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GF doesn't like Marijuana


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Old 11th March 2019, 11:21 PM   #1
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Question GF doesn't like Marijuana

I love my GF will all my heart...but she can't seem to get over the fact that I smoke herb. Every 2 - 4 months we break up for a few days because of it.

From her own admission if she didn't smell it in my clothes she wouldn't know I was smoking. From her own admission she can't name one specific way in which weed has negatively influenced my life. I never smoke around her, nor would I ever.

I know 100% she is the one I want to marry. We have great discourse, out of this world sex, have the same goals, like the same food / movies / music. Marijuana is the ONLY thing we ever argue about. She's the only woman I've never even considered cheating on (in fact several of my exes call me or message me on FB regularly to ask if I want sex, "your GF won't know", but I always flatly refuse)

How do we come to a compromise on this? I can't imagine loosing the love on my life over something so stupid (and yes, saying that anything is bad without being able to cite a specific reason is STUPID. Be it a food, a video game or kind of behavior)

FYI: I don't just smoke to get high, I have medical reason also, not the least of which being that I have a brain tumor
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Old 11th March 2019, 11:29 PM   #2
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she does not want you to take your meds and yet says she loves you?

open your eyes
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Old 12th March 2019, 12:17 AM   #3
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If you need it medicinally, then perhaps medical marijuana with THCs removed is the compromise. Is medical marijuana legal where you live?
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Old 12th March 2019, 12:34 AM   #4
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Get some vape pens. No need to light it on fire anymore. That's barbaric
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Old 12th March 2019, 12:57 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Coup La-La View Post
How do we come to a compromise on this?
Hi Coup La-La, this is a ridiculously easy problem to solve. The compromise is that you stop smoking pot and get edibles or patches to treat your pain (the kind you don't get high off of).
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Old 12th March 2019, 1:02 AM   #6
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I agree about the vape pens, but Iím concerned that she breaks up with you over something you need medically. Big, fat red flag.
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Old 12th March 2019, 1:16 AM   #7
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Is medical marijuana legal where you live?
unfortunately no
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Old 12th March 2019, 1:17 AM   #8
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That's a damn good point

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Originally Posted by Mrin View Post
Get some vape pens. No need to light it on fire anymore. That's barbaric
Do they have a less pungent smell?
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Old 12th March 2019, 1:21 AM   #9
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I agree about the vape pens, but Iím concerned that she breaks up with you over something you need medically. Big, fat red flag.
That does scare me, especially now that I have a growth on my brain and have some important medical decisions coming up, and she's still bringing it up at every now and then. She just brought it up again today, and TBH I'm feeling really annoyed that she would bring this up when there are more important issues the require timely attention,
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Old 12th March 2019, 1:27 AM   #10
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Looking back at this thread from Dec 2016 She Doesn't Know I Smoke Weed you talk of daily recreational use, knowing that girls frequently don't like it and doing a 'bait and switch' so that your girlfriend falls for you before finding out. Nothing about a brain tumour.

If anyone needs to change, it's you. Had you not been deceptive about your use, you would have gotten a girlfriend who was OK with it. This situation you're in now is nothing more than consequence for your own behaviour.

Last edited by basil67; 12th March 2019 at 1:45 AM..
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Old 12th March 2019, 2:34 AM   #11
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Actually: She did know, she just didn't mention it. She went into our relationship with her eyes wide open

Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 12th March 2019 at 9:39 AM..
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Old 12th March 2019, 2:44 AM   #12
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But you didn't tell her how important it was to you, did you. You kept it under wraps.

At any rate, you made it clear in your previous post that you're a daily smoker and have zero intention of quitting. Not many would put up with someone who drank alcohol daily, and I really don't see the difference.

You talked of finding compromise, but your stance is extremely uncompromising. I think what you actually want is to find a way to make her accept it.

Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 12th March 2019 at 9:39 AM..
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Old 12th March 2019, 3:12 AM   #13
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Still public information

While no I didn't broadcast the fact that I smoke, I never made an effort to conceal it either. Looking at some of the pictures we exchanged when we first met, there were a couple that had my bong in the background. A few of my FB posts make reference to weed also. I though she didn't know because she never said anything about it, good or bad.

And let's keep it real: everyone has something they don't broadcast in the early days. I'm agnostic and she is super-duper Catholic, she didn't tell me about that when we met, I'm not thrilled about being in proximity to organized religion, or like the idea of having pictures of Jesus up in my house, but I realize that it's something very important to her, that helps her a lot, so I don't argue with her about it.

Marijuana has a long, long list of beneficial medical benefits, that get's longer everyday, whereas alcohol is technically poison. Alcohol can kill you, marijuana can't. Alcohol and violence are opposite sides of the same coin, every state that has legalized weed has seen a reduction in violent crime.

Me smoking everyday is more like diabetics who take insulin everyday, or people with heart disease that take blood thinners everyday (both of which can potently be lethal with improper use, unlike Marijuana, but nobody would call that and "addiction" or a "vice")

On the issue of compromise, I would be willing to set aside certain days of the week to not smoke, or certain times of the day [maybe only when she's asleep].

Last edited by LoveShack.org Moderator; 12th March 2019 at 9:39 AM..
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Old 12th March 2019, 3:53 AM   #14
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And what does she say about the your proposed compromise? And given that you weren't upfront with her in the beginning....and your obvious passion for the stuff....why would she trust that you would stay true to your word about lessening your use?
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Old 12th March 2019, 4:08 AM   #15
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OP, I'm agnostic and wouldn't really care about being in a relationship with a super [insert any religion here] if they don't preach at me on the daily, because I genuinely don't care. At all.

She seemingly cares about your daily use, therefore that's a problem.

Assuming she is not expecting you to quit cold turkey (which would be uncompromising on her part), all you can do is cut down or use vape pens or not smoke so much in front of her.

Or get a gf whom you'll be upfront with from the off.

Last edited by littleblackheart; 12th March 2019 at 4:17 AM..
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