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Woman rejected me because I am white.


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Old 11th May 2016, 4:05 PM   #61
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Do nothing...IF she rejected you just because you caught her off guard , she'll think about it and let you know. If she's just really not interested then you need to let the whole thing drop. Workplace relationships/dating etc...are bad news to start with. If she doesn't date white men then that's her perogative. many people of all races don't date out of their race or prefer dating a specific race etc..... don't try to push the issue with her either. That'll just run her off.
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Old 11th May 2016, 4:16 PM   #62
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Like others said or implied, she's probably just dialing it back bc you 'went there' and she suddenly feels uncomfy w/the dynamics, particularly at work. It's no big deal really. I understand you'd want some resolution or whatever but if she's not offering any, that's that. Just give her back what she gives you and respect the buffer zone if she feels like she has to have it.
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Old 11th May 2016, 7:06 PM   #63
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Thanks much again everyone.

@Gloria sorry meant to say maybe she felt out of "my" league. Sorry to hear about why you don't date anymore. I know I am young, but imo and little experience in comparison there is no template for love. That's why you see and question why super hot chicks are with older fat ugly dudes and like in my case a younger guy with an older frumpy baggage collector. It's more then about money, looks, and status. Sure it's not that way for everyone, some people go after looks money and status but in that end more then likely true happiness will not be present.

Love is the most unique experience human beings can experience, that's why some stay in abusive relationship whether it's emotional, mental, or physical or combined. My cousin who is a twin and is more built and muscular then me and married a 40 something when he was 29 and she had 3 kids one who was 22 I think and a woman at that. His wife was real ugly though with missing teeth and all that. At least my woman is average looking even though I see her as more beautiful then that.

I wish people would stop commenting on the racist thing that's not what I meant. I said upon first rejection that was my first thought for like 2 seconds because I got defensive.

I like all types of woman though, this woman at work just had caught my interest. Every woman has their own "thing" there is no template for that. I have been attracted to a wide range of woman in my life with various physical characteristics. The woman just has to carry it well. Confidence, independence, and knowing what they want are huge turn ons for me. They still need to be wanted to be held by a man though to make them feel extra safe and secure. Independent, but still in need of a soul mate.
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Old 12th May 2016, 5:18 PM   #64
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What about the love stories of people who kept pursuing their crush after countless rejections and then one time a yes is answered and they live happily ever after.

Is that not a thing?
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Old 12th May 2016, 5:23 PM   #65
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What about the love stories of people who kept pursuing their crush after countless rejections and then one time a yes is answered and they live happily ever after.

Is that not a thing?
Yeah, just like what happened to Forrest Gump...He chases her around for years while she is in her prime, she is banging everyone and their brother, while she pats him on the head and gives him a hug...

Then, when she is busted out, dead broke, and has an incurable illness, she proclaims she loves him ....

Just like that??

TFY
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Old 12th May 2016, 5:25 PM   #66
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What about the love stories of people who kept pursuing their crush after countless rejections and then one time a yes is answered and they live happily ever after.

Is that not a thing?
Mainly in fairy tales so please don't pin your hopes on that happening one day with this woman .
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Old 12th May 2016, 5:30 PM   #67
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What about the love stories of people who kept pursuing their crush after countless rejections and then one time a yes is answered and they live happily ever after.

Is that not a thing?
Dude, are you so lonely that this older woman - with baggage, who isn't even attractive - is the only person available?

Do you live in a small town or something?

I mean, now this thread is taking a different turn.

As I posted about you upset over "rejection". I highly recommend you look at this and why you want "her" so badly, cuz if you're all that and a bag of chips, then her rejecting you should be dust off of your shoulders.

Seriously, I think this is past you actually wanting "her" and is turning into an obsessive, dark thing.
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Old 12th May 2016, 5:43 PM   #68
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Lol no, I am just asking and learning from this experience. It is very odd and weird for me. I am just trying to figure it all out now.

No I am from a major city in New York state. It's not about that though. Not every fish in the sea is the same, some taste better then others, some make great trophies, some are fun to reel in.

It's complicated, I would not say I was struck by cupid but she is definitely different from other woman and maybe that's why I am still stuck because I feel it should have been easy because of both of our circumstances so I am caught off guard and hurt and I suppose I don't like feeling this way nor deserve it. I act all chill at work and around her but she seems the one acting different and it hurts me more and I would like to remedy it and I don't feel ignoring it or a lack of communication is the medication.

I am complicated and intricate sorry.
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Old 12th May 2016, 6:54 PM   #69
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REJECTION TYPE #3 – TESTING REJECTION

An incongruent rejection occurs when you were talking to a girl who seemed into you but then she tells you that it’s a “no-go”. Maybe she’ll tell you that she has got a boyfriend or that you just aren’t her type. This kind of rejection is actually one of the most difficult for guys to deal with because just when you think you are gonna get somewhere with a girl it feels like you got the rug pulled out from under you.

My suggestion when you meet with this kind of rejection is to push on and keep going for it anyways. A lot of times this is what I call “fake-rejection” because it’s really just an attempt to see how interested and confident you are. If you give up at the first sign of resistance, you fail the test.

So a lot of times pushing through will actually get you the girl, plus as a bonus you will become more confident because you will be training yourself to stare rejection in the face and not back down from it.

