mortensorchid Posted July 19, 2022 Share Posted July 19, 2022 A few weeks ago my childhood friend C said he had a project brewing for me. He had this friend Bob who he thinks would be a good match for me and he wants us to meet. A little background for me and him and the situation... C is my oldest friend, we met in preschool. Our parents somehow knew each other and we've been friends all our lives. When we were 12 they moved to Michigan for his father's job and remained there. We'd see each other for lightening stops on the holidays when they would come through to visit friends / relatives. When I was in my early/mid 20s, I went up for a visit also to see another friend who moved nearby (has since left and moved to the west coast) and I ended up in a LDR with his friend who I will call Frank. Frank and I would write emails almost everyday, I went to see him and he never came to see me. Long story short, this lasted about a year when he was supposed to come and see me, then canceled at the last minute, then broke it off via email after some very angry exchanges - didn't even have the courtesy of a phone call. Barely a year later he married another woman and remains married to her to this day. It is now 20+ years later and he said he had this other friend he wants to introduce me to. This guy sent me a friend request a few hours ago and I accepted. Problem? I know nothing about this guy other than his name. And he lives in Colorado. Do I even bother with this? C is hopeful because he said he met his wife when someone fixed them up, she lived in California and he was in Michigan. They are now married. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted July 19, 2022 Share Posted July 19, 2022 My husband and I were fixed up too! You've got nothing to lose if you start chatting to him - but I'd advise you against getting into a LDR if either of you is not willing to travel and there isn't a plan to be together at some stage. You don't want a repeat of your previous LDR where you made all the effort Link to post Share on other sites
Author mortensorchid Posted July 19, 2022 Author Share Posted July 19, 2022 (edited) That is my fear. I know nothing about this guy save for his name and the fact he lives in Colorado. I was in another LDR that lasted 2 years which we did the right way - we both saw each other a lot and we both traveled to see one another until he broke it off at rhe 2 year mark because it was time to make the commitment or not and he chose not. But I am letting him move on this if he wants to start something. Just because I accepted the friend request doesn't mean anything will happen right? Edited July 19, 2022 by a LoveShack.org Moderator remove quote Link to post Share on other sites
Author mortensorchid Posted July 26, 2022 Author Share Posted July 26, 2022 He sent me a friend request and I accepted it a few days / weeks ago, but he hasn't reached out to me once or even liked an update or anything. Moving on I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
BrinnM Posted July 29, 2022 Share Posted July 29, 2022 Wait, what’s with the other guy? The one (also from Facebook) that you’re writing about in your “taking it to the next level” thread? Or is that one and the same guy? I’m so confused with all these Facebook dates & acquaintances. Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted August 1, 2022 Share Posted August 1, 2022 On 7/19/2022 at 5:13 AM, mortensorchid said: He had this friend Bob who he thinks would be a good match for me and he wants us to meet. Do I even bother with this? Do not settle to visit anyone again. You said you don't know anything about him except for his name. Don't you have his Facebook account? How did he send you a friend request? Where? If you meant Facebook, did he ever post anything? Commented on anything? Does he have his last name on Facebook? Ask your friend C for his buddy's (middle name and) last name, date and place of birth. Then run a check online about him, you'll get info about wherever he lived (owned/rented houses/apartments), mortgages, debts, problems with the law, etc, previous marriages, kids, etc. Then, if there's nothing wrong coming up from that check, you google him and check what he's done with his facebook account. If he doesn't come across as a moron, then you might start messaging with him through Facebook. Tell him about your likes and dislikes (cooking, traveling, social media approach, job, family, etc. and ask the same about him). If you think he might be a match for you, then you could gauge his will to come and visit you. Staying in a hotel, obviously. If he's tight with money, just move on. You're not 20 anymore, you need something better than that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mortensorchid Posted August 2, 2022 Author Share Posted August 2, 2022 This guy as mentioned in this thread lives in Colorado like I said. He sent me a friend request and I accepted it, but he has not reached out beyond that (saying hello in a PM, liked an update or post, etc.). And even if he does at this point, I will let it stand because of the fact that he hasn't reached out and that there is someone else that has caught my attention. Link to post Share on other sites
justwhoiam Posted August 18, 2022 Share Posted August 18, 2022 Good, forget about that guy! Link to post Share on other sites
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