Casual sex experience during covid

[HazelBliss]

Covid had many stuck in their homes, afraid to go out and be around people. I have been very cautious the past year esp because I am a nurse who works around it. I have also been dodging men, declining dates, meetups, etc....  so it has been a lonely year.  My friend and I said SCREW IT and planned a trip to Orlando, FL for a couple days where we met these guys and went out on a date. I questioned my date about covid and other things even though it meant nothing as I didn't have actual proof, but I went ahead and enjoyed the date. It was a good night.

Long story short, we were intimate... never had a one night stand before..but it was the best experience I have ever had. I didn't stop him when he was kissing me.. I def didn't stop him when he did other things so the downside to all of this is the waiting game and making sure my tests stay negative for work and my family. My 80 year old mother lives with me. I am not a one night stand type of gal but I have been isolating myself since covid started..and really needed that type of connection. He still keeps in touch... very attractive male.. but not someone I would want to be serious with as he was very aggressive with me so I am assuming he does this with other women. I'm not so sure I would want to continue that type of relationship. I would rather experience everything he did to me in a solid, trusting relationship! Hoping and praying..... UGH!

 

Are any singles here afraid to be intimate because of pandemic? My friend and her date had masked sex, doggystyle  LOL...(tmi) I couldn't even think to do that... we were heavily in the moment.. Now I am freaking out for 2 weeks or so.. I think I will be okay.. FINGERS CROSSED lol

 

 

[d0nnivain]

Why not just get a rapid test?  put your mind at ease.  

[HazelBliss]

Just now, d0nnivain said:

Why not just get a rapid test?  put your mind at ease.  

I just got back from the trip. My job tests twice a week and I am taking my second test today. I won't feel comfortable with results until the second set of tests.

[Wiseman2]

Ok, sounds like a great vacation fling. Get your tests, vaccines, etc. and see if this peters out or develops into anything (doubtful). But once you are vaccinated you can go have fun again. 

[ShyViolet]

Are you vaccinated?

[HazelBliss]

3 hours ago, ShyViolet said:

Are you vaccinated?

I am not. I do have mixed feelings about it as far as the length of immunity goes, so I am seeing how things play out. I am not 100 percent against it. 

[elaine567]

11 hours ago, d0nnivain said:

Why not just get a rapid test?  put your mind at ease.  

These tests are not accurate enough.

[Blind-Sided]

2 hours ago, elaine567 said:

These tests are not accurate enough.

I agree.  When COVID went through my family... my brother was sick, (With real symptoms) and the rapid test came back negative.  We knew he had it because I had it, and my mom and dad had it.  It was 3 days later that the lab test came back positive.  But at that point... he didn't need a test to tell him he had COVID. 

I'm glad your fling went well... but the reality is... you need to keep yourself away from your mom.  This is how it spared so quick... you will be highly contagious for days before you "Feel Sick".  BUT... then again... you may be contagious and be asymptomatic. I've met 2 people who were 100% symptom free, and felt fine, but tested positive.

[d0nnivain]

5 hours ago, elaine567 said:

These tests are not accurate enough.

Understood but her post read as a bit panicky to me so this would be a faster way to bring peace & hopefully keep the 80 year old grandma safe until the 14 days passed or she got a PCR test. 

[elaine567]

If it isn't accurate enough how could that bring peace?

[ShyViolet]

At least where I am, PCR test results come back in 24 hours.  Get a PCR test to find out for sure.

And then......... there is a very simple solution to this ........ GET VACCINATED.  

[d0nnivain]

I have had PCR tests come back in 24 hours but I have also had to wait 96 hours.   

It doesn't really matter.  through her work the OP gets tested every 2 weeks anyway & her latest test was negative so it's all good. She's probably at greater risk at work around sick people then out in the world where people are healthier.   If her sex partner was sick odds are he wouldn't be on vacation.  Granted that is not a guarantee but I'll take the odds on the sexy guy over the sick person in a medical setting.  

[HazelBliss]

53 minutes ago, d0nnivain said:

I have had PCR tests come back in 24 hours but I have also had to wait 96 hours.   

It doesn't really matter.  through her work the OP gets tested every 2 weeks anyway & her latest test was negative so it's all good. She's probably at greater risk at work around sick people then out in the world where people are healthier.   If her sex partner was sick odds are he wouldn't be on vacation.  Granted that is not a guarantee but I'll take the odds on the sexy guy over the sick person in a medical setting.  

I get tested twice a week Mondays and Thursdays. and ur right. I was also more concerned about being at those parks, So far my friend and I feel okay.. I am staying away from my mother as much as I can. 

[smackie9]

I know people have ants in their pants and want things back to normal.....sorry to be a downer but two people in my life died from Covid, one just this week. Why take any kind of risk?

[DatingMom]

I agree, get vaccinated. I have been dating throughout COVID, and have been intimate with a few men, but it was so nerve wrecking! I would question them to death before sleeping with them about their habits, who they had been seeing in the last two weeks, who those people had been seeing. They would just look at me with big eyes (but still wanted the sex).

Now that I'm vaccinated and dates are vaccinated too (or at least one dose), it's such a relief. Vaccines are not 100% and one should still be careful, but it helps.

[mark clemson]

20 hours ago, HazelBliss said:

 My friend and her date had masked sex, doggystyle

LOL, THAT is not a solution. You can, from what I understand, get it from intercourse and of course mask or no doggystyle will still involve lots of breathing in close proximity to each for (I'm hoping) more than 15 min total.

If you want to put on actual hospital level PPE and maybe 3 condoms then maybe. But of course, what would be the point (unless you happen to have some weird kinks for that sort of stuff).

