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Mom after sabotaging my dating life wanting me to marry and have kids.Why?


siren8272

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I talked in another thread area where my mom said I shouldnt have kids because id be a bad mom. All because i simply said I liked the IDEA of gentle parenting which is really authoritative/attachment parenting. I have loads of stories feel free to look up my past post i have nothing to hide. Anyways today my mom recently started saying i should have kids and get married because her best friend has no kids ,unmarried and my mom says shes the most miserable person she knows. My mom would sabotage my dating life as an older teen, young adult (which i was picky about dating guys even as a teen ive dated 7 people TOTAL in my lifetime) screamed in my face if i talked to a boy and made me take a pregnancy test at age ten because I was ONE week late in my first year having a period(negative of course, i didnt like my guy classmates then and they are in prison in 2022) . I have an almost PHD and if not for her being sick, and the diseases flying around id have a more active social life. Why now at age 40 when i dont want kids and its higher risk? It is odd.

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You should tell your Mom to stay out of your dating life.

it’s terrible she would tell you to get married and have kids.

just inform her you’ll make decisions about your future, not her.

can you move away from your abusive Mom?

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Yes, I remember your stories about your mom clearly.   What is your living situation at present?  Can you distance yourself from your mother?

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2 hours ago, siren8272 said:

  Why now at age 40 when i dont want kids and its higher risk.

Sorry this is happening. Do you live with your mother? It may be best to distance yourself if she is this toxic. Perhaps she's a broken person who unfortunately passed on her chaotic inner turbulence.

All you can do is break the cycle of this and distance yourself. 

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If you live with your mother you need to move out and be on your own.  It's good you have a good education so you can support yourself.  Your mother may just be worried about your being alone after she's gone so she made that comment.  Naturally she will feel differently about your dating life as a teen and young woman versus being a woman of 40. Most parents are trying to help, but their comments can get on your nerves at times that's why it's best not to live with them and just visit.

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