luckyornot Posted May 21 Posted May 21 I've been in a relationship for almost 7 years now, 2 kids later and it's been rocky from the beginning, due to both of our faults. It's not one sided at all. I think we rushed into the relationship. Over the 7 years, there's been rarely any intimacy and lately there's absolutely none at all. No Hugging, kissing, like not even the bare minimum. It's making me very resentful, but I'm staying because of the kids. The relationship is very vanilla and boring, we talked so many times about it and literally nothing changes and we've had the same talks a million times. I dont think it's normal, even with having kids, that you can't have a good relationship. Not sure what to do anymore, is staying for the kids right? Or should I run far away? I mean who is just okay with existing around someone. It's strange.
introverted1 Posted May 22 Posted May 22 Have you explored couples counseling? A good counselor can help you break through unproductive conversations. 1
Sanch62 Posted May 23 Posted May 23 11 hours ago, introverted1 said: Have you explored couples counseling? A good counselor can help you break through unproductive conversations. Yep. People have no trouble hiring a plumber or a tax accountant for their expertise, but when it comes to the most important stuff, such as quality of life, it doesn’t occur to people that there are well trained experts for that. Given that children are involved, I’d want to make every effort to improve my family’s home life and my own mental health before opting to bail. 1
Els Posted May 24 Posted May 24 I agree with the suggestion of MC, but I'm also concerned that "it's been rocky from the start". Why did you marry and have 2 kids with a person with whom you have a rocky relationship? If your relationship has any hope of surviving, MC can help you learn to communicate and work through your problems. And it's certainly worth trying. But you should also be prepared for a potential outcome where you both find out that you're just fundamentally incompatible. Because it's not like you had a fantastic relationship before you got married or had kids - in fact it doesn't sound like your relationship has ever been good. So it's entirely possible that you two were never meant to be.
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