The Best of: Winning Someone Back

[scuderia]

she juz couldnt accep it that you were able to have a fun time without bothering about her. Shes angry that u r no longer the sucker she though you were and expected you to be.

 

and this is a good thing. She may be angry with you but thoughts u will be in her mind even though they r angry ones. Girls a c***s . They expect u to cont kissing their ass even if they r the one who screwed things up in the 1st place. DUn give in so fast. Slowly get yr power back. she may have cursed you in her myspace or watever. It juz makes her look like a loser as shes still living in the past. You juz act like u nvr read it or that u've read it and it dosent matter to u. Indifference is the way u get the power back Soon she will be kissing yr ass

 

and even if she dosent come back in the end. atleast u got yr power n pride back and she will be the loser in the end.

[theadventure50120]

she juz couldnt accep it that you were able to have a fun time without bothering about her. Shes angry that u r no longer the sucker she though you were and expected you to be.

 

and this is a good thing. She may be angry with you but thoughts u will be in her mind even though they r angry ones. Girls a c***s . They expect u to cont kissing their ass even if they r the one who screwed things up in the 1st place. DUn give in so fast. Slowly get yr power back. she may have cursed you in her myspace or watever. It juz makes her look like a loser as shes still living in the past. You juz act like u nvr read it or that u've read it and it dosent matter to u. Indifference is the way u get the power back Soon she will be kissing yr ass

 

and even if she dosent come back in the end. atleast u got yr power n pride back and she will be the loser in the end.

 

Thanks man I'm in a wierd mood today , i'm laughing all the time because i expected to see her mum out , but to top it off i saw my ex , perfect!

 

Yeah i know i'll be in her mind now , and she knows i was having fun without her and i wasn't kissing her ass , oh yeah i was drunk when doing this haha and still managed to remeber the 1st page

[theadventure50120]

Whir , any input on what happened last night? Do you agree with the guy above?

[whir]

yah scuderia has good precise point...

[theadventure50120]

If i knew it was her at first i probably would have spoke to her and been sucked in as i was kinda drunk.

 

Walking away and not saying anything...what does that show? that she is going to have to try harder then that to get my attention? and i'm a changed person?

 

Do you think that was the best thing i could have done , which was to walk away? If i talked to her would it have been good?

 

I think her mum told her where i was since i spoke to her , she was suppose to be out at a concert (i didn't ask her mum this , infact i asked about everyone apart from my ex) then somehow came to the club i was at. But i'm not sure.

 

Do you think i'm now in a better postion now , since i seen her for the first time in a month and didn't look like i was interested? and she was the one doing all the looking at me , i got told off someone , i wasn't actually looking at her.

 

That took alot out of me to just ignore her. But do you think it could have made things better?

[theadventure50120]

By ignoring someone i could have pushed her away even further...she wanted to talk to me for some reason and i choose not to for some reason , i'm on a downer at the minute , i'm thinking to much into this then i was earlier.

 

I checked her profile aswell before , she talks about this guy on her profile blah blah blah , then sends him a comment saying "i <3 you" , hmm ok. I don't care about that now , he doesn't live no where near us anyway. But she seems to have an obession over him , like she did with me.

 

What i'm more bothered about is i don't know if i could have pushed her away further as i been thinking about it. I ignored her to show her i changed and that i was having a good time without her , don't know if that message got across.

 

The problem with me is , i read to much into things..i wake up in the morning happy , i'm thinking new thoughts then the more i think through the day the more negative i get. How do i stop this?

 

because at the start of the day i was happy , i had seen her and she didn't bother me. I get the comment i'm still happy , she didn't like what i did. Now she sent that comment to the guy for whatever reason (could be to make her feel better i don't know) , maybe she was sad that night , again i don't know. See my problem , i think to much =/

 

I just need clarification that i did do the right thing? Or blew my chances.

[Ruff Ryder]

Your doing great my young friend. Everything seems to be looking up for you with this girl...

 

Everything you did on friday is what needed to be done even if it was by mistake. Good man and great work...

 

Hope your well...

 

Peace.

[whir]

dude honestly this guy deserves a medal of honor:)

[Ruff Ryder]

Or mabe his personal consulatant and coach does??????

[theadventure50120]

lol stop making me laugh lol , she viewed my profile last night...still haven't responded to her comment on that site.

 

I know i got my respect back , and probably put her in her place and made a fool of her.

 

Yeah Ruff is helping me alot , but (it was Saturday night btw) was all my doing , i forgot everything i was told to do (probably because i wasn't ready/planned for that to happen) it was near the end of the night also , i was going home soon , and that was just basic reactions to walk away.

 

But yeah phrase Ruff to

[whir]

Or mabe his personal consulatant and coach does??????

lolz:laugh: ...well we still have to cross our fingers...hope he wont fail us...lolz

[theadventure50120]

lolz:laugh: ...well we still have to cross our fingers...hope he wont fail us...lolz

 

I'm not going to fail I know what to do , just don't know how to approach the situation to get there in first place. But with her seeing me just helped me in so many ways , i didn't plan that. She did me a favour , she screwed up , she lost her respect and confidence in the space of 5secs lol and turned it around.

