worried I no longer have anything going for me or to talk about with women on dates

[cashny3]

As people probably know from my past posts, I'm in grad school and am in my mid 30s living with parents. However, I feel like I'm largely in this gradschool program because I feel like I don't have any other options and I'm afraid if I don't continue that I'll live with my parents for longer and it will be harder to date women.

At first. I felt good knowing that I was doing something with my life, but. I can't help to feel that I'm just forcing myself for the wrong reasons. My mental health is already bad and this precicament is making it worse. What should I do? I don't want to be romantically lonely until I'm 60...

[ShyViolet]

You're too fixated on dating.  You keep asking questions about dating.  You are in no position to date, honestly.  You need to get your mental health to a better place, find some direction in life, and get healthy.  Dating isn't going to come before that.

[cashny3]

2 minutes ago, ShyViolet said:

You're too fixated on dating.  You keep asking questions about dating.  You are in no position to date, honestly.  You need to get your mental health to a better place, find some direction in life, and get healthy.  Dating isn't going to come before that.

You have a point I just don't know if I'll ever have a direction in life.

[basil67]

Your mental health is priority #1.  When you have this better managed, the rest of your life should start to fall into place

[FredEire]

I think you should start worrying about dates when you're actually going on dates. But to get to that point you have to get yourself moving forward with your life and out there meeting people first.

[cashny3]

50 minutes ago, FredEire said:

I think you should start worrying about dates when you're actually going on dates. But to get to that point you have to get yourself moving forward with your life and out there meeting people first.

True. the thing is I'll be having good conversations with women on dating apps but then I'm afraid to ask them out because of all of this.

[Gebidozo]

You’re putting the carriage in front of the horse.

Don’t think about dating now, think about how to improve your mental health.

First you should everything in your power to become the best version of yourself, or at least a version that is strong and healthy enough to withstand the turmoil of romance. Only then you’ll be in a position to tackle dating.

Don’t be like a soldier who is eager to go to war but has no weapons, no ammunition, and no proper training.

[FredEire]

11 hours ago, cashny3 said:

True. the thing is I'll be having good conversations with women on dating apps but then I'm afraid to ask them out because of all of this.

I dont fully agree that you have to have your life in order to date. You just can't be dating with the expectation that this person will fill your life and fix everything, thats your job.

If you are getting some success on the apps in terms of conversations, just go for it with an open mind and a sense of curiosity. Try and separate your own doubts and reservations about your life from the interaction you have with women you go on dates with.

[Els]

You have been in this grad program for... a really long time, if I recall your past posts. How long until you graduate? Can you get an internship before you do?

[smackie9]

You need to have more happening in your personal life to show any substance.