Update: The Aftermath... A very changed life.

[EmotionallyYours]

OK, for better or worse I felt the need to post an update. I made some good decisions and a lot of bad ones. Some for the right reasons and some for the wrong. It has been a roller coaster ride, but I think things are evening out and I feel well enough to share my story.

 

The last anyone heard from me I was, on the cusp of an affair (EA turning PA), in the middle of a nervous breakdown, and probably not in my right mind. Looking back... well let's not do that.

 

I did it. I went through with the affair and created the nuclear explosion in my marriage. Although I was in a sense "caught", I had been slowly leaking information to my husband in an attempt to tell him anyway. I could not live with the guilt of lying to my husband or ignore my desire to leave the marriage. I truly wanted out of the marriage and had assumed that the affair would kill it. It didn't kill it for my husband. He still wanted me back.

 

Although I wanted out, the guilt weighed on me so deep that I felt that I had to give it one last shot. I could not put my heart into it though. I essentially did have a nervous breakdown because of my conflicting emotions of wanting to leave and the extreme shame and guilt of my actions. I felt so helpless and just wanted to hide. My husband was relentless in wanting to talk all the time and go over detail after detail into the wee hours of the morning. I was living on maybe 2-3 hours of sleep and everyone was in complete turmoil. My husband and my sister (who was staying with us when all hell broke loose) pretty much let everyone in the entire extended family on both sides know exactly what happened. I think that really put the last nail in the coffin and I fled. I moved out into my own condo the weekend after Thanksgiving.

 

First step was to go into some pretty intense therapy. I was in complete shock and really needed to talk A LOT with impartial third parties who could get me though the trauma. I was "officially" diagnosed as bipolar which I always think I knew, but never had it confirmed or treated. I immediately went on medication and actually went into a shell for a couple of weeks. I wouldn't "really" talk to anyone except my children or therapist (except at work of course). This was extremely frustrating to both my husband and OM. I really needed a break from all the chaos and needed to recover without anyone asking anything of me. Slowly, my brain slowed down and rational thought returned. I started to function again and was up to making decisions in my life again and actually trust my own thought process. I knew that until I was well enough and not in a manic or depressed state, that I would not be able to decide anything rationally.

 

In the end, the decision to leave my marriage was the right one (at least I think so). My husband is still devastated and still thinks that it is my bipolar disorder talking. He was 100% sure that once I was medicated and "myself" again, that I would come back to him. He was wrong though. Once I felt well enough again, I realized that I still did not love him as a wife loves a husband and still did not want to give it another try. At our best, we were friends. At our worst, I loathed him. Our relationship was so warped over the years into a father/child one rather than a husband/wife one that I became one of the children and allowed him to become the mother and father wrapped up into one package. I lost my confidence as a mother and a co-head of the household. I had become so withdrawn from the marriage that it began to affect my relationship with my children in that I avoided even being in the house. I think I could have given fixing things a shot maybe 7-10 years ago, but not now. There is nothing left there as far as feelings go to salvage. I am very sorry for the way I ended the relationship with my husband, but not that I DID end it. Plus, I really needed to repair and normalize my relationship with my kids. I had to become Mom again.

 

I now have joint-custody of the kids and the divorce will be final in about 3-4 months. I love my little condo and my orderly little life. I have rediscovered being a Mom, running a household and interacting with my children without dreading negative commentary on what I am doing how I am doing it... etc... I feel content and at ease for the first time in I don't know how long. I still get emotional from time to time over the guilt of how I went about things, but I feel like I have a life again. My kids are very happy to have their Mom back though. They talk to me so much more because they know that I am mentally "there" and interested in every little detail. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make my STBX husband feel the same as me. I do want him to be content and find happiness again. He is a very good father and I hope he finds a woman who he can communicate with, be happy with, and love. I didn't love him as a husband and certainly did not communicate properly. I hope he can find a woman who can. We both had faults and now that my guilt does not cloud everything, I realize that he really has to own up to his part of our marriage falling apart. Initially I took 100% of the blame because of the affair. Now I see that it really doesn't work that way. I was 100% wrong in doing what I did, but not 100% at fault for letting the marriage die in the first place.