I remember a time when I went for a kiss with a girl, and she turned away and said “no, we have the same friends, it will be awkward.”

I replied “I don’t care about our friends, I care about you, and it’ll be amazing”.

And of course we kissed each other ��

Women find this kind of dominance very attractive. As I say in many of our premium training courses, “there’s nothing more arousing for a woman than to be desired by a man who she values.”


So I just found this, what yall think?

Also can you send private messages on here and if yes how?

Last edited by ashteller; 12th May 2016 at 6:57 PM..
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Old 12th May 2016, 7:12 PM   #70
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I think anyone who wants to play mind games and test a persons willingness to diligently and persistently pursue them isn't worthy of my time.

Yes, PM's are allowed, but I think you have to have like 50 posts and have been a member for at least a month .
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Old 12th May 2016, 7:24 PM   #71
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...So I just found this, what yall think?...

I think the MGTOW/PUA/MGA site is just interested in getting your money and so will tell you whatever you want to read/hear, just to get it.


Oh, and I think their advice goes right out the window in this particular situation; you didn't meet this woman at a nightclub/movie theatre/street faire...you met her at work.

Successful sexual harassment lawsuits in the workplace carry much greater penalties and have much different criteria than successful sexual harassment lawsuits elsewhere.

Does your current supervisor know about your titillation - bordering on obsession - with a co-worker? [To your knowledge,] does the HR department?
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Old 12th May 2016, 7:43 PM   #72
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The site had nothing for sale.

Not sure about the supervisor or HR thing though. I know the entire office knows about my crush for this woman but I don't know if they know about the rejection.

I don't understand about the sexual harassment though. I am not propositioning her or making any kind of inappropriate comments, I told her I like her and would like to get to know her more outside of work. I am not going to bug her on a daily or weekly basis. Me trying again might be in the future but I am actually tired of all this work my effort and energy should be focused on something realistic.

My concern now is the awkwardness, I just want to talk about it with her to get it out there. It's not me being obsessed, it's me being selfish and wanting to get it off my chest and to get rid of that freaking fat pink elephant that's always there with us.

No more work relationships, all woman will be denied. I regret even asking.
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Old 12th May 2016, 7:57 PM   #73
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Thanks all for the help sorry for being stubborn and resistant. I am just a very persistent person and I try my best to keep the fat lady from singing.

Appreciate the responses and you guys caring to post. I learned well and most everyone was in sync with their messages and points.

Not my intention to get weird there, just wanted to see how far people accept the tolerance.

Peace.
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Old 12th May 2016, 7:59 PM   #74
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The site had nothing for sale.

Not sure about the supervisor or HR thing though. I know the entire office knows about my crush for this woman but I don't know if they know about the rejection.

I don't understand about the sexual harassment though. I am not propositioning her or making any kind of inappropriate comments, I told her I like her and would like to get to know her more outside of work. I am not going to bug her on a daily or weekly basis. Me trying again might be in the future but I am actually tired of all this work my effort and energy should be focused on something realistic.

My concern now is the awkwardness, I just want to talk about it with her to get it out there. It's not me being obsessed, it's me being selfish and wanting to get it off my chest and to get rid of that freaking fat pink elephant that's always there with us.

No more work relationships, all woman will be denied. I regret even asking.
Sexual harassment includes repeated and "unwanted" contact. No, it doesn't matter if you're not asking her for sex, showing her your penis, etc....it matters that you insist on contact with her after she said "no" to your advances.

And unfortunately sexual harassment is in the eyes of the victim. So, while you may just wanna see a "Hi" as a "Hi", she may see it as you not letting her go after she told you that she wasn't interested.

Now, if it goes to court, nah, no court would call this harassment...but, at your job, they don't want drama and/or exposure to wasting money in litigation, so they probably are gonna write you up or fire you.

Dude, sometimes we don't get "closure"...so yes, unfortunately from now on she sees you as some guy who won't leave her alone and the more attempts you make to jusr "clear the air" right now when things are hot, the more you're gonna freak her out.

The best thing you can do is stop trying to talk to her. Maybe one day you can resurrect a working relationship with her again...right now, stay away.

Trust me, I know. I have my neighbor running and telling his wife that I'm chasing him and gosh I was so angry that I just wish she would say something to me so I could just lay it on her that he's the one obsessing over me...but dude, I decided it is safer for "me" to keep my distance from them. I don't go near that house unless I am forced to walk/drive there. I stay the heck out of their way. I deep down inside know the truth, and that's what matters.
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Old 12th May 2016, 7:59 PM   #75
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Let it go, Ash.

You casually mentioned getting to know her outside of work, she rejected your proposition and gave a reason for doing so. She's keeping a safe distance and healthy professional perspective so that you don't have further inclinations to pursue any advances moving forward. That is your closure. Stirring the shytepot will only cause a stink, so there's no need to rehash or set anything straight. Go in, do your job, don't do or say anything that could be misconstrued in a sexual context, and leave. Find someone outside of work, occupy your time, hang out with some friends...do something productive that takes your mind off this so that you can move on. Whether you realize it or not, she can probably sense your desire to address this situation even though you think you are playing it cool, and all she wants is for this hatchet to be buried and never resurrected again. Trust me, leave it alone.
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