Cobra_X30 Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Can we pullleeeeeezzzee get off this religion thing, or take it to the religion forum. There are a LOT of people who think adultery is wrong but are not religious. There are also a lot of people who are religious who commit adultery. And if you insist on quoting scripture how 'bout the one that says "judge not lest you be judged" ???? Not only did you just completely contradict yourself... you just placed that verse way out of context. Link to post Share on other sites
Jinnah Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 It’s my responsibility to make sure that my doors are locked at night, and my alarm system is working. However, should I become careless or forgetful ... or encounter an intruder who knows how to bypass all of my safety precautions ... is it then MY “burden” (or responsibility) if s/he enters my home and steals from me? I would never walk into a strangers home and take from them. Or harm their family or children. So why shouldn’t I hope to expect the same common respect and courtesy from another? Would I be wrong to hold that person not to “higher” or “double” standards ... but to equal standards and treatment? And would I be wrong to regard that intruder’s invasion as a personal assult against my safety and well-being? And would I be “wrong” to seek some form of justice and compensation for the injury inflicted upon me? OR is the belief of some posters here that BURDEN of responsibility towards others should fall only on the shoulders of those who care enough to even have “standards” in the first place ... while the rest don’t have to give a sh*t. (???) Feel free to disagree, but it seems more often (in a good majority of these posts) that it’s those who “inflict” harm on others that are more guilty of holding those they injure to a “higher set of standards.” :confused: You're a great person. Seriously. The world needs more people who think like you in this situation. Link to post Share on other sites
frannie Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 It’s my responsibility to make sure that my doors are locked at night, and my alarm system is working. However, should I become careless or forgetful ... or encounter an intruder who knows how to bypass all of my safety precautions ... is it then MY “burden” (or responsibility) if s/he enters my home and steals from me? The problem with that analogy is that your spouse isn't a piece of inanimate property, but a living person with volition and personal responsibility of their own. Apples and Oranges. Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Well, thats true! But you are not speaking for God in this situation, so you need to speak in accordance to your position in this world. See, here is the deal! By blaming OW for your husbands waywardness, your removing some of that blame from him! Oh, maybe you dont think you are... but by the mere fact that your thinking it... you are! I understand that it is a natural reaction... its hard to think that someone you are intimate with could do that to you! well that's the thing if there is any reconciling how can she stay pissed at the husband and sleep next to him every night, that anger has to be funneled some where Link to post Share on other sites
jj2007 Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Not really. In Jinnah's case, it is all about the blame. Also, "YES" when people cheat is is because there are problems in the marital relationship. People in perfectly happy marriages where both partners are content and fulfilled don't cheat. You can trust me on that. I don't know of ANY "perfectly happy" marriages do you? I would think that means the two in that perfect marriage would have to be perfect people and NO ONE is perfect. Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X30 Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Hmm, I quoted you as saying: "God does though... and he will blame according to their deeds, and Biblically adultery and fornication are wrong... Biblically the MP and the OW/OM are sinning" i.e. you're sinners, doing wrong, and God will blame you for this. That's not judging..? Ummm.... are you trying to say that God doesnt judge? I think your confused. Link to post Share on other sites
Jinnah Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Well, thats true! But you are not speaking for God in this situation, so you need to speak in accordance to your position in this world. See, here is the deal! By blaming OW for your husbands waywardness, your removing some of that blame from him! Oh, maybe you dont think you are... but by the mere fact that your thinking it... you are! I understand that it is a natural reaction... its hard to think that someone you are intimate with could do that to you! Let's agree to disagree. I know what God thinks b/c it's in the Bible. Two people can be at fault/sin, obviously. Let's clarify... it's my ex-husband, not my husband. My naturaly reaction was to jump for joy that I have a good reason to leave such an abusive person actually. Link to post Share on other sites
frannie Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Ummm.... are you trying to say that God doesnt judge? I think your confused. Um, no, I'm trying to say that it's up to God to judge (if that's your belief). Not for posters on a forum to say who is going to be damned and who isn't. Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Ummm.... are you trying to say that God doesnt judge? I think your confused. I don't think thats what she meant though cobra Link to post Share on other sites
TogetherForever Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 This might turn out to be the longest thread topic ever. TF:) Link to post Share on other sites
lovernotafighter Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 This might turn out to be the longest thread topic ever. TF:) sure is will, especially when you post that research of yours Link to post Share on other sites
frannie Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Let's agree to disagree. I know what God thinks b/c it's in the Bible. I think agreeing to disagree would be a great idea, especially when people start claiming that they 'know what God thinks' because it's in the holy book of their particular religion... Each to their own beliefs, and all that. Or is tolerance out of the window along with personal responsibility..? Link to post Share on other sites
Jinnah Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Hmm, I quoted you as saying: "God does though... and he will blame according to their deeds, and Biblically adultery and fornication are wrong... Biblically the MP and the OW/OM are sinning" i.e. you're sinners, doing wrong, and God will blame you for this. That's not judging..? Now you are pulling only half of what I said to suit your purpose. If you read the Bible, you should know that God will hold people accountable for their sin unless they accept Jesus as their Savior and they also have to repent. I am not judging just telling what the Bible says. Link to post Share on other sites