 

The OM. Well, I initially decided to stop seeing him because although I really loved being around him and had a great time that it wouldn't work out with such a bad beginning. Plus, I doubted his ability to be mature and stable enough to be a long-term part of the new life I needed to build with my children. After all, it was just a fling to us. At least that is what we both said. I knew that I felt more, but I had no doubts that I was a fling to him. He did not take my decision not to see him well, but did abide by my wish to leave me alone for a while. He told me that he still wanted to see me and loved me. I did not take him seriously because I figured he just wanted to keep the fling alive. He was having fun and didn't want it to stop. I did not believe he could really care and love me enough for a long-term relationship. I believe now that was wrong on that count. I meant and do mean a lot more to him than I had imagined.

 

Time will tell of course whether or not we will work out. We have been seeing each other quite regularly and we still are having a lot of fun. He is still very passionate about our relationship and life in general. I am teaching him how to cook and he is trying to win me over to March Madness. He is so much more affectionate than I could have ever imagined and he respects my opinion and my abilities. He has been a pillar of support when times are rough and a surprisingly logical voice when I let my emotions get the best of me. I think I have truly fallen in love and I believe he truly loves me. Do I have doubts still? Yes.

 

We still have not ventured into the "real" world. I keep my life with the kids separate and only have integrated him into some parts of my life. Most people still don't know that we are together. In a few weeks, I am introducing him to my kids as my significant other. They have met him before as one of my friends and think he is a bit of a goofball (although they did really like him). The test is whether or not they will like him in this new capacity and whether or not he has the character to be strong and mature and the person I need to be a true partner in my life for the long-haul. The other big hurdle is my family (Mom/Dad/Sister). They have vowed they will never accept him because of how our relationship began. I understand how they feel, but I won't break off my relationship because of this. They have not been there to support me during a very difficult time. In fact, they had rallied around my ex and had cut off all contact with me for the first couple of months. They are now starting to come around now that they know that I am firm in my decision to divorce. In fact, being around my STBX more has really shed more light in their eyes on why I needed to leave. They finally see how he tries to control every aspect of me and my children's lives. I guess they didn't believe me for the last 10 years! Sheesh... However, I don't know if they will ever allow my OM into their lives. Time will only tell. Right now I am operating on a "Don't Ask Don't Tell" policy with Mom/Dad/Sister.

 

The OM has surpassed my expectations every step of the way these last couple of months. I really hope it continues. I also hope I am strong enough to say goodbye if it really doesn't work out and he is not a good fit with my kids and my future. I am hoping for the best but preparing for the worst.

 

Well, that's it. It is what it is. I can only try to make the "what will be" the best it can be from this point forward. I will take it day by day and I know that the right path will become more and more clear as time goes on. Right now, I just can't obsess on the past or worry about unknowns in the future. I just have to live my life as best I can in the here and now.

 

-EY

 

Disclaimer: I know what I did was completely wrong and although I now think that everything is working out for the best I do not recommend going about it the way I did. I was weak and cowardly. In fact, I caution people about using this forum as too much of a crutch. If you have the feelings that I did, try to talk to your husband/wife instead. I needed to seek counseling for myself and my marriage a very long time ago. If you think you are heading in that direction, seek help. You may either be able to save your marriage or leave it in a way that allows you to feel proud of yourself.

[Kasan]

I remember you and Ookla2 very well from last fall. It takes real courage to come back and update your situation, and it's really good to hear that emotionally you are doing so much better.

 

Be well!

[Trialbyfire]

Sounds like things really blew up.

 

One thing I'm really confused about is, how are you able to get a divorce so quickly, when just cause isn't on your side and your STXH, wants to hold onto you?

[EmotionallyYours]

Sounds like things really blew up.

 

One thing I'm really confused about is, how are you able to get a divorce so quickly, when just cause isn't on your side and your STXH, wants to hold onto you?

 

Well, it is a little weird. My STXH and I have been in mediation since mid-January. Although he did/does not want to divorce, he has agreed to move forward. He has accepted that it is over and I will not come back. He is still deeply hurt and in therapy himself. In fact, I've gone to one of his sessions to help him with his counselor so she has a little more insight to help him. I have been wanting this for so long that I was a lot further in the mental separation process than he was. He understands that. Unfortunately it doesn't soothe his hurt. We have a MSA done and is now being approved by both of our lawyers. Barring anything unexpected from his side we will file and then it will be final in 90 days.

[daisygirl]

I'm fairly new here, so I don't know your whole back story, but I wanted to say thank you for sharing this. I can definitely relate to a lot of what you went through. I am glad you are doing better. Good luck to you!

