Gaeta Posted September 22 Share Posted September 22 (edited) 6 hours ago, Gebidozo said: Not in a house that one of the partners actually bought, no. I thought if the OP asked his GF to move in with him in a house that actually belongs to him, There are countries and cultures where couples will never marry but will buy a house and have kids and spend the rest of their lives together. If couples buy a house together it's usually because they are serious about each other whether they marry or not. We are 4 siblings in my family, l'm the only one that ever married. My 3 brothers all have unmarried partners of 20 + years together with houses and kids. If someone owns their own house and invite a gf/bf to live in with them then they could be serious or not. In most cases moving in with someone is a sign of commitment but we see it all the time in LS people moving in together after dating 2 months, of course it's not working but just to say moving in together can mean not that much for some people. Edited September 22 by Gaeta Link to post Share on other sites
Gebidozo Posted September 22 Share Posted September 22 40 minutes ago, Gaeta said: If couples buy a house together it's usually because they are serious about each other whether they marry or not. Yes, that’s exactly what I meant. If the OP asked his GF to move with him into a house he bought, it means they have been together for a while, are extremely serious and planning to spend their lives with each other. But then, how could there be such coarse financial misunderstandings between them? He asks her to pay rent, she refuses… The whole vibe of this is somehow wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted September 22 Share Posted September 22 15 minutes ago, Gebidozo said: Yes, that’s exactly what I meant. If the OP asked his GF to move with him into a house he bought, it means they have been together for a while, are extremely serious and planning to spend their lives with each other. But then, how could there be such coarse financial misunderstandings between them? He asks her to pay rent, she refuses… The whole vibe of this is somehow wrong. No no. Here is the difference He bought the apartment *by himself* and then invite her to move in = possibly he's not serious about her because her being his tenant is not a relationship commitment toward her, it's a business deal. Buying a house together = usually a big relationship commitment (marriage or not). I feel the vibe is wrong as well. In his story I just read concerns for himself. He did not speak about having future plans together, about loving her, about coming up with a plan that would would be fair for both. All he spoke about was he wanted fair market value from her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Leihla_B Posted September 22 Share Posted September 22 7 hours ago, Gebidozo said: I thought if the OP asked his GF to move in with him in a house that actually belongs to him, it is an equivalent of engagement or marriage. Whoa! That's a whole lot of assumption! Plenty of people buy homes and take on roommates. But even in cases of serious partners, some degree of rent is standard, even in an equivalent, like paying the utility bills and groceries, or whatever. That's why 'an agreement' is necessary up front. It's also why location matters. In some places, cohabitation = common law marriage after a certain period. In others, the term 'rent' = tenancy and certain rights. Consulting an attorney to find the ideal agreement is important before allowing someone to live in one's home. In the case of partners on the road to marriage, this can even protect the one moving in, such as a clause that rent = contribution toward ownership, and in the case of marriage, the renter gets added to the title of the home. Link to post Share on other sites
Gebidozo Posted September 22 Share Posted September 22 1 hour ago, Gaeta said: He bought the apartment *by himself* and then invite her to move in = possibly he's not serious about her because her being his tenant is not a relationship commitment toward her, it's a business deal. Exactly, that’s the vibe I got from that. Link to post Share on other sites
Gebidozo Posted September 22 Share Posted September 22 42 minutes ago, Leihla_B said: Whoa! That's a whole lot of assumption! Plenty of people buy homes and take on roommates. Roommates, yes… but not people you sleep with. I still can’t get it. Suppose I have my own house, there is no way I’ll have anyone there for a duration of more than a month or so unless it’s 1) tenant 2) the love of my life. Link to post Share on other sites
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