ohso Posted December 9, 2023 Share Posted December 9, 2023 (edited) I've started seeing this new friend for couple of times, and at first she seemed great but later I wasn't sure are we a good match. I tried to give her one more chance but every time I asked her out she said she was busy. So I kind of gave up on her altogether. Few months forward, she texts me if I'm free for a coffee, but I wasn't so I politely declined and said some other time. Then she started attacking ME how she wants to hang out and we should since it takes effort to build a friendship. Well I agree but it was mostly HER who couldn't hang out before. And she says it seems to her that I just want to drink coffee and it's her who actually cares. well it seems to me she only wants to hang out when she can on her terms. I tried to explain myself to her why I can't today and she should try to understand me. She replied that she doesn't give a damn if someone understands her and she only cares if someone puts effort to hang out. At that point I stopped replying to her. To me it's crucial we understand each other to have a friendship and not only put work and time into building a friendship. I was indecisive about her almost from the beginning and after this I think we're not a good match. It feels like it's forced, too much pressure and control. And we're fighting early on over stupidity. What do you think? What on earth does she want then if she doesn't care if I understand her?! I mean, what is going on here? Edited December 9, 2023 by ohso Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted December 9, 2023 Share Posted December 9, 2023 Does it matter? She's rude & you already know that trying to be friends with her doesn't work for you because it's a one way street on her terms only. Next. . .. Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted December 9, 2023 Share Posted December 9, 2023 Are you likely to run into her anywhere? If not just forget about her, she sounds very draining. Sending her a pic of a middle finger is an option, but not necessary as blocking her will also give her the same message . Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted December 9, 2023 Share Posted December 9, 2023 Just back away if you're not hitting it off and getting together is this much of a headache. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted December 9, 2023 Share Posted December 9, 2023 3 hours ago, ohso said: she said she was busy........ I politely declined and said some other time. These responses both sound like the responses given if we're trying to give someone a brush off. Please tell me that this wasn't verbatim! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Acacia98 Posted December 9, 2023 Share Posted December 9, 2023 On all those occasions when she declined, I'm guessing you did not throw a tantrum or demand an explanation. So now that the shoe's on the other foot, you shouldn't feel the need to justify yourself. She sounds exhausting. Just close the chapter and focus on other people. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted December 10, 2023 Share Posted December 10, 2023 If any friend of mine talked to me like that.... I would tell them to have a nice life and immediately block them. No one needs friends like that. I wouldn't tolerate that and neither should you. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted December 10, 2023 Share Posted December 10, 2023 14 hours ago, ohso said: What do you think? I think she's a weirdo and I'd lose her number. Find other people to hang out with and block this one. Link to post Share on other sites
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