[Ladyjane14]

I wish I could wave a magic wand and make my STBX husband feel the same as me. I do want him to be content and find happiness again.

 

Most likely, he'll be fine... just as soon as he meets somebody new. Men who've been in bad marriages, ones where they haven't had their emotional needs met in a long, long time are kind of like dessicated sponges. Usually, all it takes is for a new woman to come and "pour some on 'em", and they bounce back just fine. All that's left for you to do is to hope it's a good woman, because when they've lived in the desert so long, they respond to just about ANY female attention in much the same way.

 

Now, all that said... don't expect him to EVER truly forgive you. You've burnt through roughly two decades of his life, good years which he might have spent with someone who truly cared about him. Even so, things will probably cook along fairly easy for awhile, at least once he gets used to the idea. But when he finally does meet "Miss Wonderful", you're going to be viewed through the rose-colored lens he sees her through, and be found wanting all over again.

 

Your best bet for getting through all that... is to not make a big pill of yourself between now and then. Because once he's really moved on with someone else, he's going to remember every single grief you ever caused him.

[EmotionallyYours]

Most likely, he'll be fine... just as soon as he meets somebody new. Men who've been in bad marriages, ones where they haven't had their emotional needs met in a long, long time are kind of like dessicated sponges. Usually, all it takes is for a new woman to come and "pour some on 'em", and they bounce back just fine. All that's left for you to do is to hope it's a good woman, because when they've lived in the desert so long, they respond to just about ANY female attention in much the same way.

 

Now, all that said... don't expect him to EVER truly forgive you. You've burnt through roughly two decades of his life, good years which he might have spent with someone who truly cared about him. Even so, things will probably cook along fairly easy for awhile, at least once he gets used to the idea. But when he finally does meet "Miss Wonderful", you're going to be viewed through the rose-colored lens he sees her through, and be found wanting all over again.

 

Your best bet for getting through all that... is to not make a big pill of yourself between now and then. Because once he's really moved on with someone else, he's going to remember every single grief you ever caused him.

 

Thanks LJ. I am doing my best. I have probably actually let him have too much control because my guilty feelings and because I didn't want to rock the boat. I do worry about the next woman. I was his first real relationship which makes this even worse for him. He told me he loved me after 3 days (I was 19 and he was 23). We both had/have issues. I just hope he is being honest in therapy and really thinking things through so he doesn't just dive into another bad relationship.

 

Right now he is still in "I will always be alone" mode, but the girls did say he met a cute girl at the airport. lol. He was mortified because it didn't fit with everything he's been saying to me about how he will never pursue a relationship again. I just let it drop FAST so he didn't feel uncomfortable. I believe that showing a bit of interest in the opposite sex is something he mentally needs right now.

[ookla_2]

EY, I'm so glad you updated!! I've been in hiding myself, just reading but never posting anymore. It's too painful at times, and inviting criticism when I was beating up myself just didn't seem helpful to me anymore. (Kasan, thanks for the shout out!)

 

I'm SO incredibly sorry for how painful the last few months have been for you, EY!! I have to say that I had a hard time reading your story and talking to you because I SO dreaded what I knew was inevitably coming and I knew that I was in no position to "talk sense" to you. I'm so proud of you for taking the steps that you NEEDED to take to make yourself better! I am currently STILL living in the limbo hell, and unable to make myself take the steps that I know need to be taken. I'm still operating under the immense guilt of the EA (that came closer to becoming a PA than I ever let on), and trying to keep everyone else happy. Not doing a very good job of it because I am still so miserable, without really any good reason.

 

Okay, so I'm NOT going to t/j. I'm just going to say that yes, I agree, you went about getting out of your marriage the wrong way, just as you said. But you are so brave to look at your problem in the face, admit everything, and face everyone after the fact. I'm not going to call you my hero, but I am going to say that your response to the crisis that the situation became is very admirable.

 

I'm happy that you and your girls are doing so well. I know that was a major concern for you, as it is also one for me. Keep hanging in there, EY. One foot in front of the other, that's all we can do sometimes, but we must keep doing it.

 

(hugs)

 

Ookla

[EmotionallyYours]

EY, I'm so glad you updated!! I've been in hiding myself, just reading but never posting anymore. It's too painful at times, and inviting criticism when I was beating up myself just didn't seem helpful to me anymore. (Kasan, thanks for the shout out!)

