Is it common for guys to still be 'friends' with their ex's on social media?

[Starswillshine]

I think I have most of my ex's as "friends" on social media. Granted, minus my ex-husband, they are all from 20 years ago. My boyfriend has all but his most recent ex-girlfriend as friends on social media. However, neither of us interact with any of the exes. I don't "like" anything and he does not either. And only because we both have pretty extreme boundaries given our cheating exes. 

If it makes you uncomfortable, just tell him that it makes you uncomfortable that he "likes" her post or that they are still friends. He will either respect that and stop/remove or he won't, and it is up to you to decide how you feel about that and what you will do with it. When you speak it and leave little room for misinterpretation, then you will know what level of care he has for your feelings. 

[SumGuy]

On 2/9/2021 at 8:03 PM, Katkats7777 said:

Yes civil but I don't understand the whole keeping in touch and still liking each other pictures on social media, they are an ex for a reason. 

Depends on the reason.  Sometimes the break-up is because they mutually discover/agree a romantic relationship does not work for them, yet the friendship does.   

I just figure part and parcel of being "civil" these days is keeping in touch via social media, but I really wouldn't know as don't do social media.

[HiCrunchy]

On 2/9/2021 at 6:18 PM, Katkats7777 said:

So when one totally deletes their ex's off on social media including pictures and then they start dating someone new, is it because they do it out of respect for their new girlfriend or do they just delete them because things ended ugly?

Probably because he moved on and doesn't see her as a romantic love interest anymore. So they can just be friends now.

[neowulf]

On 2/10/2021 at 9:09 AM, basil67 said:

I guess it's because they ended on civil terms and they felt no need to jettison the other one as if they never existed.

^This

I don't hate my ex's.  Hell, I'm on good terms with all of them.  Sure, some of them preferred not to stay in contact and I respected that decision.

But the ones who wanted to stay on friendly terms?  I don't have a problem.  I want them to be happy.  It's nice seeing people I care about doing well.

Also, the weird notion that once you stop dating someone you stop caring about them?  The relationship failed.  Doesn't mean I have to hate the person.

[poppyfields]

8 minutes ago, neowulf said:

Also, the weird notion that once you stop dating someone you stop caring about them?  The relationship failed.  Doesn't mean I have to hate the person.

I don't think anyone is advocating you stop caring.  It's just that for some people, it's not easy transitioning from being emotionally and physically intimate to merely being friends.

I've never been able to.  If some can, more power to em.

Me?  I still care about them, maybe even still love them, but from a distance.  

I also believe you can love more than one person simultaneously. Some people we never stop loving, which is ok.

Life goes on.  

[attached_soul]

I think its more of a personal choice but i myself tend to end things for good when I break up with someone. its like you are still attached to this person when you still friends after a breakup . you start healing when you truly let go and I believe being friends is not such a good idea in this regard 

[LivingWaterPlease]

I'm friends with the last ex in my life on FB but I unfollowed him bc I'm very attracted to his personality but don't want to be with him for other reasons. He broke up with me bc I wouldn't marry him. So he doesn't know I unfollowed him, I don't think, anyway.

The ex before that stalked me and I'm not friends with him on FB as I had to take out a restraining order. Another ex on FB didn't join until recently and I see no reason to friend him.