chrissychris01 Posted August 5 Posted August 5 So last Saturday my bf was supposed to go to a writing retreat for the day until Sunday. Saturday morning comes, and we message each other for a little. Early evening comes and I ask if he reached the retreat safely, it's 2 hours from his residence. I get no response, so I guess he's driving. I decide to call and he ends my call. I call again, and it rang twice then went straight to voicemail...called again and it went to voicemail. I texted him asking is everything ok and why did he end my call, and I was asking if he made it safely to his retreat. He texted me like 30 mins later saying he was trying to focus and was about to take a shower....he didn't call me back or even tell me that he didn't go to the retreat. The next morning he sent me a vocal message saying was home, but did not even mention that he didnt go to this retreat until I directly texted him. He said he didn't go and instead went to a park and did some writing. Why would that warrant him to end my call? he has never done that before since we've been together. It seems very sketchy. Any thoughts?
flitzanu Posted August 5 Posted August 5 first thoughts are why you didn't wait for him to reply to your text, and then kept calling back to back when he didn't answer. that's strange behavior. why not just wait for him to reply?
Author chrissychris01 Posted August 5 Author Posted August 5 3 minutes ago, flitzanu said: first thoughts are why you didn't wait for him to reply to your text, and then kept calling back to back when he didn't answer. that's strange behavior. why not just wait for him to reply? I honestly thought something happened to him because he told me he was driving upstate (2 hour drive) for a retreat....it was going on 9pm. The retreat was for that day. Hours went by and I heard nothing, so I'm thinking something happened to him on the road. It's odd that he wouldn't communicate with me that he didn't go to the retreat at all that day.
ExpatInItaly Posted August 5 Posted August 5 How has your relationship been up to this point? How often do you see each other?
Author chrissychris01 Posted August 5 Author Posted August 5 33 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: How has your relationship been up to this point? Relationshipadvice forum How often do you see each other? Well, it has been up and down for the past 3 weeks after I discovered that he wrote about me in his book saying he was going to "let me go" , but before that things were good. I would stay over at his place 3-4 days out of the week at his request (I have 2 roommates with little to no space where I live). He has a son who I adore, and he has him during the week except on weekends.
Sanch62 Posted August 5 Posted August 5 2 hours ago, chrissychris01 said: … up and down for the past 3 weeks after I discovered that he wrote about me in his book saying he was going to "let me go" … So you’re deliberately behaving in ways to reinforce that choice? 1
basil67 Posted August 5 Posted August 5 3 hours ago, chrissychris01 said: Well, it has been up and down for the past 3 weeks after I discovered that he wrote about me in his book saying he was going to "let me go" Did you have permission to read his journal?
Gebidozo Posted August 6 Posted August 6 11 hours ago, chrissychris01 said: Well, it has been up and down for the past 3 weeks after I discovered that he wrote about me in his book saying he was going to "let me go" Let you go? As in, break up with you? Knowing that he doesn’t want to be with you, why don’t you break up with him yourself?
ExpatInItaly Posted August 6 Posted August 6 13 hours ago, chrissychris01 said: it has been up and down for the past 3 weeks after I discovered that he wrote about me in his book saying he was going to "let me go" , but before that things were good And did you talk to him about this?
ShyViolet Posted August 8 Posted August 8 On 8/5/2026 at 3:32 PM, chrissychris01 said: Well, it has been up and down for the past 3 weeks after I discovered that he wrote about me in his book saying he was going to "let me go" , If anyone said this about me, I would "let them go" first. Why on earth would you want to keep trying to make a relationship work with someone who doesn't really want to be with you? Or who isn't sure about you? 1
Sanch62 Posted August 8 Posted August 8 43 minutes ago, ShyViolet said: If anyone said this about me, I would "let them go" first. Why on earth would you want to keep trying to make a relationship work with someone who doesn't really want to be with you? Or who isn't sure about you? Exactly. After learning he wanted to "let you go," why would you be surprised that he's behaving consistently with that? You can't nag someone into wanting to be with you. 1
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