 

I'm SO incredibly sorry for how painful the last few months have been for you, EY!! I have to say that I had a hard time reading your story and talking to you because I SO dreaded what I knew was inevitably coming and I knew that I was in no position to "talk sense" to you. I'm so proud of you for taking the steps that you NEEDED to take to make yourself better! I am currently STILL living in the limbo hell, and unable to make myself take the steps that I know need to be taken. I'm still operating under the immense guilt of the EA (that came closer to becoming a PA than I ever let on), and trying to keep everyone else happy. Not doing a very good job of it because I am still so miserable, without really any good reason.

 

Okay, so I'm NOT going to t/j. I'm just going to say that yes, I agree, you went about getting out of your marriage the wrong way, just as you said. But you are so brave to look at your problem in the face, admit everything, and face everyone after the fact. I'm not going to call you my hero, but I am going to say that your response to the crisis that the situation became is very admirable.

 

I'm happy that you and your girls are doing so well. I know that was a major concern for you, as it is also one for me. Keep hanging in there, EY. One foot in front of the other, that's all we can do sometimes, but we must keep doing it.

 

(hugs)

 

Ookla

 

You were smart not to talk to me too much you know. I was a VERY bad influence at the time and am not proud of the way I was acting. My immaturity was appalling. I still feel very badly about everything, but I am allowing myself to be happy again. Especially when I'm I'm with the girls!

I'm even baking cookies! They thought only their Dad could do that...lol. I'm also becoming quite the gourmet chef! The nights when I'm not cooking for the kids, I have rediscovered my love for experimenting with food. They girls aren't as adventurous so I wait until I have a proven recipe before I try it out on them.

 

I hope you find a way to tackle your problems soon. You need some relief from your feelings. You know I know how you feel!

 

Missed you. So glad to hear from you. Be good ;-)

[ookla_2]

I missed you too! Can I PM you again?

[EmotionallyYours]

I remember you and Ookla2 very well from last fall. It takes real courage to come back and update your situation, and it's really good to hear that emotionally you are doing so much better.

 

Be well!

 

Thanks Kasan. I really appreciate it. I really am focusing on being well and hope that I make great strides to become the person I want to be. I can't erase the mistakes, but I can be better. The kids will probably want more of an explanation when they get older and I will be honest about my mistakes, but I want them to be proud of my actions after the fact at least.

[EmotionallyYours]

You can always PM me! You should know that...lol.

 

I missed you too! Can I PM you again?

[Arch]

I would hate to have been your husband, 20 years gone....

 

I hope all works out for you.

[Cobra_X30]

Disclaimer: I know what I did was completely wrong and although I now think that everything is working out for the best I do not recommend going about it the way I did. I was weak and cowardly. In fact, I caution people about using this forum as too much of a crutch. If you have the feelings that I did, try to talk to your husband/wife instead. I needed to seek counseling for myself and my marriage a very long time ago. If you think you are heading in that direction, seek help. You may either be able to save your marriage or leave it in a way that allows you to feel proud of yourself.

 

I'm glad your free!

 

I'm also sorry things happened the way that they did.

 

Best of Luck to you EY!

[annieo]

And BTW, my kids are doing well, have adapted amazingly (7 years later, if things were going to go nuclear, I would have noticed), have a warm relationship with their stepdad, prefer to be with us rather than dad (who has calmed down due to having a very nice and good for him girlfriend for the past 3 years) because he is still a nitpicking pain, with them as he used to be with me. I can't know for sure, but I suspect they would have been more screwed up having to live in a house where mom and dad were cold, disrespectful and at war. I know it ain't perfect, but it seems to be working.

[silktricks]

EY - you've come a long way. I hope things work out well for you. As you've said repeatedly, you've made a lot of mistakes along the way, but all of our lives are full of mistakes. The key is to learn and not repeat them. It sounds like you won't.

 

Hopefully your STBX will be able to move on in his life and also learn from his mistakes as well. As you said, no one person is ever solely to blame for the disolution of a marriage.

 

It's been said here by a few people that he's wasted 20 years. Obviously, that is not true. You've both learned, and you've made wonderful children. Life spent is not life wasted. Everything we do, every contact we make forms us and changes us. That isn't waste.

 

Best of luck to you in the future.

