Gaeta Posted March 20, 2021 Share Posted March 20, 2021 I have a big moral dilemma 🙂 Before Covid my teen girl was looking for a small purse to use at a friends gathering. I remembered I had this small black purse with a chain in my closet I had never used. The purse was given to me years earlier by an ex-sister in law. At the time when she gave me the purse I thought hhhmmm why would I want to use a purse with a big C on it. So it ended up in my closet for the next 15 years. My teen being more of this world sees the purse and says you sure you want to give this to me???? I go: yes why it's just a purse!! and she tells me it's a chanel and it's probably worth $1,800 so I feel generous and I tell her to keep it. So turns out the purse is worth between 5k to 8k. Can I ask for the purse back? lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 20, 2021 Share Posted March 20, 2021 (edited) You never liked it so unless you need to sell it to pay the mortgage I wouldn't ask for it back. I would sit teen down & show her comparable bags on line & impress upon her the need to treasure this Chanel bag. If she's smart she will hang on to it forever. It's not like they go out of style. If you think she's not mature enough to handle this, take the purse back to safeguard it & give it back to her periodically to wear for various suitable events: graduations, weddings etc.  Edited March 20, 2021 by d0nnivain 2 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted March 20, 2021 Share Posted March 20, 2021 My worry is that she will be a target for muggers, if she uses it out and about like an ordinary purse. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gaeta Posted March 20, 2021 Author Share Posted March 20, 2021 Right now it's in her bedroom and she promises me it's safe but l saw that lamb leather need special storage. Notice being packed under other purses kept it nice. I was thinking 5k could go toward her first car, college, her first apartment furniture. But ya, a gift is a gift. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gaeta Posted March 20, 2021 Author Share Posted March 20, 2021 1 hour ago, elaine567 said: My worry is that she will be a target for muggers, if she uses it out and about like an ordinary purse. For sure I can't let her do that at 16 (17 next month). Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 20, 2021 Share Posted March 20, 2021 (edited) So take it back under the guise of keeping it nice. Chanel bags usually come with a bag that you store them in. Since you got it second hand, you might not have that but perhaps look into getting one.  I share @elaine567's concern that she could become a target if she tries to carry this high end bag as her every day purse so caution her about that. It's funny, DH & I splurged on a high end sports car a while back & I still fear getting car jacked when I drive it. When she starts pestering you for a car, revisit the value of the bag & then ask her if she wants to sell it to contribute to the car. I don't know a teen on earth who would rather have a purse than a car.  Edited March 20, 2021 by d0nnivain 2 Link to post Share on other sites
hippychick3 Posted March 20, 2021 Share Posted March 20, 2021 I would take it back under the agreement that you’d sell it and use that money as a down payment for her future car. I’m sure she’d be rather have that than a purse! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gaeta Posted March 21, 2021 Author Share Posted March 21, 2021 She said yes she thinks it's smarter to use the money for her first car but she didn't say it with much enthusiasm lol. She understand it's a lot of money for a purse and there are smarter ways to use money. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 21, 2021 Share Posted March 21, 2021 When it's time maybe you can buy her a knock off.  Link to post Share on other sites
Fletch Lives Posted March 21, 2021 Share Posted March 21, 2021 haha! Indian giver! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lotsgoingon Posted March 21, 2021 Share Posted March 21, 2021 Take it back for sure. Sure, as a teenager, she'll miss the status. But trust me, in 20 years, you let her keep this thing (and OMG if it gets stolen or worn down), she'll be like, "My mom didn't know how to value things. She let me have a $5K purse, when that should have been invested in my education. What kind of parent does that?" Think long term here. Your daughter will appreciate taking it back---for sure!  1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Gaeta Posted March 21, 2021 Author Share Posted March 21, 2021 @Lotsgoingon: haha, good point. I continue cleaning my closet maybe I'll find something I can retire on lol. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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