Does this sound like the type of relationship anyone would want?

[chuppy]

1. Neither of you plan dates together in advance. You may talk about places you COULD go in text, but never settle on anything beforehand, and you only both decide where to go the instant you start the day in his car, and after the end of each activity until the day's end.

2. You both do this, because he always asks her "What do you want to do (now)?" at the start of the day and after the end of everything, and if she asks what HE wants, he says "I don't know" and he asks what SHE wants to do again, and they may loop until she gives the final answer, every single time.

3. When they're actually out, they may do nothing but make small comments about whatever is right in front of them, and he just buys her everything. Sometimes they won't have conversations about anything except the brief exchanges where he asks her what to do next, and they'll be in relative silence while walking and doing stuff for hours.

4. In text, he'll tell her how he thinks about her all the time, wants to make sure she never has to work again so she can do her art and hobbies, and will never leave her, talking about he loves her more than the universe and sees her in his dreams. In real life, he just says "I love you", typically in response to if she seems mildly upset about something.

5. She also just says nothing after she tries to get his attention like when he's on his phone or looking at something when they're out, and he doesn't respond to her after her attempting to prompt him a few times. When he finally does speak by asking about something completely different or just to move on to the next thing, or just quietly starting to walk in a different direction, she goes along with him while saying nothing. Even when she's heard she'll often have to repeat herself 2 or 3 times. And sometimes he'll mishear without clarifying and just be like "Okay" before she has to correct him mid-act.

6. When they're out in a public space and his attention suddenly goes somewhere else like maybe she was suddenly looking at something like he would, then he starts walking away from her while her back is turned to him because she's focused on what's in front of her, then when she turns and notices he's walked away she runs up to him without saying a word, then he ignores her prompting until he's done with an activity he found outside, but she silently waits until his attention is available again.

7. She's always the one introducing new ideas for things to do, when prompted and on her own. Even if it's not a business to patronize, but an app to use, or a type of activity to do together. He almost doesn't suggest anything and would be okay with it if they always did the same things they did before indefinitely.

8. When he asks if she would "like to [x]," as an actual idea of his own for something they can do, the [x] in question is whether she would like to scroll on one of their phones on social media in his car with him, or aimlessly joyride around town. At best, he may suggest a big event or location in text days before it's due to happen, in which they will have the opportunity to do the same goal-less walking around they usually do in public or in stores once they get there without any pre-planned list of activities to do.

9. She can vent to him about her problems, which is almost always in text (when they do voice chat, its just to watch stuff on a screen when they're both at home) both about her current life and about her past, and he'll reassure her that everyone who ever hurt her was wrong, and he'll always be there for her.

10. When he tells her about his current circumstances with work or family, she can sit there and not respond to anything while he talks the whole time, before he eventually asks, "So how about you?" He may talk to her without him ever getting a clear signal she's actually listening, and not even try to quiz her on what he just said, assuming she simply did it.

11. When she shares media she likes, they can usually not talk much during it, he can end up not reacting much at all while consuming it with her, and they can end up never talking about it again after they finish. Sometimes, if its long and she doesn't bring up ever watching it again, they will leave it unfinished.

12. When she shares ideas or thoughts she has with him, he can enthusiastically talk with her about the topics while the conversation still currently exists, and then they can end up never continuing the conversation ever again like it never happened.

13. Sometimes when they are out and they see an activity they COULD do, he asks if they can come back to it later when she tries to request doing it, and sometimes when she agrees, and they end up not doing it at all and he never acknowledges that.

14. He's fine with conversations being self-contained. If she asks "Would it bother you to know I can't remember most of our conversations?" He says "No."

15. When she does spontaneously bring up things she wants to do when THEY are suddenly right in front of her, as a request to do them, he'll often bring up a few issues with doing it which she won't understand, without actually saying things like "we shouldn't do that", like stuff about money or lines that don't really make sense. After her asking a few times and him explaining reasons why it might be complicated that aren't just telling her no, she'll eventually agree to not do it while still not understanding why not.

16. He doesn't ever feel the need to spontaneously ask questions about her, because he's already happy with all that he knows about her, and with learning things the instant she talks about them. If she stopped volunteering information about herself entirely, he probably wouldn't notice or care, and he'd be happy just doing activities he pays for with her forever.

17. When she asks why he likes her, he tells her that she's "nice and pretty" which stays the answer for a while because the question ended there because silence followed it, and when pressed later says that she's been compassionate for him in a way that nobody else has. At one point, after hanging out and talking, he tells her that doing so "feels like talking to an extension of myself."

18. She may sometimes do things like a shirt or skirt lift, or guide his hand to a location on her body, when they're in his car or a private room, but he can just sit there and say and do nothing while his heart beats fast, or smile while saying "I don't know what to do" while being told by her "I don't expect you to." He also never initiates such activities himself, nor is he ever the one who asks if she would like to do certain sexual activities with her in earnest.

19. He may make jokes about doing her in a hotel just because there's on nearby only to backtrack with coy disgust about how dirty hotels can be, and joke about doing her in the butt because of certain national laws making other things impossible, and comment about how she'd look hot in something. But it will always end in silence when she actually asks him about having sex, like "Do you want the first time to be spontaneous or scheduled?" or "Do you want to do it in a hotel, your car, or a friend's house?" and he usually says "I'm not sure" or "I don't know." And there's silence and the topic changes to something else eventually.

20. But even though they may never have had sex over a year of dating, when they finally (non-euphemistically) sleep next to each other, they will have not talked at all about him touching her chest under her clothes skin-to-skin while she's sleeping before he just decides to do it during the moment of him immediately being next to her, without saying anything to her, and they won't say a single meaningful word about it during it or after it happens. She may ask if he liked it after, and he may say he felt bad after the moment she initially brings it up, and apologize because he didn't ask, and she can say "it's okay <3", but he'll still do it again in the same quiet way at the soonest next opportunity to sleep next to her.

[Gebidozo]

The first 18 points are small, insignificant things (besides the potential red flag of lovebombing in text).

The last two points feel like a total dealbreaker. If a man doesn’t try to initiate sex after a year of dating, it feels like he doesn’t even consider it a romantic relationship but more like a kind of friendship, perhaps.

[flitzanu]

so you're the guy or the girl?

[ExpatInItaly]

This sounds like two very socially awkward folks with no romantic experience but no prospects but each other. 

I can't imagine why else this would go on for a year.