 

I just have trouble of getting there etc meeting up , saying what i need to say if she goes off in her bitchy moods because i would have usually sucked up to her , but with help from Ruff i am starting to reply in a cocky / funny attitude so she knows she isn't getting to me.

[PoshPrincess]

I'm not going to fail I know what to do , just don't know how to approach the situation to get there in first place. But with her seeing me just helped me in so many ways , i didn't plan that. She did me a favour , she screwed up , she lost her respect and confidence in the space of 5secs lol and turned it around.

 

I just have trouble of getting there etc meeting up , saying what i need to say if she goes off in her bitchy moods because i would have usually sucked up to her , but with help from Ruff i am starting to reply in a cocky / funny attitude so she knows she isn't getting to me.

 

Well done! Have only just started following this thread but I hope I can be as strong as you. I am desperate to get back with my ex who I know still loves me, but it's complicated, etc etc. We have been NC for three weeks now, well, he has tried contacting me a couple of times but I have had enough willpower not to pick up the phone. Thank God for caller ID, eh?

 

TheKhris, Ruff Ryder, Whir, keep up the good work.........! You're giving some of us lost souls a bit of hope. And even if it doesn't work, at least we can walk away with some self-respect.

[Ruff Ryder]

Hey posh, Its all good.

 

Read the tead and when you done start again and read it again. Its good stuff and it will help in your mission.

 

Theadventura at this point I DONT THINK HE KNOWS HOW TO FAIL he is doing a damn good ob thus far. Again well done mate.

 

Posh -You want your ex back? hmmmmm get yourself back first and the rest falls into place.

 

Big up all and WHIR legend mate

[PoshPrincess]

Hey posh, Its all good.

 

Read the tead and when you done start again and read it again. Its good stuff and it will help in your mission.

 

Theadventura at this point I DONT THINK HE KNOWS HOW TO FAIL he is doing a damn good ob thus far. Again well done mate.

 

Posh -You want your ex back? hmmmmm get yourself back first and the rest falls into place.

 

Big up all and WHIR legend mate

 

Thanks Ruff Ryder, I feel I am definitely getting there - at last. Even if I don't get him back at least I know now that there IS life without him. Would rather it be WITH him but, hey, life goes on and all that. I KEEP reading the beginning of the thread - it keeps my spirits up no end. Cheers!

[theadventure50120]

Hey posh, Its all good.

 

Theadventura at this point I DONT THINK HE KNOWS HOW TO FAIL he is doing a damn good ob thus far. Again well done mate.

 

Thanks again Ruff , ahh the pain of listening to music espicelly when it's music when everything was so perfect.

[theadventure50120]

I just texted me ex in reply to the "paul , your a C*** , hope you happy with yourself" which was 2days ago..

 

I said.. "So C.*.*.* , is that a C U next tuesday? where and when?"

 

she always said see you next tuesday instead of that word , i'll probbaly get a reply soon , dunno what it will say , probably some angry comment.

 

i'm sitting here trying to guess what she is going to say and how i'm going to reply being funny about it.

[theadventure50120]

help me! She said this...i don't know how to reply to it.

 

What meet up with you?

ha i think not.

You wouldnt even give me the time of day on friday.

[theadventure50120]

All that respect i had has now been wiped , she doesn't know that...i can't reply yet because i don't know what to say. I just feel like **** again , i knew 100% she wasn't going to say yes because of what i did and that would make her look like a mug , so i knew she was going to say that and get some pride back in herself.

 

I need advice on what to say in the reply , i need that meet up. I just keep thinking if i had talked to her i would have getting to meet up.

 

But you guys say walking away was good , i dunno at the minute

[theadventure50120]

I can't sleep , to much thinking going on.

 

I keep thinking , that was her attempt to put me down , in other words if she didn't care she wouldn't have replied , it took her 2mins to reply after logging in. Her way of getting respect back , it wasn't even an invite , it was more of a joke out of what she called me really.

 

I hope i didn't give back her pride. She probably feels good at the minute i dunno , so if i reply with something funny again back which she won't be expecting.

 

Yeah walking away showed her i didn't need her , but what if really i did push her father away Ruff? because she attempted to talk to me , so why is she going to meet me when i brushed her off?

 

Now Ruff how am i going to crack her? She is just going to continue this..

 

I really felt like saying "huh? friday? who were you speaking to on friday because it certainly wasn't me" , i was out saturday , but i felt that would be mocking her mistakes.

[inde4544]

Dude do what you have to do to just walk away and do not respond. I went through all this and it literally did nothing but hurt myself. I have been no contact for a week now and I feel so much better. She callued you a c**t that is just low. Take the high road and do it for yourself. If she comes around eventually you can decide then if you want her back and I bet you wouldnt; I got out of a relationship w/ a girl I thought I was going to marry. I wish I would have found this board sooner I would have walked away then. Believe me you have to do whats best for you and talking to her is not going to help.

[Angela21]

I'm sorry but this is all bs and stupid games to me...no offense!. There is no one sure strategy to get over an ex, it's emotions and feelings not mathematical equations for crying out loud. You are dealing with people, complex human beings and you want to turn it into a science experiment.

