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Wierd Breakup out of the blue [UPDATE: Horrible coping 6 months]


Breaks and Breaking Up It happens to most everyone at some point in life! Share your experiences!

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Old 30th September 2017, 2:15 PM   #61
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Originally Posted by Woodburner View Post
How can a woman move on so easily? Just boom gone?
Women - and men - who move on easily are already long gone emotionally by the time they end the relationship.
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Old 30th September 2017, 2:42 PM   #62
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Originally Posted by Woodburner View Post
How can a woman move on so easily? Just boom gone?
You can literally drive yourself crazy with how's and why's. Look at the facts, she's gone and as hard that sounds all you can do is pick up the pieces and move on.

I bet you anything she has endless reasons why she's gone and trust me you don't want to be with somebody like that. Take care of yourself for awhile focus on the things you want to achieve. The right person will come into your life and stay. Stop chasing the wrong one so you can find the right one.
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Old 30th September 2017, 6:33 PM   #63
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I just wanna say my heart goes out to you man. I've just experienced an extremely similar situation as you, you can check out my posts to get the full story if you're interested. But the gist is she started getting distant for a few months, and then she drops the "I think we should see other people" bombshell on me. Just like you she told me that if we're meant to be well find our way back to each other, that she still loves me, and that she hopes that she realizes were meant to be together but she wants to explore her options first.

It's absolutely gut wrenching man I know exactly how you feel. The bitter pill that we have to swallow is that this is really common in relationships, especially at this age. The "honeymoon period" ends usually somewhere around the 1.5-2 year mark, and thats where the relationship really gets tested. Some people decide they still want to stay and recognize the relationship is transitioning to a more stable and less exciting stage, while others chase that feeling with someone else, because they feel you're not the "one" anymore. Usually at our age they just decide to leave and chase that feeling, until they can't anymore, and then they finally settle down further down the line.

Either way man don't blame yourself it is 100% her decision, although I know it seems completely unfair. You've done nothing wrong. I know its brutally painful, but know that you're not alone in your pain. Theres lots of us out there suffering with you for the same reason. For now you gotta maintain NC to heal yourself and don't give yourself any hope she'll come back. Don't hang on to her words. Just take this time heal and strengthen yourself. It's okay to mourn.
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Old 30th September 2017, 8:39 PM   #64
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Originally Posted by ExpatInItaly View Post
Women - and men - who move on easily are already long gone emotionally by the time they end the relationship.
I know this i just find it so ****ing wierd how she han want to go back to such a ****ty old flirt who treated her like crap.

Will this last with this guy? I do not want her back out of self respect but u do still love her. I love us and 2hat we used to be.

I mean wtf in 3 years i Will have a degree in economics i currenröy rum 2 companies besides my studies and doing extra work as an economics assistant also working out atleast 3 Times per week.

What the **** does she see in this ****ing dirty drug ex?

Everything with our families and everything just right down the ****ing drain.


I have a ****ing weekend to Venice looked för 4k before we broke up with this girl.

I got ****ing exchanged for this crap? They must have talked during our relationship otherwise it would bot ve this ****ing fast.
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Old 1st October 2017, 7:51 AM   #65
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Evolution sucks

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Originally Posted by Woodburner View Post
How can a woman move on so easily? Just boom gone?

Its evolution my friend. Women are wired to move on quickly, and never look back, because in our evolutionary past men were killed all the time by accidents, animals, or other cavemen.

The woman who would not have sex with a new man due to sentimental feelings for her now dead husband, would not survive to pass on her genes, and so we are all, men and women, descendants of women who gave no f*cks for exes.

This is why women move on quickly, whereas men often hold a flame all the way to the grave.
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Old 1st October 2017, 12:27 PM   #66
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Originally Posted by Fever of love View Post
Its evolution my friend. Women are wired to move on quickly, and never look back, because in our evolutionary past men were killed all the time by accidents, animals, or other cavemen.

The woman who would not have sex with a new man due to sentimental feelings for her now dead husband, would not survive to pass on her genes, and so we are all, men and women, descendants of women who gave no f*cks for exes.

This is why women move on quickly, whereas men often hold a flame all the way to the grave.
I'm sorry, but this is a load of malarkey. Take a look around these boards to see how many heart-broken women are still pining after the men who dumped them or cheated on them, or even abused them. Some men move on quickly, too, never to look back.

It is not a gender issue.
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Old 1st October 2017, 12:30 PM   #67
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Originally Posted by Wobugan View Post
I know this i just find it so ****ing wierd how she han want to go back to such a ****ty old flirt who treated her like crap.

Will this last with this guy? I do not want her back out of self respect but u do still love her. I love us and 2hat we used to be.

I mean wtf in 3 years i Will have a degree in economics i currenröy rum 2 companies besides my studies and doing extra work as an economics assistant also working out atleast 3 Times per week.

What the **** does she see in this ****ing dirty drug ex?

Everything with our families and everything just right down the ****ing drain.


I have a ****ing weekend to Venice looked för 4k before we broke up with this girl.

