Why would someone suddenly ignore a close friend after reconnecting years later?

[Anonymous]

Years ago, a coworker and I became really good friends. We went on a couple of dates, but nothing serious came of it, and we eventually drifted apart. Things were a little awkward at the end, but there was no argument or falling out.

A few years later, I reached out because I genuinely wanted to reconnect as friends. By then, I had no romantic interest, and I believe I made that pretty clear.

At the time, he was going through a very difficult period mentally. We talked a lot, and he opened up to me about some very personal things. I spent months supporting him, and he even told me I had come into his life when he needed it most. It honestly felt like we'd rebuilt a really good friendship.

At one point, he offered to help me learn something he's experienced in and told me he'd message me when he got home. He never did.

Two months went by while he stayed active on social media, posting stories and updates. Eventually, I sent him a simple message:

"You disappeared. How have you been? Everything okay?"

He never replied. It's now been over two weeks.

I'm genuinely confused because this doesn't seem like the person I thought I knew. I understand that friendships sometimes run their course, and I'd rather someone simply tell me they don't want to stay in touch than disappear without a word.

From your perspective, what do you think most likely explains this kind of behavior? Have you ever done something similar yourself, or had it happen to you? I'm wondering if there's something obvious that I might be missing.

[stillafool]

I think he's met a woman he likes and although you said you want friendship he feels you might want more so he's backing away so it won't be awkward.  Just because you're the type who would rather someone tell you that they don't want to communicate with you anymore, many people find that awkward and will just ghost you than go through a confrontation.

[Lecocole]

50 minutes ago, stillafool said:

I think he's met a woman he likes and although you said you want friendship he feels you might want more so he's backing away so it won't be awkward.  Just because you're the type who would rather someone tell you that they don't want to communicate with you anymore, many people find that awkward and will just ghost you than go through a confrontation.

It's kind of funny because I genuinely wasn't looking for anything with him. I've been seeing other guys, and I honestly didn't have any romantic feelings for him. I only got so involved because I've experienced really severe depression myself, and he knew that. When he started talking about suicidal thoughts, it really scared me. I was just worried about him as a friend and wanted to make sure he was okay. I thought I made that pretty clear, but maybe I didn't.