Author Otter2569 Posted November 3, 2021 Author Posted November 3, 2021 8 minutes ago, Shining One said: Are you hoping to keep the door open to sleeping with any of these women in the future? No not at all. I could really care less. I have actually been hoping this long distance chic, who is acting like a drama queen, just goes away!
Author Otter2569 Posted November 3, 2021 Author Posted November 3, 2021 3 hours ago, Wiseman2 said: Anyway if she's a real Klingon, and want to get rid of her, you could tell her you took that pic outside the clinic where you were treated for crabs. That may help her move on. Keeping this one in my back pocket LOL
Author Otter2569 Posted November 3, 2021 Author Posted November 3, 2021 1 hour ago, basil67 said: If you want her to go away, you need to take steps so that she can't see updates about you on social media. If your profile is public, block her. If it's private, unfriend her. This chic is in full blown crisis mode. Delete and block is in her future!
Alpacalia Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 1 hour ago, basil67 said: If you want her to go away, you need to take steps so that she can't see updates about you on social media. If your profile is public, block her. If it's private, unfriend her. Seems like the easiest thing to do.
ExpatInItaly Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 4 hours ago, Otter2569 said: This chic is in full blown crisis mode. Delete and block is in her future! Why not just do it now?
Wiseman2 Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 9 hours ago, Otter2569 said: No not at all. I could really care less. I have actually been hoping this long distance chic, who is acting like a drama queen, just goes away! Yes. This is the time to review your social media accounts and settings and make things more private. Only allow people you know and trust to view your content. As far as Klingon girl, delete and block.
Author Otter2569 Posted November 3, 2021 Author Posted November 3, 2021 6 hours ago, ExpatInItaly said: Why not just do it now? Done - immediately after she sent 2 long IMs last night (which I did not read).
Fox Sake Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 18 hours ago, Otter2569 said: In the last few months I have dated several different women. Some I have slept with and some I have not. A woman I dated recently posted pics of us together on social media and now other women / former dates are asking about my status with her (because we look so happy together) and whether or not we've slept together (we have). I don't think I need to disclose my sex life or explain my actions to a large degree so am struggling how best to address these questions (text messages)? I do enjoy being with the woman I am pictured with and envision it becoming more than casual dating. I do not see myself wanting to be more than friends with the women who are asking BUT I also don't want to be a jerk about it either. Any thoughts on how handle this? Correct me if I’m wrong. I get the impression that there are one or two of these other girls that you are actually attracted to. (Plan b’s) You said you just see them as friends. If that’s the case then why does it bother you so much to tell them that you’re happy and your status with her? You clearly know that some of these people are attracted to you as well and I get the feeling that you don’t want to burn bridges. Begs the question too, WHY are these women asking if you have slept together? You must be giving them some sort of attention to keep them on the back boiler to ask you things like this… 3
Author Otter2569 Posted November 3, 2021 Author Posted November 3, 2021 1 hour ago, Fox Sake said: Begs the question too, WHY are these women asking if you have slept together? You must be giving them some sort of attention to keep them on the back boiler to ask you things like this… There are 4 women including the pic chic that I was out with in the last few months. I have known all of them for several years - a few 30 years + so they are not casual aquaintences (sp). I would prefer to remain cordial if possible. The 1000 mile \ 1 week 3 date woman is asking all the questions and is acting like we were engaged or something - it's over the top. Others have asked in a normal manner. Any time someone intrudes into my life or crosses a boundary my gut reaction is to tell them to butt out. Knowing this woman is fragile (aka crazy) and looking to move back to this area I prefer to be more diplomatic...if possible.
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 20 hours ago, Otter2569 said: In the last few months I have dated several different women. Some I have slept with and some I have not. A woman I dated recently posted pics of us together on social media and now other women / former dates are asking about my status with her (because we look so happy together) and whether or not we've slept together (we have). I don't think I need to disclose my sex life or explain my actions to a large degree so am struggling how best to address these questions (text messages)? I do enjoy being with the woman I am pictured with and envision it becoming more than casual dating. I do not see myself wanting to be more than friends with the women who are asking BUT I also don't want to be a jerk about it either. Any thoughts on how handle this? Maybe put a little more effort in making sure these women know it's only casual? What's clear as day to you may not be clear to them. It seems they think things could potentially turn into romance. 3
notbroken Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 I like the idea of saying 'we are just starting to date' and leave it at that. If they push say 'I never kiss and tell - nor not kiss and tell - it just isn't gentlemanly'. If they keep pushing, you'll definitely have to block them. The other alternative on the long distance one is to tell her that while you like her, the distance is too great, you aren't really ready for a long distance relationship, and you would like to remain friends (ie. let her down easy). No good can come from disclosing too much. 1
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 19 hours ago, Starswillshine said: If she is asking, just be completely honest, imo. A lot of men don't want to do this, as they know it will lower their chances for s*x. 3
Author Otter2569 Posted November 3, 2021 Author Posted November 3, 2021 8 minutes ago, GeorgiaPeach1 said: A lot of men don't want to do this, as they know it will lower their chances for s*x. I am sure that I could have handled things better but at this point I dont care to have sex with the other three and all for different reasons - the common denominator being lack of a deeper connection. The 1000 mile women came in hot: sex talk, naked pics so it was pretty well laid out. Once I took the bait she got all clingy and couple-ish. I was more than happy for her to leave.
