Was my boss flirting with me [merge of multiple threads]

[suckykey]

My supervisor asked me a question and i answered in a way that could be interpreted in a sexually suggestive way - so  I stopped mid way and laughed. So he asked me the question again and he winked at me. Why did he wink?

Edited August 14, 2022 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
merged threads

[basil67]

He most likely winked because he appreciates a double entendre and thought it was funny.  

Edited August 2, 2022 by basil67

[NuevoYorko]

 

Why would it matter? I hope you were ultimately able to appropriately respond to your supervisor.    

It appears that he doesn't think you need to be written up for  harassment or anything and that he took your unprofessional behavior lightly.  Going forward, leave the sexual innuendos outside of your workplace.  

 

[suckykey]

37 minutes ago, NuevoYorko said:

 

Why would it matter? I hope you were ultimately able to appropriately respond to your supervisor.    

It appears that he doesn't think you need to be written up for  harassment or anything and that he took your unprofessional behavior lightly.  Going forward, leave the sexual innuendos outside of your workplace.  

 

I totally did not mean it - and I only realized that it could be interpreted in a sexually suggestive way  when a colleague during the conversation said that " you have a  dirty mind - huh' .. then I realized what I am saying could be interpreted differently and I laughed out of embarrassment. Then my boss winked at me and asked me the question again when he totally understood my answer first time around.

[NuevoYorko]

Move on.  It's not worth a second thought. 

[Wiseman2]

8 hours ago, suckykey said:

 i answered in a way that could be interpreted in a sexually suggestive way - 

Try to avoid this type of thing. It's unprofessional. The workplace is not a singles club and if your superiors talk to you act professional.

Date outside the workplace. Making sexual inuendos to your boss isn't a good idea.

[suckykey]

3 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Try to avoid this type of thing. It's unprofessional. The workplace is not a singles club and if your superiors talk to you act professional.

Date outside the workplace. Making sexual inuendos to your boss isn't a good idea.

 

 

I totally did not mean it - and I only realized that it could be interpreted in a sexually suggestive way  when a colleague during the conversation said that " you have a  dirty mind - huh' .. then I realized what I am saying could be interpreted differently and I laughed out of embarrassment. Then my boss winked at me and asked me the question again when he totally understood my answer first time around.

[suckykey]

[Thank you for the responses] Who was out of line? 

Edited August 2, 2022 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
merged threads

[justwhoiam]

Well, at times the dirty mind seems to be in others like:

- Did you finish working on the Smith Project?

- Of course. You gave it to me earlier!

It would have been fine if you hadn't laughed at it/yourself, because that just meant you were not innocent about it. Play your part better next time, or as others told you: avoid innuendos.

[basil67]

I don't think anyone was out of line.  If I understand correctly, you accidentally made a joke you both laughed and then you both moved on. 

Accidents happen.  As long as it's not something you do all the time, don't worry about it.

Edited August 3, 2022 by basil67

[ExpatInItaly]

21 hours ago, suckykey said:

Who was out of line? 

Nobody, because there was no flirting. He tried to make a potentially awkward comment funny. That's all. 

Do you want him to flirt with you? 

[stillafool]

On 8/2/2022 at 9:51 AM, suckykey said:

[Thank you for the responses] Who was out of line? 

No one was so you're safe.

[suckykey]

My coworker said "you have a dirty mind - huh" during one of my work meetings and in front of my manger. Is that inappropriate and how to best deal with him?

[Wiseman2]

5 hours ago, suckykey said:

. Is that inappropriate and how to best deal with him?

Let it go. Try to balance work relationships with an open mind and even if someone's sense of humor is not your taste, try to relax and not let it get to you. It's doubtful this is serious sexual harassment or something that needs to be "dealt with".

[mark clemson]

Consider talking to your HR dept about procedures for addressing sexual harassment in case this behavior intensifies.

[stillafool]

20 hours ago, suckykey said:

My coworker said "you have a dirty mind - huh" during one of my work meetings and in front of my manger. Is that inappropriate and how to best deal with him?

Did he just say this out of the blue or was he referencing something? Or, are you still talking about the incident that happened with your boss at the end of July?

[NuevoYorko]

On 8/7/2022 at 7:38 PM, suckykey said:

My coworker said "you have a dirty mind - huh" during one of my work meetings and in front of my manger. Is that inappropriate and how to best deal with him?

Stop!  It's not healthy to obsess about a trivial exchange like this.  I'm not sure what you're after here.  I think it's already been made clear that the majority of people here would not think it worthy of any attention.

Yet you keep bringing it up and even starting multiple threads.  This latest one leaves out the part where you made a sexual innuendo (on accident, of course.)

In any case, the best way to deal with this is to stop thinking about it and be careful of engaging with your manager and co-workers in inappropriate ways.  IMO even focussing on this at work is inappropriate in itself.  So move on already.  

[suckykey]

If your boss tells you to feed his ego - how do you go about that?

[Alpacalia]

In your other thread, was it your boss who held the door open for you?

He has been the subject of a lot of posts from you.

However, to answer your question, you don't.

[stillafool]

I would ignore a comment like that the first time.  If said again I would have to say "that is not in my job description" and walk away.  What was your reply Suckykey?

[basil67]

We cannot begin to answer this with any accuracy when you've not described his tone or the context of your conversation. 

Given that you've put this question in a 'friendship' category, I'm going to guess that this was just one comment in a whole series of banter between the two of you and you're making for more of it than you ought to.

Edited August 14, 2022 by basil67

[stillafool]

1 hour ago, suckykey said:

If your boss tells you to feed his ego - how do you go about that?

You would get more replies if you gave more info, but of course that is up to you.

[Wiseman2]

7 hours ago, suckykey said:

If your boss tells you to feed his ego - how do you go about that?

He didn't actually say that. You have a crush so would you like tips on how to flatter the boss?

[glows]

16 hours ago, suckykey said:

If your boss tells you to feed his ego - how do you go about that?

I might have said something like “The trash is outside and free for the taking.”

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. It’s probably time to decide whether you’d like to have the workplace for work or for social/dating ops. It’s not a good idea to mix the two. If you have a crush that’s fine. In the end this is a paycheque so treat it that way.

[stillafool]

10 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

He didn't actually say that. You have a crush so would you like tips on how to flatter the boss?

If you are developing a crush on your boss you need to "cool it".  That is a recipe for disaster and a straight path to lose your job.  Get interested in guys you don't work with.