am I at AH?

[iloveicecreamcake]

we are going on a french trip in january to Belgium. We are going to Belgium and staying in the youth hostel . The problem comes because the biggest rooms are rooms of 4 and 5/6 out of my friend group are going. So originally i was going to room with P and O but after school i decided against. O and I argue quite a bit - even though we are very close . So i text them that i was going to room with L And N instead . O proceeded to tell me i was dead to her and blah blah blah. I thought it was a joke and laughed it off. Today in school - she has been ignoring me and being blatantly rude and disrespectful ans snapping at others for no reason. I told them the reason i switched. She moved from sitting next in form time to the opposite side of the table. called me an idiot when i didn't understand what was going in a convo. this trip is really important because this is kinda the only time i can take a break from school and my family. when we come back we have exams. So im sticking with my decision . if i don't talk to her for however long i dont care . i will not be bullied into crossing my boundaries . am i in the wrong

[ShyViolet]

3 hours ago, iloveicecreamcake said:

O and I argue quite a bit - even though we are very close . 

Why are you friends with this person at all, let alone "very close"?  She sounds very immature and like just not a nice person.  I wouldn't go on a trip with her at all and I certainly would consider the friendship completely over at this point.  Who needs friends like that?

I'm not understanding why going on this trip is the only time you can get a break from school and your family?  It sounds like this trip will be full of drama.

[stillafool]

3 hours ago, iloveicecreamcake said:

So im sticking with my decision . if i don't talk to her for however long i dont care . i will not be bullied into crossing my boundaries . am i in the wrong

Yes stick to your decision and don't let her call you an idiot without getting her back, don't be bullied.  No you are not wrong.

[iloveicecreamcake]

sorry i didnt make this clear earlier we are still in school this trip to Belgium is a school trip we have been friends for just under 4 years : yr 7 to now . Im always with family im kinda like my mums handbag. O is acc a very sweet person but when she becomes defensive- can be quite nasty and b****y . she doesnt like to be told the truth at all 

[basil67]

When you texted O to tell her that you'd found other room mates, how did you word it?

[Wiseman2]

5 hours ago, iloveicecreamcake said:

. this trip is really important because this is kinda the only time i can take a break from school and my family. 

How old is she? Try to enjoy your trip. You can't change people.

Maybe she's having trouble at home or something. Try to be kind and more mature than her.  Be friendly with people and they will be friendly with you. Catfights aren't worth it. Make sure you have a variety of nice friends. 

She doesn't need to "hear the truth", because, actually, it's just your opinion. Basically you can make this as uncomfortable or pleasant as you want to. 

[iloveicecreamcake]

i said hi guys i want to room with L and N instead. and she replied “ atp i dont care “  so i took that as a yes

[MsJayne]

O sounds like a drama queen, stick to your accommodation plan. When she insults you next, because you know she will, pounce on it and point out that she's often not pleasant to be around and that's why you don't want to room with her.  Saying "You're dead to me" is just immature and nasty, so the call-out will do her good. Well done you for having boundaries and not allowing your holiday to be spoiled by rooming with a horrid little cow.

[basil67]

1 hour ago, iloveicecreamcake said:

i said hi guys i want to room with L and N instead. and she replied “ atp i dont care “  so i took that as a yes

As you were changing existing plans, a bit of tact could well have given you a better outcome

[Alpacalia]

Did you commit to rooming with P and O in the first place? If so, you might have been in the wrong when you went against those first commitments. Each of the people who are going with you – P, O, L, and N – have their own commitments and their own opportunity to make a vote either way and it if the majority agrees with you, you’re not doing anything wrong.

Mind this trip doesn’t happen often, everyone might want—as a matter of courtesy–you to pin down notification of change you’re making as soon as you can to assure there’s enough time to find somebody to replace you in the room.

Maybe you could have paid attention to that or asked if L and N could room with you from the start if that was even theoretically possible. That said, her reaction was pretty over the top and uncalled for. If you made a decision that is best for you and it doesn’t harm anyone else, then you are not in the wrong.

[glows]

6 hours ago, iloveicecreamcake said:

sorry i didnt make this clear earlier we are still in school this trip to Belgium is a school trip we have been friends for just under 4 years : yr 7 to now . Im always with family im kinda like my mums handbag. O is acc a very sweet person but when she becomes defensive- can be quite nasty and b****y . she doesnt like to be told the truth at all 

Don’t bother confronting people like this if you know what they’re like. Not sure what “truth” was spoken in the midst of all this aside from this rooming issue. Just avoid. Pick your battles and stick with the big picture - that’s a pleasant school trip. Let things cool off with this classmate and don’t give anyone a reason to pick sides or cause fights. 

[d0nnivain]

You hurt her feelings & she's acting out.  She'll get over it.  Stick to your decision.