I got ****ing exchanged for this crap? They must have talked during our relationship otherwise it would bot ve this ****ing fast.
Unfortunately, this is probably true.

It is hurtful and you have a right to feel angry. But it will be important moving forward that you don't give so much power to those feelings that it prevents you from moving on and finding a great girl someday.
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Old 1st October 2017, 8:27 PM   #68
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Took a glimpse of her Instagram today first time in a few weeks so different she is.

Acting like a ****ing child, the i used to know is long ****ing gone and with a ****ing White trash. Ny picture of her is completely ****ing ruined.

How can she not Think what she did is ****ed up?

Anyways they have probsvlt been seeing eachother now since may and so far no public affection posted by them two nothing on fb or Instagram (deleted her of fb as well) is it failing? I hope to ****ing god this goes to hell for her.

Shall i block her as well?

It sounds horrible but the pain has caused me is un imaginable. I hope she ****ing dies.

She has taken such a big **** on our RS i find no ****ing words.

I just thought she was different i loved her but now i just feel this ****ing hate every****ing day i want my life back.

Last edited by Wobugan; 1st October 2017 at 8:48 PM..
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Old 2nd October 2017, 1:18 AM   #69
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I blocked her from everything its du ****ing awful that i Will never be able to be friends with her after all we had.

She just pissed everything away, everything with family all laughs all kind things Every happy moment just completely down in drains.

This Will be my last post in this thread.

I am moving on with my life, she Will be forgotten. She is not worth it.

How can she realize what we had was special as i do now?

I hate her i absolutely hate her, Every awake hour for the past 6 months has been draining me of energy because of this ****. I har ****ing enough
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Old 2nd October 2017, 1:46 AM   #70
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Yes, you should block her. You should have done so a long time ago, really.

In kindness, I think you should speak to a counselor. You're not coping well, which is normal, but I fear you are going to surrender to this hate and not come out stronger for it.
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Old 2nd October 2017, 1:53 AM   #71
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Originally Posted by ExpatInItaly View Post
Yes, you should block her. You should have done so a long time ago, really.

In kindness, I think you should speak to a counselor. You're not coping well, which is normal, but I fear you are going to surrender to this hate and not come out stronger for it.
Hi,

When you mean a counselor would like School counsling do? I know i am not coping well its just i never believed it would turn out this way its such a huge shock for me.

Especislly everything here as well with the move here being away from family School etc being owned money by my previous work it is just so many ****ing things.

Last edited by Wobugan; 2nd October 2017 at 1:56 AM..
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Old 2nd October 2017, 2:08 AM   #72
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Originally Posted by Wobugan View Post
Hi,

When you mean a counselor would like School counsling do? I know i am not coping well its just i never believed it would turn out this way its such a huge shock for me.

Especislly everything here as well with the move here being away from family School etc being owned money by my previous work it is just so many ****ing things.
Yes, that would certainly be a good start. You will likely benefit a lot from being able to speak to someone who can guide you when you feel angry and hurt.
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Old 2nd October 2017, 2:15 AM   #73
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Yes, that would certainly be a good start. You will likely benefit a lot from being able to speak to someone who can guide you when you feel angry and hurt.
Will apply to counselor today have ro get my life straight im än ambitious young funny guy this is not me.

I Will recocdr from this
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Old 6th October 2017, 12:41 PM   #74
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Have gotten medication etc now from the doctor mitazaprin anti depressant.

Guess it all was just to much för me moving to Another city etc School, job ows me money etc.

Was in her city today to exchange train felt so overwhelmed all memories just flashing by it was like i was gonna come Home. Home to her.
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Old 16th October 2017, 6:23 PM   #75
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Red face

Just have to get this off my chest somewhere

over the recent days i have been thinking about her a lot, thinking about what we used to have and how it will be so hard to find that again somewhere else.

I just hate how we ended things, absolutely hate how we just fell apart when everything could might be resolved if we just communicated with eachother.

Breaks my heart knowing that she is or was with this ****ing junkee who will never be able to give her what i gave her, a loser.

We had two loving families, our families were so close and we had it very good financially wise for our age a lot of fine things heading in our way.

What could have been if we just talked to eachother i will never know, what could have been if i just had ****ing better grades and could get into UNI into her city the same year she did.

The last 2 weeks have been ****ing hell, just have this thought that she will call me one day saying she made the biggest mistake of her life but i know she won´t, my guess she is happy.

When i was on the train this week and i took a exchange train in her city it felt like i was gonna meet up her at the train station as usual.

Somedays i feel like its the first week of our breakup...

Each day i try to improve myself, i study hard as **** i work out 4-5 days per week and take a 1 hour walk in the evening when i get home from my walk i am exhausted but i cannot sleep.

I have gotten a very good job on the side of my studies, assistant to management consultants which is what i aspire to be and will be one day.

Never in my life have i worked as hard as i do now but still i cannot escape the thoughts of her, to have everything as it used to be i would kill for. But i know it would never be the same even if we got back together.

Everything is ruined, 20% of my life deleted and blocked i could never feel the same if we were to get back together, and knowing that simply sucks.

Sorry for the rant but just had to write somewhere..

BR
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