Nobel Posted March 24, 2002 Share Posted March 24, 2002 Like most hypocrites, we only only come around when we need help. So after this question I'm going to do my best to remember what Tony, Velvet, and Ed have told me. Ok, here goes! This week has marked the first year of our relationship, but I don't feel the same about her as I did when we first started going out (the butterflies and head in the clouds). We now are like best friends (we bicker about small things, but always are there for one another). Since last Sunday till now, I have gone from red-hot anger towards her to emotional numbness to frightened. I will stick to my guns and fight through this. But how come I don't feel the way I felt when I first went out with her. It's like I don't like her anymore, I like being with her more. Which is more important. Link to post Share on other sites
velvet Posted March 24, 2002 Share Posted March 24, 2002 There is the difference btw love and lust. When you fall in love with someone, the butterflys and the head in the clouds is only temporary. After those feelings fade, you have to decide if thats the person you would want to have a long term r/s with. Love is bigger than butterflys and being on cloud 9. Love is something that is hard to describe, but you would know it. You said you like being with her. There is a difference btw just being with someone and being in love. Being in love isnt like a party in your pants everyday or having your heart jump out of your chest everytime you look at your other half. Alot of people end relationships after the fireworks fade. Because they like that feeling. But its lust not love. Being in love is having unconditional love for the person your with, and wanting to better your life to help make a good life for your other half. This should 50/50. It caring, loving, after the adrenaline from the begining of the r/s subsides. Like most hypocrites, we only only come around when we need help. So after this question I'm going to do my best to remember what Tony, Velvet, and Ed have told me. Ok, here goes! This week has marked the first year of our relationship, but I don't feel the same about her as I did when we first started going out (the butterflies and head in the clouds). We now are like best friends (we bicker about small things, but always are there for one another). Since last Sunday till now, I have gone from red-hot anger towards her to emotional numbness to frightened. I will stick to my guns and fight through this. But how come I don't feel the way I felt when I first went out with her. It's like I don't like her anymore, I like being with her more. Which is more important. Link to post Share on other sites
Nobel Posted March 24, 2002 Share Posted March 24, 2002 From Velvet "Being in love isnt like a party in your pants everyday or having your heart jump out of your chest everytime you look at your other half." My goodness, that is so true, there are times when I do not feel that heart-pounding effect, but then there are times when I do(and it makes me feel good). But when I don't get that feeling I get scared, because I think too much and think I don't want to be with her. I have come to realize that they are just thoughts (eventhough I want them to go away), they don't worry me like they did in 2001 (fall), deep down I have this belief that things will be okay. I never thought a relationship had so many intangibles. There is the difference btw love and lust. When you fall in love with someone, the butterflys and the head in the clouds is only temporary. After those feelings fade, you have to decide if thats the person you would want to have a long term r/s with. Love is bigger than butterflys and being on cloud 9. Love is something that is hard to describe, but you would know it. You said you like being with her. There is a difference btw just being with someone and being in love. Being in love isnt like a party in your pants everyday or having your heart jump out of your chest everytime you look at your other half. Alot of people end relationships after the fireworks fade. Because they like that feeling. But its lust not love. Being in love is having unconditional love for the person your with, and wanting to better your life to help make a good life for your other half. This should 50/50. It caring, loving, after the adrenaline from the begining of the r/s subsides. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 ...sounds like a pretty good idea to me! Link to post Share on other sites
velvet Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Do you have a party in yours everyday Mony? I think that alot of times people loose interest in having sex with their mate. I did. It got to the point where I couldnt have sex with my b/f without feeling raped, becuase the attractions were not there anymore. This slowly built up through a years period. I havent been involved with another r/s long enough to see if this is actually the case with the majority of relationships. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Kind of scary. There's no way of knowing whether you'll get tired or not. EEEEWWWWWWW!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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