[EmotionallyYours]

And BTW, my kids are doing well, have adapted amazingly (7 years later, if things were going to go nuclear, I would have noticed), have a warm relationship with their stepdad, prefer to be with us rather than dad (who has calmed down due to having a very nice and good for him girlfriend for the past 3 years) because he is still a nitpicking pain, with them as he used to be with me. I can't know for sure, but I suspect they would have been more screwed up having to live in a house where mom and dad were cold, disrespectful and at war. I know it ain't perfect, but it seems to be working.

 

Thanks for your story. I was writing a reply and didn't see it until now. I have so many mixed emotions at times, but have come to the conclusion that I am doing the right thing now according to the bad circumstances. There is no way to be 100% sure, but I'm as sure as I can get.

[Arch]

lol, the type of man who has sex with a married women is the type of man who wont have a problem cheating on that women if they ever do get married.

[TheRain]

lol, the type of man who has sex with a married women is the type of man who wont have a problem cheating on that women if they ever do get married.

 

That's exactly correct. The OP will always wonder when OM is not in her presence. It might not happen a year from now, maybe not even 3 years from now, but 5, 10, ..years down the road. Deep down, your OM knows and will always remember what you did and when the opportunity is right for him to hook up with another woman, whether she's single or married, he is not going to respect you (because what you did to your then husband) or he is going to use that as an excuse or both.

 

Can you honestly trust him to be faithful as much as you did with say your (ex)husband?

Edited March 21, 2008 by TheRain

[Meaplus3]

First of all.. I am here... you can speak directly to me. As if I haven't already tried to unsuccessfully suppress my regrets and shame of what I have done that and still do go into some depression over it. Of course I know what people think of me. Hello... I may have been a cheater... but I am NOT a cold bitch with no moral compass at all. I was not cut out for the extended deception and everything else. I took the cowardly way out of a relationship that I didn't want to be in. I tried to kill it since I couldn't bring myself to do it the "right" way no matter how much I wanted to.

 

 

 

Secondly, who sid that I am "pretending" that anything is normal. I have had discussions with my kids regarding how wrong I was to not communicate with their father about my unhappiness. That I should have been open and honest with my feelings so that I could not have feelings for someone else. I didn't know what else to do considering that everything was told to them despite my wishes. I told them the truth as best I could according to their ages with my husband sitting there with me. I told the truth according to his wishes since he assured me that "the books" or whatever he read said it was the way to handle it. They absolutely know how I regret the things that I did and that I am ashamed. They also should not be in a position to have to decide whether or not to confide in their friends about their mother having an affair. It is truly appalling, but it is the reality right now.

 

Finally, yes the relationship was initially based on lust, adultery and yes has caused scars. However, I do love this man deeply and I do not have doubts that he feels the same about me. When it initially happened, I can't say that I was in love with him. In fact, I was dumbfounded as to what to say when it was told to the kids that I "fell in love" with another man. The man I love now is so far from the man I thought I had an affair with. He stepped up to the plate for me when I was in agony and pain no matter how much I tried to push him away he was patiently there or patiently stayed away according to my wishes. He encouraged me to try to work it out with my H if it was what I really wanted. I hated him as much as myself for going along with it and not resisting as well. I did my best to push him away as well. I was determined to end up without either of them at that point.

 

I am now "dating" or seeing him as normally as I can under the circumstances. You can mock me for my feelings that I love him or that "we are special" or whatever... but it just isn't as simple as you present it. I pray that you never are put in a situation of tempation. If you are, I hope that you resist. If you ever make a mistake of the magnitude I did, I hope that you do not have people to condemn you. I hope you have people to love and support you and to make the right decisions when you are under extreme duress. Yes, I brought it on myself. I know that. But I also can't go on hating myself forever either. I have to find my way back out.

 

 

Hi EY, You know..I am just going to say this as brief as I can..I respect the fact that you have realized that you don't love your H.. and you are willing to set him free to find another. If you don't love someone then there is no reason to stay with them. Don't worry if you went about this the wrong way.. that does not matter at this point. You need to focus on your children and moving forward.. healing for you all. NO one is perfect in life.. we all make mistakes. I wish you the best.. And my heart really hurt when I read a few comment's that were left for you earlier that I felt were much to harsh. Best of luck.Hang in there.

 

AP:)

[EmotionallyYours]

That's exactly correct. The OP will always wonder when OM is not in her presence. It might not happen a year from now, maybe not even 3 years from now, but 5, 10, ..years down the road. Deep down, your OM knows and will always remember what you did and when the opportunity is right for him to hook up with another woman, whether she's single or married, he is not going to respect you (because what you did to your then husband) or he is going to use that as an excuse or both.

