starlight2025 Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 There are only 3 types of guys in this world. Nice guys, balanced guys, & jerks. Some differences between the three are: A. Nice guys call their girlfriends everyday sometimes 2 or more times per day. Nice guys sit by the phone all day long waiting for her to call and they'll pick up on the first ring. If they miss a call they are too quick to reply. Balanced guys call their girlfriends no more than once or twice a week unless it's for a specific reason such as to confirm dating plans and those kind of calls are short and sweet. Balanced guys also wait 1-2 days before returning a phone call or replying to an e-mail. They do not always answer their girlfriend's calls & when they do answer they wait 4-5 rings before pikcing up the phone. Balanced guys almost always end the conversation first over the phone & hang up first. (If your girlfriend has recently been in a crisis situation, i.e., in the hospital, grieveing a death in the family,sick,etc... then balanced guys call everyday maybe even twice a day to check in & make sure everything's alright.) Jerk guys will almost never call their girlfriends. They will ignore most of her calls or e-mails too. They will not call very often to check up on her when she's going through a crisis. B. Nice guys are quick to apologize even when they have not done anything wrong Balanced guys apologize when they know they are wrong. They will admit their mistakes. Jerk guys rarely apologize when they are wrong. They never admit their wrongs. They always have to have the last word in an argument. C. Nice guys are afraid to have sex with their girlfriends. Balanced guys save sex with their girlfriends only for special occassions. Jerks just demand sex. D. Nice guys are forgiving but they do not draw boundaries. Balanced guys are forgiving but they also draw boundaries. Jerk guys are unforgiving. E. Nice guys give 2 or more chances when they have been wronged. Balanced guys give 1 chance only. Jerk guys give 0 chances. F. Nice guys will take years before they are bold enough to take the next step to exclusivity in a relationship. They may be friends with a girl for a long time and never make a move beyond that. Balanced guys establish friendship first for at least 1-2 months before dating exclusively as boyfriend/girlfriend. Jerk guys won't even try to establish a friendship first. G. Nice guys say "I love you" too many times per day. Balanced guys say "I love you" about once or twice a day. Jerk guys might say "I love you" but they are not sincere. H. Balanced guys open doors for women but may forget to do so once or twice a year. Jerk guys rarely open doors for women. I. Nice guys are not concerned with their physical appearance or personal hygeine. Balanced guys take good care of their apperance & hygeine. They shower 2-3 times per day. Brush & floss 2 times a day. Trim their fingernails & toenails about once a week. They are clean cut. Jerk guys are obsessed with trying to look like arnold schawzeneager. They may spend 8 hours a day 7 days a week at the gym. They can't go more than 30 minutes without looking at themselves in the mirror. J. Nice guys show up at their girlfriend's house everyday. Balanced guys show up about once a week & no more than that. If there is a crisis situation then these rules are bended. A balanced guy will be there for his girlfriend as much as he can when she has a legitimate need for him. Jerk guys are too obsessed with themselves to make time for their girlfriends. They may be workaholics=married to their work and make no time to see their girlfriends. K. Nice guys are doormats & allow their girlfriends to use their sexual power to get what they want from him. Balanced guys are not afraid to stand up & say "no" in a civil tone and risk losing their sexual privileges that evening. Jerk guys will use profanity and tell their girlfriends to shut up. What is my point? Well the bottom line is this: Nice guys finish last. Jerk guys finish 2nd to last. Balanced guys finish first. How do you know which category you are in? Whichever category you have the most characteristics in. You might be a nice guy in one department while being a jerk in another department while being a balanced guy in another department. I'm a nice guy when it comes to being a doormat in order to keep my sexual privileges. I'm a jerk when it comes to forgiving my girlfriend for wrongs she's done (although I don't tell her that). I'm balanced when it comes to how often I initiate contact with her. I'm balanced when it comes to establishing a friendship with a woman first before taking it to exclusivity. I am a jerk when it comes to giving chances.
MadDog Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 C. Nice guys are afraid to have sex with their girlfriends. Balanced guys save sex with their girlfriends only for special occassions. Jerks just demand sex. If what you say is true, I have no desire to be a balanced guy (unless by special occasions, you mean it's the morning, a nooner, after work, etc.) I guess I have no choice but to be an ass cause the nice guy sounds like a tool.