lost4ever Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 It’s my responsibility to make sure that my doors are locked at night, and my alarm system is working. However, should I become careless or forgetful ... or encounter an intruder who knows how to bypass all of my safety precautions ... is it then MY “burden” (or responsibility) if s/he enters my home and steals from me? I would never walk into a strangers home and take from them. Or harm their family or children. So why shouldn’t I hope to expect the same common respect and courtesy from another? Would I be wrong to hold that person not to “higher” or “double” standards ... but to equal standards and treatment? And would I be wrong to regard that intruder’s invasion as a personal assult against my safety and well-being? And would I be “wrong” to seek some form of justice and compensation for the injury inflicted upon me? OR is the belief of some posters here that BURDEN of responsibility towards others should fall only on the shoulders of those who care enough to even have “standards” in the first place ... while the rest don’t have to give a sh*t. (???) Feel free to disagree, but it seems more often (in a good majority of these posts) that it’s those who “inflict” harm on others that are more guilty of holding those they injure to a “higher set of standards This is one of those comparing apple's to orange's things, but I will try to explain how I feel. I do not consider my spouse as "property" so the OW can not take my "things"; he has free will and I do not own him, If he fell out of love with me I hope he tells me, If he cheats instead, he is a lying bastard and derserves to loose me as punishment for his crime. and another view People come in and out of your life for good and bad reasons, we do not label them "thefts" for stealing our time, resources, ect. The OP came into your life because the MM/MW invited them in. Link to post Share on other sites
TogetherForever Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Don't hold your breath now. Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 At last!! we're off the religion kick, so here's my real belief about affairs: (BTW, I know most won't agree, but that's OK.) It's all about evolution. Men are hard-wired to have sex. So are women. The problem is, though that we're wired differently. Men are "wired" to spread their little squigglies as widely as possible. Women are "wired" to attempt to attract (and keep) the biggest baddest male around who will protect her brood from the monsters and provide. In today's world, the biggest and baddest is usually not all that big or bad (physically) , but you get the idea. So.... we're all just running around fulfilling evolution's evil little intent for continuation of our species, and going crazy in the process. Now, that doesn't give anybody a reason to not control themselves (I'd like to think that after a few million years our brains could win out over our libido), but (again IMO) it does explain at the least why we women get so out of control - we've been battling over the men for a looonnnggg time. Link to post Share on other sites
Jinnah Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 How can you possibly disagree with that!? I didn't know either, so I just "washed my hands of the situation". Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 How can you possibly disagree with that!? Well, even I disagree with that. It's not my business if my neighbor decides to have an affair with another neighbor. I wouldn't like to see it and it would bother me. I would feel that they were screwing up their lives (and the lives of other people), but it's not my business. Link to post Share on other sites
luvmy2ns Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Now, that doesn't give anybody a reason to not control themselves (I'd like to think that after a few million years our brains could win out over our libido), Yeah, but ST, you're preaching to women with a very obviously limited amount of gray matter. Therefore, the libido wins! Link to post Share on other sites
Jinnah Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Well, even I disagree with that. It's not my business if my neighbor decides to have an affair with another neighbor. I wouldn't like to see it and it would bother me. I would feel that they were screwing up their lives (and the lives of other people), but it's not my business. But it's your business when a OW starts sleeping with your husband. Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X30 Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Um, no, I'm trying to say that it's up to God to judge (if that's your belief). Not for posters on a forum to say who is going to be damned and who isn't. Shucks, I guess I just didnt read that right then! Link to post Share on other sites
Jinnah Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 As far as the "evolution" men are "just sowing their seeds" comment, that's bs and everyone knows it. Next... Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 Well, actually, her statement is untrue. Like I said earlier, if you are with an honest man/woman, you can say for certain whether or not they have cheated on you. This is all rubbish anyway though, because the point of the thread was that an OW was saying the BS should not blame them, but as far as most people in our society agree, you can... it even says that in the dictionary for crying out loud. You OW can be in denial all you want so you don't have to feel bad about the horrendous things you are doing, but that doesn't make you right. OW should stop blaming everyone else in the world who things they are wrong. All I see is bitter OW (maybe b/c they know they are not the only one or b/c their MM won't leave his wife). The OW say the BS are bitter, but at least they are righteously bitter. But Annabelle is right... I did say that no one on this planet can affirm with absolutely NO doubt that their spouse has never cheated... That's total baloney.. unless you are with them 24/7 and under your eyes at all times... Sorry but such closeness doesn't exist... Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X30 Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 ummm, no, I didn't and no, I didn't. I admit when Im wrong...! You asked everyone to stop using bible verses... then used one. So yes you did! And it wasnt in its propper context... though that part is up for interpretation. Link to post Share on other sites
Jinnah Posted October 5, 2007 Share Posted October 5, 2007 But Annabelle is right... I did say that no one on this planet can affirm with absolutely NO doubt that their spouse has never cheated... That's total baloney.. unless you are with them 24/7 and under your eyes at all times... Sorry but such closeness doesn't exist... My spouse and I actually do know what the other is doing 24/7, and not in a psycho stalking way. If I called him right now, he would be at his desk (and no, it's not enclosed) and vise versa, well, I guess my position would be a bit more difficult b/c I'm at home, but he knows for a fact how religious I am and he knows I wouldn't risk my standing with God for some sex. Link to post Share on other sites
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