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thisGuy

Ok please let me have your input on my situation. I am in the beginning of getting divorce, but still togather because of kids but not romantically. Well I met this girl on line and we both have fallen pretty hard for each other. From the beginning she had told me about a guy that would visit a few times a year and basically hook up. At the beginning of things they had not talked for months. Recently he reached out to her and now he is coming in town next week. She will be off the grid for a couple weeks while he is there. I do not know how I should feel about this situation.

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d0nnivain

You can feel anyway you like but you can't say anything.  You are not divorced.  That means you are not as much of a free agent as you would to be & while you still live with your wife, you can't very well expect monogamy from some woman you have recently met on line.  Have you even taken things off line with this woman & met her in person?  

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thisGuy

Donnivan I am by no means asking her to be monogamous with me. We are extremely open like share our darkest secrets and have talked into detail about past partners. She talked a lot about him when she thought he was from the past. There are things that I can not get out of my head and it just kind of burns thinking about it. 

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d0nnivain

Then going forward tell her you'd rather not know.  Ignorance is bliss as they say 

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Wiseman2

Please see a licensed qualified therapist to confide in and for ongoing support. It's tempting to share horror stories about partners with desperate people looking to considerate, but as you can see it's making another mess in addition to your divorce. 

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I agree see a therapist.

you have no way to make demands on anyone you may date due to still being married.

but more than that you said you don’t know how you should feel. Do the work to know exactly how you feel in any situation. Recognizing your own feelings is 90% of having a decent life. 

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