Art_Critic Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 I'm not sure what kind of life experiences you have had but there isn't much in this guide that I can agree on.. I have always thought a balanced guy is one that knows when to be a nice guy and when to be a jerk and how much of each to be depends on the situation..
Author starlight2025 Posted April 7, 2006 Author Posted April 7, 2006 If what you say is true, I have no desire to be a balanced guy (unless by special occasions, you mean it's the morning, a nooner, after work, etc.) I guess I have no choice but to be an ass cause the nice guy sounds like a tool. Special occassions mean holidays like easter, christmas, thanksgiving, valentine's day, 4th of july , anniversaries, when you get a promotion or when your girlfriend gets a promotion in her job, & going away vacation trips!
blind_otter Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Special occassions mean holidays like easter, christmas, thanksgiving, valentine's day, 4th of july , anniversaries, when you get a promotion or when your girlfriend gets a promotion in her job, & going away vacation trips! So balanced guys aren't allowed to have sex every day? I would never in a million bajillion years date a guy who only wanted sex on special occassions.
a4a Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 I thought a balanced guy was one that did not have to pretend to be something they are not. Who gives a rips ass if you answer the phone on the first or fifth ring. To actually plan that is not a balanced guy. A balanced guy would just answer the phone.
SmoochieFace Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Who gives a rips ass if you answer the phone on the first or fifth ring. Women who follow that dumb "Rules" book.
MadDog Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Special occassions mean holidays like easter, christmas, thanksgiving, valentine's day, 4th of july , anniversaries, when you get a promotion or when your girlfriend gets a promotion in her job, & going away vacation trips! Sounds like more of a tool than the nice guy. At least the nice guy can bone everyday, he's just scared when he does. The balanced guy has sex once a month? I like how you inluded the 4th of July though. There's nothing more patriotic than than boning. God Bless America!
Art_Critic Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 million bajillion Isn't that like a gazillion or a zillion ?.. I'm just wondering
blind_otter Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Sounds like more of a tool than the nice guy. At least the nice guy can bone everyday, he's just scared when he does. The balanced guy has sex once a month? I like how you inluded the 4th of July though. There's nothing more patriotic than than boning. God Bless America! Does this mean he startles easily whilst f***ing? Like "OH! What was that noise?" kind of thing?
blind_otter Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Isn't that like a gazillion or a zillion ?.. I'm just wondering a billion X a gazillion + zillion = bajillion. Come on Art, I thought you were good at pretend math.
a4a Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Sounds like more of a tool than the nice guy. At least the nice guy can bone everyday, he's just scared when he does. The balanced guy has sex once a month? I like how you inluded the 4th of July though. There's nothing more patriotic than than boning. God Bless America! once a month...... hell does that include months with multiple holidays? Does he get laid on Presidents day? Do other holidays count like Boxing Day, or other religious holidays even though he may not be a follower of that religion? Day light savings time should count too!
MadDog Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 once a month...... hell does that include months with multiple holidays? Does he get laid on Presidents day? Do other holidays count like Boxing Day, or other religious holidays even though he may not be a follower of that religion? Day light savings time should count too! Probably any day banks are closed. Man, the amount of porn a "balanced guy" must download getting that little sex. His house is probably one big hard drive.
Author starlight2025 Posted April 7, 2006 Author Posted April 7, 2006 I thought a balanced guy was one that did not have to pretend to be something they are not. Who gives a rips ass if you answer the phone on the first or fifth ring. To actually plan that is not a balanced guy. A balanced guy would just answer the phone. A nice guy who answers on the first ring will give the impression to his girlfriend that he's waiting at her every beck & call and doesn't have a life of his own. There's no mystery in that. No challenge. She may think he's obsessed. No woman respects a man who kisses her butt!
Author starlight2025 Posted April 7, 2006 Author Posted April 7, 2006 Probably any day banks are closed. Man, the amount of porn a "balanced guy" must download getting that little sex. His house is probably one big hard drive. Balanced guys masturbate in the meantime to release their sexual tension while they wait for the next special occassion.
a4a Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 A nice guy who answers on the first ring will give the impression to his girlfriend that he's waiting at her every beck & call and doesn't have a life of his own. There's no mystery in that. No challenge. She may think he's obsessed. No woman respects a man who kisses her butt! Of course not women want a man that pretends he doesn't want anything to do with her. That is such a turn on Any person who has to plan how many rings to answer a phone....... well.... that just pops the word LOSER...... all over them.
