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Girls that don't initiate contact but always reply?


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I know this issue will come up again and again but it happens. What do you think of it? Came to mind recently when talking to this girl and she never initiates ANYTHING but yet she replies? It's bothering me. 

She takes awhile to reply few hours sometimes a day, doesnt bother me as im very similar with this, as im busy and tend to like to reply when I have time to sit and think about what im saying rather than a rushed response.

I suppose it could be down to either her being shy, playing hard to get, dont want to be awkward or old fashion? The guy has to do the chasing and initiating?

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You hit the nail on the head:  Old fashioned gender roles requiring the guy to do the chasing.  If it bothers you point blank tell her to initiate once in a while.  

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How old are the both of you?

Taking a long time to text back is either disinterest overall (she's not very interested in speaking with you), she doesn't like texting (not everyone is a big texter) or she's passive aggressive and immature. 

Call her if you want to ask her out on a date. Endless texting is no good for anyone and goes nowhere. If a man has gotten a hold of my number or I've given it to him and he begins texting me several times and still no date, I stop responding. 

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dramafreezone
17 hours ago, Amazin said:

I know this issue will come up again and again but it happens. What do you think of it? Came to mind recently when talking to this girl and she never initiates ANYTHING but yet she replies? It's bothering me. 

She takes awhile to reply few hours sometimes a day, doesnt bother me as im very similar with this, as im busy and tend to like to reply when I have time to sit and think about what im saying rather than a rushed response.

I suppose it could be down to either her being shy, playing hard to get, dont want to be awkward or old fashion? The guy has to do the chasing and initiating?

She either doesn't have a high level of interest in you, or she's sticking to some rules she read in a book that says that the guy always has to contact you first.  The first one will resolve as her interest increases.  The second is manipulation.

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Yep - she's following old fashioned gender roles.   And I bet that if you slowed down on contacting her, she'd be writing here asking why you're losing interest 😉

If you really like her, talk to her about it - tell her that you'd love to see some enthusiasm on her part.   If you don't really like her that much, just stop calling.  

 

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On 4/4/2021 at 5:33 AM, Amazin said:

 Came to mind recently when talking to this girl and she never initiates ANYTHING but yet she replies? 

Are you dating or just talking? 

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I wait for the guy to initiate as I like a man who can lead in the beginning. The only part that's bothering me about your post is the response time. I try to respond as quickly as possible. Sometimes I'm in meetings or something and can't respond for a few hours. But if it's all the time I would gather interest may not be high.

 

Does she do anything to try to continue the conversation? Some flirty emojis? Stuff like that. If it's very short and she's taking forever it may be more disinterest than gender roles. Have you asked her out? If so, how serious did her response seem?

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  • 4 weeks later...

She's not interested in you but will politely reply as she is a nice person.  Forget about old fashioned gender roles.  If I really like a guy, I write to him first.  Why would she be playing games?  

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