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ms.stressed

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I don't know anything about life or love... nothing...just how to live it. 

I'm so scared of failing... getting it all wrong...then failing again...

I'm scared...

 

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I wonder if second chances are given...do people give second chances?

Do men go back to their exes?

I need to move on. 

I'm a single parent...I like being single. 

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Hmm. The vast majority of relationships end, so it's certainly nothing unusual. When I hear people speak of "failed" relationships I think it's worth pointing out that they are really just normal relationships that ended, as most do.

If you have a relationship and it ends, there were good times and bad times. If you DON'T have one, then you spend that duration of time without one, and it's a part of your life where you were without one. If you prefer to be in a relationship, it's probably better to start one, just with caution WRT who you choose and what might happen.

They say you have to kiss a lot of frogs - if you're not kissing ANY frogs, you are probably "removing yourself from the game". That's fine IF that's what you're actually happy with.

Unfortunately nothing can guarantee success 5 and 10 years down the road, even if a person seems perfect at the start or a year in. I can tell you that the core of a lasting relationship is a decision by both partners to continue it. Nothing more and nothing less. Sometimes awful relationships endure and sometimes wonderful ones end due to this fact.

Edited by mark clemson
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6 hours ago, ms.stressed said:

I wonder if second chances are given...do people give second chances?

Do men go back to their exes?

Like anyone else, some do. Some don't. 

The majority of reconciliations I have seen don't work out in the end, though. 

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9 hours ago, ms.stressed said:

 

I'm scared...

 

 

9 hours ago, ms.stressed said:

I need to move on. 

I'm a single parent...I like being single. 

Care for your kids and take care of yourself too. Being with someone shouldn’t fill you with terror or completely destabilize your mental health and make you a jittery hurt mess. If you’re in doubt place your kids and your well-being as your first priorities. Let the rest fall into place.

Look for reliable and stable means of support as a single parent. The worst thing you can do is jump from one dysfunctional relationship to another or back into one that was not working. 

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14 hours ago, ms.stressed said:

I don't know anything about life or love... nothing...just how to live it. 

I'm so scared of failing... getting it all wrong...then failing again...

I'm scared...

 

Don't be afraid of failure. We all fail sometimes. As long as you are putting forth your best effort, take comfort in that and learn from the mistakes you do make. 

 

14 hours ago, ms.stressed said:

I wonder if second chances are given...do people give second chances?

Do men go back to their exes?

I need to move on. 

I'm a single parent...I like being single.

Are you sure it's not just a "comfort" thing - wanting your ex back because of the familiarity and being afraid of the unknown? Do you have a support system? Family/Friends? If not, try making connections with some single parent groups in your area. I don't blame you for enjoying being a single parent. While I'm sure it's hard and challenging, you also don't have to fight anyone about how to raise your children. 

Before your consider giving a second chance for the wrong reason, first give yourself a chance to succeed on your own. Practice some self-care so you can be the best mom possible to your kids. Trust yourself and don't be afraid!  Stay strong!

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