Art_Critic Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 A nice guy who answers on the first ring will give the impression to his girlfriend that he's waiting at her every beck & call and doesn't have a life of his own. There's no mystery in that. No challenge. She may think he's obsessed. No woman respects a man who kisses her butt! No she won't.. I answer my phone on the first ring if I can... it is part of having good manners.. Even my desk phone I answer as quickly as I can.. That doesn't mean I'm a nice guy.. It just means I answered on the first ring.. Your idea is utter nonsense or childish.. Maybe a 12 year old would do that
MadDog Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 A nice guy who answers on the first ring will give the impression to his girlfriend that he's waiting at her every beck & call and doesn't have a life of his own. There's no mystery in that. No challenge. She may think he's obsessed. No woman respects a man who kisses her butt! You can answer the phone on whatever ring you want. You just have to lay down the law if she starts giving you s*** like, "Who was that girl?", "Are you hanging out with your friends again? That's twice this month!", "I need my insulin!" etc. If you can't come up with a witty comeback like I normally can, you can always just say, "You're not the boss of me bitch!" and go about your business. That probably falls under the balanced guy category.
SmoochieFace Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 You can answer the phone on whatever ring you want. You just have to lay down the law if she starts giving you s*** like, "Who was that girl?", "Are you hanging out with your friends again? That's twice this month!", "I need my insulin!" etc. If you can't come up with a witty comeback like I normally can, you can always just say, "You're not the boss of me bitch!" and go about your business. That probably falls under the balanced guy category. There wouldn't be any need for any *comebacks*... I would just drop her sorry ass. I wouldn't continue a relationship with a woman like that who has to question every litle thing. THAT is being *balanced*.
MadDog Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Balanced guys masturbate in the meantime to release their sexual tension while they wait for the next special occassion. You should rename this thread to, "Starlight's guide to being the ultimate tool."
Author starlight2025 Posted April 7, 2006 Author Posted April 7, 2006 You can answer the phone on whatever ring you want. You just have to lay down the law if she starts giving you s*** like, "Who was that girl?", "Are you hanging out with your friends again? That's twice this month!", "I need my insulin!" etc. If you can't come up with a witty comeback like I normally can, you can always just say, "You're not the boss of me bitch!" and go about your business. That probably falls under the balanced guy category. Any form of name calling falls under the jerk category. Whatever you do you gotta always play it cool when she upsets you in some way.It's alright to get irritated as long as she doesn't see it in your eyes or hear it in your voice. Just play it cool. I would give her the silent treatment for a little while if her questions started to upset me. Besides why would you get rude with her unless you had something to hide? By the way if you take the silent treatment approach don't ever tell her about your intentions not to talk to her for a little while.
blind_otter Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Any form of name calling falls under the jerk category. Whatever you do you gotta always play it cool when she upsets you in some way.It's alright to get irritated as long as she doesn't see it in your eyes or hear it in your voice. Just play it cool. I would give her the silent treatment for a little while if her questions started to upset me. Besides why would you get rude with her unless you had something to hide? The silent treatment? What are we in the 4th grade? It's one thing to withdraw until you can communicate calmly, another to just ignore the person and never bring up the subject of irritation again. Can I ask you something? Have you ever been in a longterm relationship?
Author starlight2025 Posted April 7, 2006 Author Posted April 7, 2006 The silent treatment? What are we in the 4th grade? It's one thing to withdraw until you can communicate calmly, another to just ignore the person and never bring up the subject of irritation again. Can I ask you something? Have you ever been in a longterm relationship? Yes. As a matter of fact I'm in my longest long term relationship so far. This is my 4th girlfriend. I've been with my gf for a little over 3 years. Well we broke up for a couple months and have been back together for almost 5 months. This coming Tuesday will make it 5 months. I have been a long time browser on this website but signed up just recently. I did use NC as a tool to get her back.
CaliGuy Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Starlight, did you see my guide that I posted in January? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t80848/
SmoochieFace Posted April 7, 2006 Posted April 7, 2006 Starlight, did you see my guide that I posted in January? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t80848/ Looks like you now have some competition.
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