 

Can you honestly trust him to be faithful as much as you did with say your (ex)husband?

 

Using this reasoning I can never be trusted again in my life either. I guess I should just give up on everything now. Thanks for shedding light. I might as well go off myself now. I will never be worthy for anyone ever again.

 

Listen, I understand where you are all coming from, but I would like to hear something other than the predictable condemnation. Actually the black/white, good/evil people on this site are very much like my husband. It is his attitudes and easy judgment of me and others that left me always on edge. I will never see things exactly like you do or as he does. Yes, I do agree on what is right and wrong, but I also want to understand why I and others do the things they do. It is this attitude of my husband's that so often prevented us from resolving problems. He was right. I was wrong. No compromise or at least trying to respect or understand underlying opinions and/or problems.

[TheRain]

Using this reasoning I can never be trusted again in my life either. I guess I should just give up on everything now. Thanks for shedding light. I might as well go off myself now. I will never be worthy for anyone ever again.

 

Listen, I understand where you are all coming from, but I would like to hear something other than the predictable condemnation. Actually the black/white, good/evil people on this site are very much like my husband. It is his attitudes and easy judgment of me and others that left me always on edge. I will never see things exactly like you do or as he does. Yes, I do agree on what is right and wrong, but I also want to understand why I and others do the things they do. It is this attitude of my husband's that so often prevented us from resolving problems. He was right. I was wrong. No compromise or at least trying to respect or understand underlying opinions and/or problems.

 

I thought at some point, you expressed that you're sorry for what you did and you regretted the cheating. But, now it seems to me that you're shifting the blame to your husband or "people like me" and trying to not owning up to your actions. You know what you did was wrong, if you stop recognizing it internally, you will be angry and resent yourself or people surround you. That's almost an guarantee. You can always justify it externally, but deep inside, you can't reconcile it.

[stampdaddy]

Using this reasoning I can never be trusted again in my life either. I guess I should just give up on everything now. Thanks for shedding light. I might as well go off myself now. I will never be worthy for anyone ever again.

 

Listen, I understand where you are all coming from, but I would like to hear something other than the predictable condemnation. Actually the black/white, good/evil people on this site are very much like my husband. It is his attitudes and easy judgment of me and others that left me always on edge. I will never see things exactly like you do or as he does. Yes, I do agree on what is right and wrong, but I also want to understand why I and others do the things they do. It is this attitude of my husband's that so often prevented us from resolving problems. He was right. I was wrong. No compromise or at least trying to respect or understand underlying opinions and/or problems.

 

One step at a time, inch by inch if you have too.... then one day at a time.. IT WILL ALL WORK OUT, there is NO OTHER CHOICE.. chin up, little pig

[Lookingforward]

I call Bull**** again ...SOMEONE has to have the freakin DECENCY to keep the OM away from your kids....I guess I shouldn't be surprised to see that you don't have that kind of decency.

 

Your STBX is a beaten man. His emotions are all jacked around and unstable now (a situation created by YOU....nice work lady) so his insistence on the kids meeting the OM is not to be considered here.

 

You're just plain STUPID to think that introducing your kids to the guy who basically booted their dad out of their lives will have any kind of positive (or even neutral) affect on them...

 

Listen to me here:

 

The relationship with the OM is doomed. Sooner or later it will CRASH AND BURN. Affairs that end marriages fail miserably in more than 80% of all cases. What...do you think you two are "special" or "different"??? You think that "this time" it's for real??? Puhleeeees!

 

What you're about to do is kick your father out of your kids lives, then introduce 'this other guy'....then eventually (more likely sooner than later) that other guy will be gone too.

 

And in the end all you will have done is F--k with your kids heads. You're classic...Just classic.

 

HTF do you sleep at night or look at yourself in the mirror?

 

If there is any kind of real justice in this world your husband will get custody of your kids. It's clear that you have no idea what is really in their best interests.

 

Like I said....You can't fix stupid

 

 

Hope you get therapy for those anger issues and SOON

[TheRain]

Listen, I understand where you are all coming from, but I would like to hear something other than the predictable condemnation.

 

I would like to hear that I am the male version of mother Theresa. But, that's not the fact, and someone telling me that I am a saint doesn't make me a saint. Do you want to hear lies or sugarcoated, meaningless praises or the truth?