through yet..?" and there he was standing right beside me !!

 

So the last 2 days we have talked and hugged and right now he is sleeping (jet lag finally hit) and I wanted to pop back and give you all lots and lots of HOPE.

 

The whole journey while absolute hell pales in comparison to the joy of looking at him and knowing he never has to leave my side again....

 

HUGS and good luck to you all....I will keep popping back and saying hi (tho not much the next week or so I guess) ....YIPPEE

 

:love::love::love::love::love:

 

I love you Al

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I arrived at the airport 5 minutes after his arrival thinking would be a wait thru customs...Plane had arrived 15 minutes early but I was fairly sure I had time to race and fix my face and straight back to wait....

 

So I am standing staring at the gate...not that one...not that one...and I hear from behind me "so is he through yet..?" and there he was standing right beside me !!

 

So the last 2 days we have talked and hugged and right now he is sleeping (jet lag finally hit) and I wanted to pop back and give you all lots and lots of HOPE.

 

The whole journey while absolute hell pales in comparison to the joy of looking at him and knowing he never has to leave my side again....

 

HUGS and good luck to you all....I will keep popping back and saying hi (tho not much the next week or so I guess) ....YIPPEE

 

:love::love::love::love::love:

 

I love you Al

 

I am SO VERY HAPPY FOR YOU!!!

 

I imagine him at the airport all the time - face beaming, eyes locking, and that hug at the end! I know exactly how it will feel. I just can't wait for it to happen and I never know how to imagine the weather outside...lol

 

Of course you aren't going to be on LS much! You would be crazy not to try to spend every moment your eyes are open with him talking, laughing, and um well anything and everything ;)!!

 

Thank you for the hope. It helped sooooooooo much today! It was one of those bad days where it feels overwhelming...

 

BUT NOW, I feel inspired. Thanks again for sharing!

 

Enjoy your man! Enjoy each other! Eat, drink, be merry and all of that!

 

{{{{{{{{{{{{{ H U G S }}}}}}}}}}}}}}

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What good news! You say they asked for "required paperwork" back from him, what else do they need?

 

YAY glad you have a happy day here! SO GLAD for you!!!! :D

 

They asked for a copy of his driver's license, an official paper that states he's single (which should have been included already, but it wasn't) and a few questions regarding our relationship (basically the same stuff they asked me at the interview). This step is huge since this is it - after he submits this, then it's just a wait - they'll notify him if it's approved and then I get something added to my passport saying I'm a resident. The process is much easier than in other countries - and I'm thankful for that.

 

The problem now is ... I wanna be with him for New Year's Eve! My winter break starts on Dec 27th and I don't have to be back until Feb 9th! I want to be with him even though I'll move there as early as March 1st. Flights were surprisingly cheap right now so I made-up my mind before work this morning that I'm going ... BUT that's only "if" they approve my residency because I'm not supposed to be in country when I'm in the middle of applying. That and we're saving up for a house ... oh well, being able to visit this winter is the least of my worries -- they have to approve my application first!

 

Let's bring back the wishing we all get the answers we're wishing for this Christmas and that immigration offices worldwide would hurry up and bring true love together already! Uniting two people ... isn't that is truly the start of world peace? :laugh:

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I arrived at the airport 5 minutes after his arrival thinking would be a wait thru customs...Plane had arrived 15 minutes early but I was fairly sure I had time to race and fix my face and straight back to wait....

 

So I am standing staring at the gate...not that one...not that one...and I hear from behind me "so is he through yet..?" and there he was standing right beside me !!

 

So the last 2 days we have talked and hugged and right now he is sleeping (jet lag finally hit) and I wanted to pop back and give you all lots and lots of HOPE.

 

The whole journey while absolute hell pales in comparison to the joy of looking at him and knowing he never has to leave my side again....

 

HUGS and good luck to you all....I will keep popping back and saying hi (tho not much the next week or so I guess) ....YIPPEE

 

:love::love::love::love::love:

 

I love you Al

 

You are sooo sweet for posting! Thank you ... it brings me hope and inspiration to just hang in there. I am so happy you two are finally together! CONGRATULATIONS AGAIN!

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He's pushed the date back again, but this is the first time he's set a concrete date. Originally, it was "the end of October", then he said, "probably mid-November", but now he's finally commited to December 8.

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strongertoday

konfuzd....that will FLY by !!

 

Think Christmas and presents and parties and OMG you have to make room for his stuff and all that.

 

Keep busy it will go so fast....so happy for you

 

HUGS

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The last few days I started freaking out. Not because of the wait, but because of the move. Everytime I'm about send him these boxes (filled with my stuff) I freak out. This time with the added stress of my recent back injury and just finding out I have to move over the weekend kind of took my worries to a whole new level.

 

I wanted to post here first but thought I'd write him an email summarizing my fears and my need for reassurance. He is horrible with that and responded lightheartedly, sweetly ... but I still didn't get the reassurance I needed. I wanted him to repeat what he told me numerous times before --- that if I don't like it there, he'd go where ever I wanted. I wanted him to repeat how he just wants me happy. That he would also do the same for me (although I honestly feel I'd be completely happy in Sweden).

 

So I wrote a serious email -- my most serious letter yet. I asked him to take himself out of the equation, to really think about if he really does love me or if he just loves the fuzziness that somehow come along with me (something that may be temporary). I told him that this would only work in the long run if both of us mean the same for each other -- that both would be willing to do what it takes to be together. That if someone really loves another they just want that other person happy -- even if it means not being together. I felt good writing it. I finally put narrowed down some of my fears and told him all about it. But then I was scared we'd be broken up when he woke-up. I ranted to my friend back home all morning ... both of us talking about our significant others ... then he called sounding like he just rolled out of bed.

 

I held my breath and all I said was hello and he said, "I think we make so much sense. When I hold you, everything makes so much sense. I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you."

 

I was so happy! I am so happy! Although he's said those words to me before, saying it in that moment, on that morning, is all that I needed. Next time I loose sight of what's important and let me fears overwhelm me I am directly posting here so you all can give me a good smack down! I've packed the boxes and will send them by the end of this week.

 

To those of you out there that's expecting their love and experiencing moments of "freaking out" - please just have patience. Leaving all that you know to be with their love (often times to a foreign land) is a huge thing. Patience and reassurance ... sometimes that's all we need.

 

:)

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Well we're going to have a temporary lull in our LD if that counts!

 

In 28 days--Dec 7th, I'm boarding an overnight flight and will be spending about 3.5 months living with him again. It's an extended visit, sort of a once in a lifetime thing before I end up getting a new apartment. So here's hoping that once we go back to LD again after that...that it doesn't last much longer.

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strongertoday

Magpies....THANK YOU

 

I so needed that. We had our first real fight last night. I wanted him to come to bed (Sunday night I had work at 6am). He gamed with his best mate til 1am then was coming to bed in an hour. Fine with me, sounded like a plan. Needless to say he didnt.....but kept coming in and waking me. I said he should come to bed. He said he felt controlled.

 

Reading your post made me remember how much he has given up to move here. How he must miss just staying up for no reason and must miss the single life.

 

And he didnt ship stuff...so just came with his regular 20 kilo suitcase...once you took the tech out of it was hardly any clothes and the things he loves.

 

**I must be more patient**

 

HUGS all

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  • 1 month later...

73 days, 11 hours, 42 minutes

 

Finally got an exact date and booked my flight today! Even though immigration hasn't responded yet - I can't wait!!!!! Worse comes to worse and they don't give me a decision before I leave, I'll just take a train to a neighboring country and get my residency there. Alls good. (I hope so!)

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