Joey_K307 Posted January 26 Share Posted January 26 (edited) I [M22] mutually broke up with my boyfriend [M28] three nights ago. I don’t know how to feel about it, it’s like I haven’t even processed it yet and I don’t know how I will. I’ve just been pretending nothing’s wrong or that nothing happened. We always argued, we always broke up and got back together, he always hurt me so I was prepared and somewhat numb to it. I didn’t want to be with him anymore, but I didn’t wanna lose him either. Could just be his friend, but it’s obviously not the same and I’d be hurt seeing him with someone else. Plus he told me he’d drop me once he got a girlfriend as we were breaking up, a girlfriend specifically because he doesn’t want to date men anymore. He blocked me more and more we argued. It was like a nightmare come true. I wanted this year to be the best of my life after struggling so much last year, between him and general life, and I just didn’t see him in it so I knew I had to leave it in the past, but it hurts knowing I can’t talk to him all day, I can’t hang out with him again, I can’t feel his love. I wish I had everything in my life together because I feel like it would’ve nullified a lot of our issues, but he had his own issues too. Time was just not on our side. This whole thing really signifies to me that I’ll never find a partner because I did so much for this guy…he never had money so I always bought him so many things, made sure he had food and stuff, supported his dreams and everything but he clearly never loved me. Just waste of time, money and energy. Speaking of which he owes me money which I probably won’t get back. It’s embarrassing and hurtful, I’d rather just pretend none of it ever happened, but I think about him all day everyday and I don’t know how long it will last. This whole thing just feels like again, bad timing given that we both had too many issues to ignore and have stuff to figure out. Edited January 26 by Joey_K307 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted January 26 Share Posted January 26 I am sorry you're hurting. It appears you had a very unhealthy attachment to this man, so yes, it is going to take time to heal. I would focys on being kind to yourself , and patient with your healing. For what it's worth, timing was not the only thing working against you here. There were many other problems between you two, and it's by far for the best to go your separate ways for good. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted January 26 Share Posted January 26 7 hours ago, Joey_K307 said: I’ll never find a partner Yes you will. The hurt of this will eventually pass and you'll find someone, or they'll find you. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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