MissJoness Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Yeah, how do you solve this dilemma? anyone ever had this problem and finally found a way to have happiness in relationships? Link to post Share on other sites
bayouboi Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 That's easy, lower your standards! badump ching! Link to post Share on other sites
Author MissJoness Posted February 10, 2010 Author Share Posted February 10, 2010 Yeah but what if that doesn't make you happy either? Link to post Share on other sites
bayouboi Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Yeah but what if that doesn't make you happy either? Then, my friend, you (like me) are f****d... only not in the good way! badump ching! Link to post Share on other sites
counterman Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Find someone you like that does like you back. Link to post Share on other sites
paleblue Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 This is exactly what happens to me! they like me, I don’t like them, I like them, they don’t like me. it is wacked. I guess we need to find a way to reverse polarity or something. Link to post Share on other sites
bayouboi Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 This is exactly what happens to me! they like me, I don’t like them, I like them, they don’t like me. it is wacked. I guess we need to find a way to reverse polarity or something. That's easy, use magnets! badump ching! Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 You would definitely have to lower your standards or be alone forever. Link to post Share on other sites
Lakeside_runner Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Um, don't necessarily lower your standards... It may also depend on what you have to offer. Maybe work on yourself a little? Work out, learn something new... Link to post Share on other sites
paleblue Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 here's a thought. import a wife? they love you long time. Link to post Share on other sites
vanilla87 Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 one sure bet is to go to places you wouldn't think twice about going to for events or of social gatherings of sorts. Try a fund raiser or a something that has live music. The guy I met three months ago, I met at a charity benefit at a local firehouse... ironically we both went to the same high school, graduated together. Yet never spoken a word to each other, never had a class together, but had a lot of the same friends. He really wasn't my type, but i took a chance, now he is wayyy more of my type, because I got to know him. My point is, take a chance on someone you wouldn't think twice about too. You never know, that could be the one person you could end up being happy with... Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Um, don't necessarily lower your standards... It may also depend on what you have to offer. Maybe work on yourself a little? Work out, learn something new... One has no other choice but to lower their standards if everyone they like doesn't like them. Like Vanilla said, take a chance on someone you wouldn't think twice about, it could end up being your true love. Link to post Share on other sites
Johnny M Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 You solve this "dilemma" by taking long, hard look in the mirror and drawing the necessary conclusions. Link to post Share on other sites
greatgirlfriend Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 This has been my problem since I was a teenager. Everytime I developed a crush they never liked me back. It had nothing to do with standards because I am pretty and many of the guys weren't really cute. My solution? I stopped developing crushes on guys, and when I did I realized it wasn't probably going to work. Instead I now find myself developing crushes after I really get to know a guy and know he likes me. Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 Yeah, how do you solve this dilemma? anyone ever had this problem and finally found a way to have happiness in relationships? I have this same problem, and I dont know if there is an answer. I also get the "lower you standards" line. Why, so I can go through life with someone I'm not really attracted to? Sounds like alot fun to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Lakeside_runner Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 One has no other choice but to lower their standards if everyone they like doesn't like them. Like Vanilla said, take a chance on someone you wouldn't think twice about, it could end up being your true love. Ok, if the standards are ridiculously high then yeah - you've got to lower them. But there is nothing wrong with a simultaneous improvement of your qualities right? It may take some time but - hit the gym, pick up some hobbies etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Johnny M Posted February 10, 2010 Share Posted February 10, 2010 I have this same problem, and I dont know if there is an answer. I also get the "lower you standards" line. Why, so I can go through life with someone I'm not really attracted to? Sounds like alot fun to me. It could be that you have an inflated sense of self worth, like a lot of people these days (that's what happens when you get the idea that 'you are special in your own way' hammered into your head since early childhood). Once you realize that you are not quite the hot sh*t you thought you were, you would be quite happy with a guy/gal who is just as average as you are. Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 It could be that you have an inflated sense of self worth, like a lot of people these days (that's what happens when you get the idea that 'you are special in your own way' hammered into your head since early childhood). Once you realize that you are not quite the hot sh*t you thought you were, you would be quite happy with a guy/gal who is just as average as you are. Not so JohnnyM. At least not in my case. I'm not out chasing down super models and I don't think I am hot sh*t. I just can't settle, I cant lie to myself and say ok I'll just happy with a girl I have no attraction for. It really has less to do with looks than the way she carrys herself, do we get along, is she fun to be with etc....I probably am just "average". I'm just curious how you could know that having never met or spoken to me Link to post Share on other sites
Eeyore79 Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 The people you like don't like you because you don't meet their standards, and those who do like you don't meet your standards? Sounds like you're aiming a bit out of your league if all the people you like don't like you back. You probably have an inflated sense of your own attractiveness and worth; lower your standards a little and maybe you might get on ok with some of the people within your league who do like you. Link to post Share on other sites
AD1980 Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 I have this same problem, and I dont know if there is an answer. I also get the "lower you standards" line. Why, so I can go through life with someone I'm not really attracted to? Sounds like alot fun to me. Same here if id rather be alone then with someone i have zero physical attraction for but settled because it was in my "league" Link to post Share on other sites
engravefeelthevoid Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 keep working on urself untill people start liking you...seems like the girls who like u have low standards (no offense) but the girls u like are of high standards...thats normal we all want the best....so work on urself to get girls from the scale u want Link to post Share on other sites
Lakeside_runner Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 keep working on urself untill people start liking you...seems like the girls who like u have low standards (no offense) but the girls u like are of high standards...thats normal we all want the best....so work on urself to get girls from the scale u want Finally! Someone who has the same point of view! Yup! There are two ways: 1. Easy: lower your standards - are you going to be happy with what you get? 2. Hard: work on yourself - you never know where this may lead you! I opted for 2 and think it pays off... Link to post Share on other sites
gypsy_nicky Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 OP, does this happen at the early stages of meeting the person/s or when you've gotten to know them? Link to post Share on other sites
Enema Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 Most likely, you over-rate your own appeal to the opposite sex. A hard thing to realize in yourself and change. Two options: 1) Raise your appeal 2) Lower your standards Edit: Damnit lakeside, stop posting my stuff before i post it. Link to post Share on other sites
Lakeside_runner Posted February 11, 2010 Share Posted February 11, 2010 Most likely, you over-rate your own appeal to the opposite sex. A hard thing to realize in yourself and change. Two options: 1) Raise your appeal 2) Lower your standards Edit: Damnit lakeside, stop posting my stuff before i post it. Haha! OK. Link to post Share on other sites
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