ThePhenom Posted March 29, 2021 Share Posted March 29, 2021 It’s been exactly a year now since I (28 M) last seen my ex (29 F) and the last time we ever saw each other we made love and for the first time spend a night together in a hotel.. lockdown happened and during lockdown, out of the blue she turned cold and very horrible towards me and left me.. there’s so much more to it, but she’s with someone new so soon after leaving me which broke me and til this day eats me up because I loved this girl so very much. As much as I tell myself I’m over her, my heart tells me no... but I feel like it was all a dream and that person, that girl I was in love with didn’t actually exist and that it was just how I saw her and how I tolerated everything. My family want me to get married and coming from a country where arranged marriage is a thing, my family want me to sort my life out now but I can never make them understand how I miss her and that I just can’t give myself to anyone. It’s not like my heart doesn’t want to accept anyone new.. I don’t know if it’s because of the trauma because a lot happened when she turned on me or because I’m still in love with her.. I don’t know... but I’m convinced tho that girl never existed.. because when I look back and the way she was at times and how more or less every other day she spoke about her ex, she wasn’t into me as much as I was in to her and that maybe I was a rebound. It hurts so frikkin bad and I just want the pain to stop.. I haven’t slept properly in a year, sleeping pills don’t work.. day and night I’m thinking of the girl I think I once knew Has anyone been through something similar? And how did you overcome it? Thank you Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted March 29, 2021 Share Posted March 29, 2021 Sorry you're hurting. A tube of ice cream and a box of tissues. Then, surrounded myself with my female friends or tried picking up a new hobby. Exercise really helps too! Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThePhenom Posted March 29, 2021 Author Share Posted March 29, 2021 58 minutes ago, Alpaca said: Sorry you're hurting. A tube of ice cream and a box of tissues. Then, surrounded myself with my female friends or tried picking up a new hobby. Exercise really helps too! I don’t have any female friends 😂 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted March 29, 2021 Share Posted March 29, 2021 6 minutes ago, ThePhenom said: I don’t have any female friends 😂 Oops! Sorry. A whole meat lovers pizza. Surround yourself with male friends and pick up a new hobby? Exercise helps too! And, maybe once your ready, get back out there dating again. It's a painful journey, for sure. If you're still not sleeping properly after a year, however, that may be worth looking into. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted March 29, 2021 Share Posted March 29, 2021 8 hours ago, ThePhenom said: My family want me to get married and coming from a country where arranged marriage is a thing, my family want me to sort my life out now Do you have a say in the arranged marriage? Can you select from a few that your parents arrange for you to meet? Is she also scheduled for an arranged marriage? It seems like you are depressed about the impending marriage situation. This isn't so much about "the one who got away" as it is the cultural pressure on you to marry x woman by y time. Talk to your parents. Explain that you don't want to marry right now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThePhenom Posted March 29, 2021 Author Share Posted March 29, 2021 3 hours ago, Wiseman2 said: Do you have a say in the arranged marriage? Can you select from a few that your parents arrange for you to meet? Is she also scheduled for an arranged marriage? It seems like you are depressed about the impending marriage situation. This isn't so much about "the one who got away" as it is the cultural pressure on you to marry x woman by y time. Talk to your parents. Explain that you don't want to marry right now. I do have a say, they’re not forcing me but it’s just there as an option. nope she isn’t, apperantly she has found someone few weeks after breaking up with me and last time she spoke to me she told me she was getting married to him in April but not sure if she was lying to hurt me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 29, 2021 Share Posted March 29, 2021 You need to rely on your logic. Emotions are keeping you tied to her. When you find yourself thinking about her, remind yourself of the abrupt about-face she did & how cold she was at the break up. Tell yourself she is not a good person & that a better partner is out there. You simply have to let go of her so that you can move forward toward your real future. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts