[35f] [37m] Underwhelming proposal but it wasn't really my fiancé's fault - how do I deal with this?

[Anonymous]

 

My fiancé had previously told me he'd been wanting to propose for the last 6 months but wanted us to be in a slightly better place. It's been a pretty tough year, a lot of bickering but we'd finally gotten through it. We've been together 1.5 years.

He'd asked for my dad's blessing a few weeks ago, and got a ring. I wanted it all to be a surprise... which it was. Whilst we live together, I'd gone home to visit my parents for a week but my fiancé told me I'd need to be back by the Thursday (last week). I knew that we were going on holiday in a couple of weeks (mid June) so I actually thought the proposal might happen then.

I ended up being pretty rushed coming back from home, not knowing what to pack - ended up taking the wrong things as the weather forecast was off. We went to a place roughly 5 hours away. The first day the weather was lovely, we did a bit of sightseeing and had a great time. We were staying in a different hotel to the following two nights. I had a feeling he'd propose the following day as he said we'd have a chilled night, then had a lot going on the next day.

Unfortunately we got in to a bit of a squabble just before we were going to go to bed. He left the room for 5 mins just to cool down, when he came back I got annoyed that he felt the need to leave. I cried a fair bit (PMS), and as I was getting out of the bathroom he said 'do you actually want to marry me?'. I told him I wanted nothing more in the world than that, and he said perhaps this was how the proposal was meant to pan out. He got down on one knee in the hotel room, I cried, said yes, and he put the ring on.

In hindsight, if I'd have known I'd be feeling this way right now I would've shut it down and told him we'd go to bed and have a good day the next day. However, it was still a nice moment and we went on to celebrate after. The following day we checked out and went to a far more luxurious and romantic hotel... we had a suite overlooking the lake. The grounds were stunning, and I then became aware that he would've proposed there. There were acres of land and a nice trail that we explored the following day which would've been the perfect spot. He had booked a boat ride and a tasting menu at a phenomenal restaurant so we got to celebrate properly.

The main issue is that the proposal event didn't quite go to plan and it's bugging me. He has told me that, if anything, it should be a lesson that none of that matters that much - me and him matter the most, and that we still had those moments but it wasn't manufactured for a photo. He is happy we got to experience all of that together and he's told me we can go somewhere else when I get my final ring.

I suppose because I'd built it up in my head especially over the last couple of months, and there aren't really any beautiful photos, and I'm embarrassed... it feels like a missed opportunity. He'd put so much thought into the weekend and I wanted a beautiful lasting memory. I can't wait to marry this guy. I just want to know how I can stop feeling so miffed, especially since this will sit with me in future when I hear about other proposal stories... what can I do to get over this?

tl;dr proposal wasn't as romantic/ scenic as hoped, especially considering the wait. My fiancé is fine with it but it's grating on me. Not sure how to deal with this feeling

[Gebidozo]

I can only say that if I knew that my fiancée was miffed because I proposed in a hotel room instead of a trail and even compared my proposal unfavorably with some other proposals, I’d cancel the engagement.

 

[Anonymous]

16 minutes ago, Gebidozo said:

I can only say that if I knew that my fiancée was miffed because I proposed in a hotel room instead of a trail and even compared my proposal unfavorably with some other proposals, I’d cancel the engagement.

 

There was nothing special about the hotel, nothing personal to us. Whereas the views from the hotel trail would've been absolutely stunning and I know it would have been more emotional for both of us. I want to look back on it as a fond memory, not something that happened after an argument