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Confusedlonelyman's Journal

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I'm the OM and Confused..... Help Me



Not sure where to start this, it's long and somewhat complicated. But I was sent to prison and I broke up with my fiance'. She wanted to stay together but i was mentally incapable and thought i was doing the best thing for her. She met someone and now lives with him, they've been together for 2 years or a little more. Since 2012 they have been living together.


Now I just returned home from my bid from 2010 and contacted her to say hello. She came to see me and told me how much she missed me and still she is "In-Love" with me. I tried to persuade her that i have nothing and she seems to be building a life with him. But she claimed she is not really happy and only loves him, but hasn't moved on from me. I was questioning was she still there out of obligation or to have a roof over her kids head.


We had been spending long nights on the phone cause he is not around and will not be back for 6 months. She said it would give us time to see where we are with each other. I didn't know how much I still was "In Love" with her, but once I realized it, I was ready.


After awhile, she said she was getting really confused and needed time to understand everything. She wants school to end for the semester and then really get back to things. I am trying to give it time, but seems that the calls have diminished and contact is only from me initiating. I agreed to give space but how much space is too much?


Anyone have been through this thing? Both Men and Women, I need your perspectives, especially if you've been through this....


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Did you two keep in touch while you were in prison? Were you aware that she was with someone else or is this a shocking surprise (thinking she'd maybe wait for you?) that she moved on.


I agree with RF, work on you, build your life back up, and if it's meant to be, when the timing is right (for both of you) you two will find your way back to one another, but NOT on the expense of her boyfriend/partner by cheating on him.


She needs to think, have space and figure out what she wants and what is best for her kids. Those kids have had this guy around for a while so this isn't easy for her to just up and dump him, then start a new life with you.

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I want to hang in there to see if we have a chance, that is what i want to do. I have since been doing pretty good without over stepping the boundaries. I'm still waiting on her and giving the time needed

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My advice, you should work on getting your life back on track with as little drama as possible. She sounds lost and confused, and borderline uses men. I feel bad for the guy she's with, to be honest.


I'd move on, block her number...and get your own life back on track.

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