Friends with Benefits situation feeling upset

[Sony12]

1 hour ago, Joanna3 said:

I understand what you are saying. It should just be fun for me but he is nice, the other day he asked me to go to the shop and lent me his card, we do talk a lot when I'm at his too. He's selling his house and has moved back in with his parents so I don't even know if\when I'm going to be seeing him. I saw him two days ago and he has gone back to his typical reading but not replying my messages.

So basically he's having you get groceries for him?

[Joanna3]

1 minute ago, Sony12 said:

So basically he's having you get groceries for him?

No he said to get some more drink as we didn’t have enough 

[Sony12]

10 minutes ago, Joanna3 said:

No he said to get some more drink as we didn’t have enough 

So in other words he is having you do his shopping for him. Most people usually make sure drinks are already available when they are with a date.

[Joanna3]

2 minutes ago, Sony12 said:

So in other words he is having you do his shopping for him. Most people usually make sure drinks are already available when they are with a date.

I normally bring the drink and I did bring some in his own words he has no money

[Sony12]

3 minutes ago, Joanna3 said:

I normally bring the drink and I did bring some in his own words he has no money

A 40 year old guy with no money. What a catch.

[Joanna3]

6 minutes ago, Sony12 said:

A 40 year old guy with no money. What a catch.

He is selling his own house at the moment but is in a lot of debt x

[flitzanu]

i want to see if i have this straight:

1. he doesn't take you on dates or see you in public

2. he only invites you over because you have sex with him, and also doesn't want to have sex with you unless you bring along another woman

3. he doesn't have any money

4. he sends you on errands to get groceries

5. he ignores your texts during the week

6. he only texts you when he wants you to come have sex with him, and speaks nicely only at that time

 

 

[Joanna3]

22 minutes ago, flitzanu said:

i want to see if i have this straight:

1. he doesn't take you on dates or see you in public

2. he only invites you over because you have sex with him, and also doesn't want to have sex with you unless you bring along another woman

3. he doesn't have any money

4. he sends you on errands to get groceries

5. he ignores your texts during the week

6. he only texts you when he wants you to come have sex with him, and speaks nicely only at that time

 

 

1.  No 😑 we've never been on dates or out in public only to his house

2. Not exactly - we've slept together about 8 times now once with a threesome with his friend,but yes he wants a threesome and always asks if other girls are keen to come with me when we do meet

3. No he doesn't as he's in a lot of debt but that isn't a dealbreaker for me

4. Not exactly but I always being the drink and a couple of times he's asked me to get some more but that's ok

5.Not all the time. I probably do text him too much to be fair

6. Yes I always instigate the contact, and then he'll say come over now or phone me to ask me to come over, but yes I have to text him first 

[Sony12]

18 minutes ago, Joanna3 said:

1.  No 😑 we've never been on dates or out in public only to his house

2. Not exactly - we've slept together about 8 times now once with a threesome with his friend,but yes he wants a threesome and always asks if other girls are keen to come with me when we do meet

3. No he doesn't as he's in a lot of debt but that isn't a dealbreaker for me

4. Not exactly but I always being the drink and a couple of times he's asked me to get some more but that's ok

5.Not all the time. I probably do text him too much to be fair

6. Yes I always instigate the contact, and then he'll say come over now or phone me to ask me to come over, but yes I have to text him first 

If you are going to continue getting together with the guy then that is your choice but you know how people are going to respond to your situation if you choose to continue talking here.

This situation has started to become so absurd I almost hope this is just a story you have created.

Edited 14 hours ago by Sony12

[Joanna3]

3 minutes ago, Sony12 said:

If you are going to continue getting together with the guy then that is your choice but you know how people are going to respond to your situation if you choose to continue talking here.

This situation has started to become so absurd I almost hope this is just a story you have created.

It would be a lot easier if it was Sony but I promise you it isn’t 😞 I know it’s no good for me 

[Joanna3]

25 minutes ago, Joanna3 said:

It would be a lot easier if it was Sony but I promise you it isn’t 😞 I know it’s no good for me 

I think it was about 6 weeks ago that I had the more than friends chat with him, his response was no I don’t want a relationship at this point, when I asked about dating he was like no not really keen you then when I said what about hanging out more having more sex and seeing if anything more answer was keen on that. Then we had the whole talk about it he said I think there might be something more as we get on well and have good sex it’s was so confusing. I guess I’m hoping in the past 6 weeks he’s changed his mind. We always cuddle after sex when I stay over Z 

[Joanna3]

Thanks for all your advice but he’s just text to say he thinks he’s done as he has so much to sort out 😔

[stillafool]

What exactly do you see in this guy and what are you getting out of this?

[Joanna3]

4 minutes ago, stillafool said:

What exactly do you see in this guy and what are you getting out of this?

It doesn’t matter now. He’s just texted to say he thinks he’s done as he has so much to sort out (selling house etc) and said sorry so that’s it now. Over 

Edited 11 hours ago by Joanna3

[Sony12]

This whole thread ended up being really strange. Not sure what to think of it.

Edited 9 hours ago by Sony12

[BaileyB]

4 hours ago, Joanna3 said:

Thanks for all your advice but he’s just text to say he thinks he’s done as he has so much to sort out 😔

Well, if you weren’t willing to end it then it’s really for the best that he did. 
 

[ExpatInItaly]

6 hours ago, Joanna3 said:

he’s just text to say he thinks he’s done as he has so much to sort out 😔

Good. 

You were going to get stuck in a very dysfunctional cycle otherwise.