elaine567 Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 36 minutes ago, Otter2569 said: There are 4 women including the pic chic that I was out with in the last few months. I have known all of them for several years - a few 30 years + so they are not casual aquaintences (sp). I would prefer to remain cordial if possible. The 1000 mile \ 1 week 3 date woman is asking all the questions and is acting like we were engaged or something - it's over the top. Others have asked in a normal manner. Any time someone intrudes into my life or crosses a boundary my gut reaction is to tell them to butt out. Knowing this woman is fragile (aka crazy) and looking to move back to this area I prefer to be more diplomatic...if possible. You treated friends you have known for up to thirty years as casual sex partners... If a guy I had known for years asked me out on a date I would assume he was serious about me, not just using me for sex... With a friend like you, who needs enemies? 5
Wiseman2 Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 (edited) 29 minutes ago, Otter2569 said: I am sure that I could have handled things better but at this point I dont care to have sex with the other three and all for different reasons Keep women you hookup with off your social media. Use text. Make sure you reset your social media so you keep your private life private. Don't add bunches of women you had sex with to your friends/following lists. Edited November 3, 2021 by Wiseman2 2
Pumpernickel Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 5 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: Keep women you hookup with off your social media. Yes!!! 1
Alpacalia Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 41 minutes ago, Otter2569 said: I was more than happy for her to leave. The easiest way to do that would have to been to tell her that you are romantically involved with the other woman. Or like others have said, just deleted and block. It's odd that you chose not to. 3
Starswillshine Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 I took this post to mean, you are dating multiple people.... and one of these people put up a picture of the two of you. Which prompted these other women you are dating to ask questions. If I am dating someone, I would want to know if they are banging others as well. And I expect honesty or else I'm out. Apparently, you haven't made that clear that it is not monogamous. 6 1
JRabbit Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 Why do you need to keep these women on your social media?? That I don't get. Just because you know them or they are in your town doesn't mean you have to be FB friends or follow each other. 2
Wiseman2 Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 Put women in categories on social media. Family. Completely platonic friends like neighbors, co-workers, etc. One GF, if you're exclusive and a couple. Otherwise keep randoms off social media. Less headaches and nosy questions that way.. 1
Ami1uwant Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 On 11/2/2021 at 2:05 PM, Otter2569 said: In the last few months I have dated several different women. Some I have slept with and some I have not. A woman I dated recently posted pics of us together on social media and now other women / former dates are asking about my status with her (because we look so happy together) and whether or not we've slept together (we have). I don't think I need to disclose my sex life or explain my actions to a large degree so am struggling how best to address these questions (text messages)? I do enjoy being with the woman I am pictured with and envision it becoming more than casual dating. I do not see myself wanting to be more than friends with the women who are asking BUT I also don't want to be a jerk about it either. Any thoughts on how handle this? Let me get this straight… 1 you dated women 2 slept withthem 3 friends on social media 4 blew them off and dated others 5. they are now wondering if you slept with her too? 1
Uruktopi Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 5 hours ago, elaine567 said: You treated friends you have known for up to thirty years as casual sex partners... If a guy I had known for years asked me out on a date I would assume he was serious about me, not just using me for sex... With a friend like you, who needs enemies? You are right 2
OatsAndHall Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 You don't owe anyone an explanation as long as you were clear about your casual intentions. If you weren't, I would suggest rectifying that and then removing these women from social media. From here on out, I would learn from this; it's best to disengage from women that you have a casual relationship with. You may make it clear that you don't intend to be monogamous with a woman but that doesn't mean that there isn't a strong potential for issues down the road. I had a three month long "casual streak" before I settled down with my gf and it got a bit messy, even though I was upfront about what I was looking for. Sex can complicate things in a hurry, even when being honest about what you are or aren't looking for.
spiderowl Posted November 3, 2021 Posted November 3, 2021 (edited) On 11/2/2021 at 6:05 PM, Otter2569 said: In the last few months I have dated several different women. Some I have slept with and some I have not. A woman I dated recently posted pics of us together on social media and now other women / former dates are asking about my status with her (because we look so happy together) and whether or not we've slept together (we have). I don't think I need to disclose my sex life or explain my actions to a large degree so am struggling how best to address these questions (text messages)? I do enjoy being with the woman I am pictured with and envision it becoming more than casual dating. I do not see myself wanting to be more than friends with the women who are asking BUT I also don't want to be a jerk about it either. Any thoughts on how handle this? If you are in a relationship with or are sleeping with any of these other women, then you owe them the truth - or at least that you might be having more than a friends relationship with this woman. It would not be right to lead other women to think you were only sleeping with them or in a relationship with them if that was not the case. It sounds like you'd like to be in a relationship with this woman but are not sure if it will happen yet. Meanwhile, you are keeping the others hanging on. If they are just curious friends (not FWBs) then you don't have to tell them, though I am sure they will tease you about it. Edited November 3, 2021 by spiderowl 1
Noproblem Posted November 4, 2021 Posted November 4, 2021 so a playboy hates to be asked if he sleeping with his new girl? 1
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