DivorcedGirl Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 Please help me out. I am divorced and live with a new BF, but he does not like to be called BF. We have a great, although somewhat unorthodox relationship; my role in the relationship is somewhat submissive. I work in a conservative field and I need to make it clear to co-workers that I am not single and not available for any dating. The problem with calling him a BF (besides him not liking that term) is that then my co-workers will start asking all the silly questions like "is the relationship serious?", "are you looking to get married soon?" and all that nonsense. I thought about calling him "partner", but then people will ask "what kind of partner?". I would really appreciate any suggestions on how to introduce him. Link to post Share on other sites
Krytellan Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 Not trying to be funny, but how about, "Hey guys, this is Bob." Link to post Share on other sites
Krytellan Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 "oh yeah? Who's Bob?" Point to Bob, "He's a friend of mine." Then, if you need to make a pre-emptive strike, turn the conversation to the buffet table before anything else can happen. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 you're not required to introduce him as anything. Just say his name. As in: "Hey, everyone, this is Joe Schmoe" Link to post Share on other sites
IpAncA Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 Please help me out. I am divorced and live with a new BF, but he does not like to be called BF. We have a great, although somewhat unorthodox relationship; my role in the relationship is somewhat submissive. I work in a conservative field and I need to make it clear to co-workers that I am not single and not available for any dating. The problem with calling him a BF (besides him not liking that term) is that then my co-workers will start asking all the silly questions like "is the relationship serious?", "are you looking to get married soon?" and all that nonsense. I thought about calling him "partner", but then people will ask "what kind of partner?". I would really appreciate any suggestions on how to introduce him. Just tell them his name. They will probably figure it out. Especially if they see you with him all the time. If you want them to know your not single then you have to let them know. Of course their going to ask questions silly. Just explain to them that you don't want to talk about your personal life and when your ready to talk about (if you do) then you will. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 I agree with introducing him as 'my friend Joe'. Those who are interested enough in you to date you will observe the sparks between you two and it'll become pretty clear you are 'more than friends'. Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 IMO, this is a perfect example of someone creating drama in their life. Don't tell your co-workers anything. Why do they need to know about your personal life anyways. Why even bring it up. If he doesn't want to be called a BF, then simply don't take him to public areas where he you would have to introduce him that way. I used to do that. Everyone at work used to know my business. I put a stop to that. The last BF I had, (we just broke up) my coworkers didn't even know that I was dating anyone. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 Please help me out. I am divorced and live with a new BF, but he does not like to be called BF. We have a great, although somewhat unorthodox relationship; my role in the relationship is somewhat submissive. I work in a conservative field and I need to make it clear to co-workers that I am not single and not available for any dating. The problem with calling him a BF (besides him not liking that term) is that then my co-workers will start asking all the silly questions like "is the relationship serious?", "are you looking to get married soon?" and all that nonsense. I thought about calling him "partner", but then people will ask "what kind of partner?". I would really appreciate any suggestions on how to introduce him. Just curious on why you refer to him as your BF if he doesn't even want anyone to know, let alone even like being called a BF. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 Just curious on why you refer to him as your BF if he doesn't even want anyone to know, let alone even like being called a BF. I think it's a divorced guy thing. After being a husband it's hard for some to wear the label of boyfriend. Too much commitment. Even if they act the part of BF hearing it freaks them out. This is only MY opinion. May be not true at all. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 I think it's a divorced guy thing. After being a husband it's hard for some to wear the label of boyfriend. Too much commitment. Even if they act the part of BF hearing it freaks them out. This is only MY opinion. May be not true at all. But its not him that is divorced, the OP is the one who is divorced. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 How about " This is Jeff.. The guy I'm banging..." Unless you are married just introduce him with his first name " Hi this is Jeff " If they ask you to elaborate then you can say he is the guy you are banging.. Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 But its not him that is divorced, the OP is the one who is divorced. pardon moi... comprehension was never my strong suit Link to post Share on other sites
My Fair Katie Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 Just curious on why you refer to him as your BF if he doesn't even want anyone to know, let alone even like being called a BF. The gist I got was that he prefers the term "master." Different strokes for different folks. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 pardon moi... comprehension was never my strong suit I already knew that. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 The gist I got was that he prefers the term "master." Different strokes for different folks. No kidding. Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 comprehension was never my strong suit May I please use that sentence as my signature! I will quote you! Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 The gist I got was that he prefers the term "master." perhaps "my lord" and greet him with a curtsy, on...his...FACE Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 May I please use that sentence as my signature! I will quote you! um seriously? sure go ahead if you're serious. no need to quote me though. i don't want people seeing that OVER and OVER, ya know? it's embarrassing... Link to post Share on other sites
My Fair Katie Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 perhaps "my lord" and greet him with a curtsy, on...his...FACE Ow my spleen! I'm gonna go find a face to curtsy on. Or go find lunch. Choices. Link to post Share on other sites
che_jesse Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 And he gave you no indication of what he wants to be introduced as? I'm sure hes had this problem before in his life. Link to post Share on other sites
magichands Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 perhaps "my lord" and greet him with a curtsy, on...his...FACE Ow my spleen! I'm gonna go find a face to curtsy on. Or go find lunch. Choices. My spleen aches for you both. Wicked!!!! Shakespeare used the word "spleen" 30 times in his writings. Link to post Share on other sites
IpAncA Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 The gist I got was that he prefers the term "master." Different strokes for different folks. Lol!! That does sound kind of sexy though. At least some of you don't get introducted as "this is the little lady" or "old lady." Link to post Share on other sites
luvtoto Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 um seriously? sure go ahead if you're serious. no need to quote me though. i don't want people seeing that OVER and OVER, ya know? it's embarrassing... I was joking. But, I can totally relate to that statement!! Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 Why don't you ask him how he wants to be introduced? Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted December 9, 2006 Share Posted December 9, 2006 Why don't you ask him how he wants to be introduced? Now that's sensible advice. NJ has spoken. Glad someone remembered this is an ADVICE forum. Link to post Share on other sites
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