 

Look if you want to pour your heart out to your ex, do it, if you want to beg and plead and try to repair what was broken, do it. Just go with your heart. If you don't succeed, it won't be for lack of trying. If you want the relationship to work and you've changed your ways or you want to try and change your ways, then tell your ex that. And even if all your promises doesn't change his/her mind, at least you tried and you put it out there. I'm not saying you should turn into a crazy stalker. But if you have a love that you think is worth something, fight for it.

 

We all (including the oh so desired EX)fall in love and we get our hearts stumped on, it's life. You go through the pain, you do what you can to make the pain go away and then you move on from it. If my ex wants to stand on his pedestal and call me desperate or clingy or a wuss just because I happen to be in love with him and I want him in my life, then let him do that, I'm only human and I do what I can. And you know what? so is he, and one day he will have to beg and grovel over a woman, and then he will know what it really feels like.

 

I'm sick and tired of hiding my pain and putting on stupid, fake, brave face, putting on a stupid act, acting indifferent when I'm suffering. Enough already!!!! I am a human being and dammit! I hurt, and I am not ashamed of that. I am not ashamed that I'm not perfect and I don't always say the right things or do the right things. I would like to see anyone who's never gone through a broken heart tell me that I'm weak or I'm a wuss just because I sent a long "please take me back" email.

 

Just be yourself and don't be afraid to love and be scared to actually admit that you love someone. sheesh!!.

 

Real love is not a power struggle, it's not a stupid game about who has control or the upper hand. And believe it or not, its' not about a stupid chase either. I want easy love, love that gives me peace, love that I don't have to walk on eggshells to keep. Oy!

 

 

I totally agree with you! I have followed my heart so many times and made a fool of myself..but you know what I don't care! It shows that I am human and that I had feelings..unlike my ex...I refer to him as the Tin Man on Wizard of Oz....has no feelins...sadly to say...but I can't wait till the day hits that someone hurts him just as bad as he has hurt me over the past 3yrs of my life...three golden years where I could have been doing something else. But yeah I have to say I 've learned a lot from him and I am still waiting the day to be over him..its been almost 2mths without seeing him and among other things if you get my drift...of it wasn't for him to be traveling for his job...I would still be acting like we were together even though it was just plain sex...and whats worse is that when he comes back..I only live 1.5 miles away. LADIES....forget about the bad ones....just think of the day when hes hurting and you bump into him somewhere with your new b/f

[scuderia]

well well well... theadventure... where do i start?

 

u farked up big time dude. big big time....

 

wat happened to the indifference? i told u act like u nvr saw the myspace msg or be indifferent about it. But noooo... u had to go n sms to her making a joke about it

 

wat happened to letting her chase u? nooo... apparently u r the one still doing all the work. U act indifferent at the party, u gotta mantain that image all the way. What you did by msging her was to prove to her that yr indifference during the party was juz an act.

 

U r busted now dude... you can try being indifferent again. but now she knows that wat u do just to piss her off. and she also knows that sooner or later u r gonna be smsing her.

 

I think the problem here is u r expected instant results, hoping to see results within a couple of days. it dosent work this way. it took me 3 mths of no contact juz to get the slut to sms me back on her own.

 

wat u need to do is forget abt yr ex. be indifferent n carry on wif yr life. you should have the if she comes back good. if she dosent, im fine anyway attitude. then she will sense the difference. but now she knows u still haven moved on and its juz an act

 

This is wat happeens for no followin the rules at the start of the thread. NC means NC. she initiates the contact not U. Now u have to start all over from scracth brudder. tough luck, but then again. who dosent make mistakes

[thekhris]

scuderia is right... What happend to the " I can still have a normal life without you..Hey no hard feelings but Im still ok without you"...

 

STOP MAKING AN EFFORT..

 

everyting is going to be fine... When you have a wound and want to heal it then leave it alone..keep touching it will get it infeceted...

 

She has to do all the work this time man..she is the one who must have those sleepless nights thinkin about you.. Man Im warning you Girls have state of the art radars on their minds..they can feel if your just B.S in being no hard feelings and have the ability to have normal life without her...

 

She is stinging you....

 

Dont meet up or anything...

Answer her call occasionally not oftenly and when you do be polite but be the first one to cut it....

 

Be busy be busy and make her see it

[Moai]

Hey theadventure...

 

Dude, you need to bail fast. I know that is easier said than done, but what do you hope to get out of this relationship? Once you are actully with this girl you are going to be second-guessing yourself all the time. It doesn't sound like it will be any fun AT ALL.

 

I agree with what IslandGirl said a few posts back: the relationship thing should be thought of as a dance. You are in full-blown wig-out mode.

 

The only way you will get this chick back is to forget about her totally. Don't check her myspace, don't see her friends, don't answer her calls EVER. It'll go good for a while, then it'll be strange and blah blah blah. You are in the type of situation where she'll come back once you are truly over her and have moved on--and then you won't care.

 

Now, if you enjoy being miserable and obsessing over her behavior and little comments than by all means keep it up. No harm in that, if that is what you are into. FOr me, it sounds like there is way too much to figure out to make the relationship remotely worth it.