Viruses are microscopic. Not sure if looking into a caretaker for your mom is feasible, but that might help make it more feasible to have a relationship. Definitely consider getting vaccinated as mentioned above.

Perhaps consider trying to establish a monogamous relationship with a guy who's not very social and waiting on sex until the guy is "firm" on it being you only and then "pod" with him where you both agree to limit contact with others. Kind of a PIA, but you'd have to decide if it's worth it.

Edited May 14, 2021 by mark clemson

[HazelBliss]

5 minutes ago, mark clemson said:

LOL, THAT is not a solution. You can, from what I understand, get it from intercourse and of course mask or no doggystyle will still involve lots of breathing in close proximity to each for (I'm hoping) more than 15 min total.

If you want to put on actual hospital level PPE and maybe 3 condoms then maybe. But of course, what would be the point (unless you happen to have some weird kinks for that sort of stuff).

Viruses are microscopic. Not sure if looking into a caretaker for your mom is feasible, but that might help make it more feasible to have a relationship. Definitely consider getting vaccinated as mentioned above.

Perhaps consider trying to establish a monogamous relationship with a guy who's not very social and waiting on sex until the guy is "firm" on it being you only and then "pod" with him where you both agree to limit contact with others. Kind of a PIA, but you'd have to decide if it's worth it.

Its weird how people think this vaccine is a cure. You can still contract covid..  the symptoms for you will just be less severe or none at all (according to the experts) I know nurses who contracted covid multiple times and after vaccination. This is not a cure. People still need to take precautions. I did the best I could going to the parks aside from my little “fling”.  My mother is fully vaccinated. I am still undecided.. even as a nurse. 

I am currently talking to a man for the purpose of dating but I told him I wanted to wait a couple of weeks before we linked up to make sure I am in the clear.. this has been my life since covid.. only waiting after my two tests to be around people d/t my job. In this case its my little trip.. but at least i’m being considerate.. unlike some people in this world

[mark clemson]

Not a cure, true - but it should reduce risk quite a bit. Read the latest (US) CDC guidance. They seem to now think transmission by vaccinated people to others is minimal, particularly if both are vaccinated.

Of course, their guidance might change (again) and so perhaps that's not something to risk one's Mom's life on, true. But, if I was in your shoes I'd strongly consider getting vaccinated (and in my case I actually have).

I do applaud your responsibility WRT transmission risk to others. No doubt it's been quite rough.

[HazelBliss]

1 hour ago, smackie9 said:

I know people have ants in their pants and want things back to normal.....sorry to be a downer but two people in my life died from Covid, one just this week. Why take any kind of risk?

Poor choice. I learned my lesson and hoping for the best.

[HazelBliss]

3 minutes ago, mark clemson said:

Not a cure, true - but it should reduce risk quite a bit. Read the latest (US) CDC guidance. They seem to now think transmission by vaccinated people to others is minimal, particularly if both are vaccinated.

Of course, their guidance might change (again) and so perhaps that's not something to risk one's Mom's life on, true. But, if I was in your shoes I'd strongly consider getting vaccinated (and in my case I actually have).

I do applaud your responsibility WRT transmission risk to others. No doubt it's been quite rough.

I appreciate your input. Which one did you take if you don’t mind me asking?

[mark clemson]

Moderna. No side effects in my case except for arm pain.

[Miss Spider]

21 hours ago, HazelBliss said:

 

 

My friend and her date had masked sex, doggystyle  LOL...

 

Lol. You gave me inspiration for a painting. Thanks. To answer your question, this is something I haven’t got the chance to worry about. And I’m kind of bummed out about that. ..2nd the advice asking about vaxxed status and showing them your little card. Oh what a world we live in

 

[ASG]

I have definitely not been stuck at home. I take precautions, but I go out whenever I can. Places are open, I am going to them. With friends. 

And I've also hooked up with one of those friends. Several times now. He had covid when we went into a second lockdown, but I hadn't seen him for a while and didn't for months after, until lockdown finished. 

I don't obsess about it. I do get tested at work, and I have the option to get tested at the pharmacy if I want to. I'm not actively looking for hookups or sex, but if they come my way, I'm not saying no, either. 

[HazelBliss]

33 minutes ago, ASG said:

I don't obsess about it. I do get tested at work, and I have the option to get tested at the pharmacy if I want to. I'm not actively looking for hookups or sex, but if they come my way, I'm not saying no, either. 

Good for you! Having to worry about stds and covid is sucky tho. Having a monogomous relationship IS helpful BUT.. but my friend’s boyfriend gave it to her... and my cousins bf gave it to one of her children.. SOOO UHHH... at this point the risk is everywhere.. but i’m def gonna be smarter in my choices now that my drought is over smh. 

[ASG]

17 hours ago, HazelBliss said:

Good for you! Having to worry about stds and covid is sucky tho. Having a monogomous relationship IS helpful BUT.. but my friend’s boyfriend gave it to her... and my cousins bf gave it to one of her children.. SOOO UHHH... at this point the risk is everywhere.. but i’m def gonna be smarter in my choices now that my drought is over smh. 

There will always be a risk... Of catching literally anything. Get vaccinated and the risk of getting covid goes down drastically. Otherwise, the only way to be SAFE is to literally not leave the house and not see anyone. Because just because you know and trust a person, and it is a member of your family or a good friend, it doesn't mean they won't get covid and then pass it on to you. 

Most people get covid at home. As in, one person in the household gets it and passes it on to the rest of the household. So yeah, even making smart choices means little.