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Have you given up on dating prospects in your area?


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I was wondering, with the same people I've seen on dating sites for a while, I wonder if some people have given up on prospects at least locally? That no one is good enough.

Meetup groups (pre-Covid), I've notice, was kind of a litmus test for that. Some women I've met at these groups were one and dones pretty much. They'd show up, scouting (this goes for both men and women), these more organized events. Then you never see them again. They don't stick around long enough for the possibility of someone they are attracted to actually shows up. They never give it a chance.

I knew of one woman that said she needs to get the hell out of the state because there's NO men in her area that are what she's looking for, and if they are, they are gay (she did a LOL at the end there).

Of course, some are single parents that can't leave due to their kids. So they are kind of stuck just being home bodies because "going out", well, they just can't meet people that way. Thus the online dating route.

So, what do you think, have you given up on an entire geographic location because you THINK there are no prospects in your area?  Ever consider relocating just for the purpose of finding better dating prospects?

Or, you may have to be willing to commute a couple of hours, because anyone within a half hour of where you live are missing teeth or its an area where most people are married with children.

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I think its a loaded question really. Moving away unless you town is really small wont serve much purpose, rather look at and try understand why its not working for you and the inherent fundamentals.

I

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Trail Blazer

No, I never did, but I live in a decent-sized city.  I could imagine it being a problem if you lived in a small town.

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19 hours ago, QuietRiot said:

So, what do you think, have you given up on an entire geographic location because you THINK there are no prospects in your area?  Ever consider relocating just for the purpose of finding better dating prospects?

If you live in a smallish or even medium sized area the numbers just might be too small to meet a good match. I’d say anything under a population of 100K is going to be tough. 
 

I remember a woman posting on here years ago and she lived in a biggish city, but it was very corporate / finance driven and she was kind of a “hippy”. She had so many posts about how terrible men were and how horrible her dating experiences were. Her last post mentioned that she was moving to Portland, Oregon and she never posted again...

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dramafreezone

Move to a more populated area?

I live in San Diego, population 1.4m.  It's not possible for me to meet and date all women that I would have a shot with.  And I live in downtown SD.  Really overwhelming if anything.  Only time I started seeing women more than once is for a couple of months when I was into speed dating.  So I stopped doing that.

Move immediately if not sooner.

Edited by dramafreezone
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No, I wouldn't move to meet someone. Not a wise decision and not at the top of my priorities especially with the pandemic going on. This might work for a younger age group or individuals who are under pressure to marry/have kids/settle down. 

It's interesting you mentioned the same people or profiles on OLD. I can't imagine there being a great number of people invested in meeting anyone at the current conditions so it makes sense if the pool of potential matches is very, very small.

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The problem is its easy to think moving is the answer, the truth its the only thing that changes is the environment, people are fundamentally all the same wherever you go, yes cultures can differ but of more value is to look at your own value and outlook see whether that can be improved in some way.

There are of course stories about people flying to meet people in far flung areas of the world, very often these go bad because you can only gauge so much online. 

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9 hours ago, glows said:

No, I wouldn't move to meet someone. Not a wise decision and not at the top of my priorities especially with the pandemic going on. This might work for a younger age group or individuals who are under pressure to marry/have kids/settle down. 

It's interesting you mentioned the same people or profiles on OLD. I can't imagine there being a great number of people invested in meeting anyone at the current conditions so it makes sense if the pool of potential matches is very, very small.

Well, there are active profiles of people here locally. But the topic applies even to the pre-Covid days. Seeing the same faces of the same women I'd already emailed in the past, nary a response. Sometimes I'd make another attempt a few months later, but nothing.

[]

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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l live in a bad area for women. Although there are some honey's around they're few and far between most are over weight and nothing l'm use too or would go for. After divorce l was horrified at what was out there it was ok married but not being anymore hell yeah l would've moved for sure but with my situation l couldn't anyway, but l would've. Turned out l did meet someone v special locally but that turned out she was only visiting and actually lived 1200 km away ironically. Anyway we worked it out and she's mostly down here with me these days and she'll move down full time when some things up home that will still take awhile to sort out yet are done.

Edited by chillii
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5 hours ago, ZA Dater said:

The problem is its easy to think moving is the answer, the truth its the only thing that changes is the environment, people are fundamentally all the same wherever you go,

If you live in a place where you can’t relate to the majority, then it might be an idea to move. For example if you live in an area where it’s a party, drinking, sports culture and education isn’t a priority for most people, you can certainly move to an area with more diversity. The party / sports / uneducated will still be there of course, but there will be larger representation from other groups too. 

 

Put another way, if you live in a farm town and have no interest in farming, time to move. 

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1 hour ago, Weezy1973 said:

If you live in a place where you can’t relate to the majority, then it might be an idea to move. For example if you live in an area where it’s a party, drinking, sports culture and education isn’t a priority for most people, you can certainly move to an area with more diversity. The party / sports / uneducated will still be there of course, but there will be larger representation from other groups too. 

 

Put another way, if you live in a farm town and have no interest in farming, time to move. 

Agree but most cities do have variety to lesser or greater degrees. Matching with people in other countries is quite pointless though in my opinion.

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21 hours ago, ZA Dater said:

Agree but most cities do have variety to lesser or greater degrees. Matching with people in other countries is quite pointless though in my opinion.

Yes, matching in other countries is pointless. But moving to a country that is more in line with your values makes sense. My wife didn’t like the heavy drinking culture in the country she was born into so moved to my city. And she’s now been here almost a decade, and doesn’t have plans to go back.

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There are many reasons why I would never live in a small town.  Living in a very big city, I would never have this problem.

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On 4/1/2021 at 5:21 AM, QuietRiot said:

Well, there are active profiles of people here locally. But the topic applies even to the pre-Covid days. Seeing the same faces of the same women I'd already emailed in the past, nary a response. Sometimes I'd make another attempt a few months later, but nothing.

[]

I think the people on there that don't respond might not be paying members. In the small town I live in, there is a couple that goes to OLD sites for entertainment. Then they talk about people with profiles out there and laugh about profiles. Things like: I see Amy is looking for a boyfriend, she has an OLD profile.

Some create profiles because they like the attention. They aren't seriously looking for a "relationship". 

 

 

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When I divorced my ex-husband we were living on a military base. There was no way I'd continue my life in that area and remarry a military as they were the only prospects for women there. I moved in the suburbs of a city of 4 millions, problem solved. Now Even in a city of that many people I'm still seeing the same faces online. Not long ago I had a peak in a popular dating app and I saw faces that were there 5-6-7 years ago, with their same pictures. 

Edited by Gaeta
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Cookiesandough

Are you sure you’re not just making a big assumption(especially if these weren’t even dating meetups?) that the women at these meetups didn’t return to the group because they didn’t see anyone they liked? Perhaps they just went to see what it was like or they got busy with other things? 

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15 hours ago, Gaeta said:

When I divorced my ex-husband we were living on a military base. There was no way I'd continue my life in that area and remarry a military as they were the only prospects for women there. I moved in the suburbs of a city of 4 millions, problem solved. Now Even in a city of that many people I'm still seeing the same faces online. Not long ago I had a peak in a popular dating app and I saw faces that were there 5-6-7 years ago, with their same pictures. 

 

lt is amazingly true. l grew up in a city of 5million and it could be one lonely place for sure.Millions of people alone in large cities.

 

 

 

 

Edited by chillii
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